[atskitty2]

I'm sorry, could you remind me what you posted seeking advice on? You seem to be ignoring the guidance offered, and in denial about all the evidence to support our encouragement.

I'm inclined to think you're an attention seeking troll or just really incapable of seeing the writing on the wall. I think you're just going to have to learn the hard way, as you have no reasoning or rationalizing ability.
Good luck to you. Get some intensive counseling for your severely low self esteem and lack of self respect. You need that regardless what is really happening here.

[Rebecca_93]

amy40 - You misread. I meant that my fiancee has to hide that he goes to church for his wife, so he can't take his son to church.

He can't educate his child about God! So you see? He obviously can't stay with her.

I know my parents will not support me if I say the man I am engaged to is already married, even if he is in the church. They would be very disappointed to find out I lost my purity to him. They are very old fashioned

[amy40]

They are very old fashioned

and so yes your parents will be disappointed but they raised you and if you need them when this all comes crashing down, they should be there for you as imagine you will need someone

[Rebecca_93]

I finally heard from him...well it was more that I saw him at church. I could feel his eyes on me as we listened to the service, then afterwards he approached me and asked if we could talk. I was so happy to finally see him again!!

He apologised for being difficult to contact. He said that he had been busy with work and other things. But he also said he needed time to himself to digest the news about "our little miracle"..yes he really did say that!!

He seemed excited and mentioned that he is busy organising things. I'm so happy to have him back. I know I have to tell him at some point, but how long do you think until he might notice?

[amy40]

let us know what happens when he learns the truth

we'll be here.....

[Carlana_Flower]

It sounds like you are in a difficult spot sweetheart. I have read some of the comments and they seem to be unfairly judgmental of your fiancee, yourself and men generally. All I can say is be wary of scorned women and their words of "advice"

I was in a similar position myself. I fell in love with a married man. I knew that he was married when the affair began, but that didnt stop us. We went on to have a beautiful child together. After I got pregnant he left his wife and two children. He was similar to your fiancee, in that he was sick of the wife not simply doing her duties and focussing too much on the children. We had our own challenges in the process but we made it work

What he doesnt know however is that it is very very probably not his child. But what he doesnt know cant hurt him

So yes, sometimes there are lies that come from the heart but in the end it can work out. Just remember there are some things in life you need to be businesslike about...go and find a man who can actually support a child. You just need to have strength and remind yourself that if theres a will theres a way

[amy40]

All I can say is be wary of scorned women and their words of "advice)

hi carlana
my responses are as a married woman with a child
so I know how important a dad is to a child, especially an elementary aged child (as in this thread)

[Texasred]

Rebecca, I'm sure if I were one who memorized the Bible without giving any thought to its meaning, i could easily find a verse that clearly defines the Judeo-Christian view of adultery. The 7th Commandment, for example. I'm not saying you should obey these laws, but at least be honest with yourself when you know you're not.

[Texasred]

Rebecca, I'm sure if I were one who memorized the Bible without giving any thought to its meaning, i could easily find a verse that clearly defines the Judeo-Christian view of adultery. The 7th Commandment, for example. I'm not saying you should obey these laws, but at least be honest with yourself when you know you're not.

[amy40]

he was sick of the wife focussing too much on the children.

children can't raise themselves and need "time" from the parents and lots of it

if a parent has a child, it's their responsibility to care for that child, be the adult, and be there for them
no idea how becca's fiancé has any time for her unless he's shirking his duties as a dad
becca's right to feel sorry for the son