[kaylar]

Being an 'Other Woman' requires a certain level of stupidity.
Lying to one's self is the major activity.

When the Husband leaves, (it would be incorrect to say
he 'returns' to his wife as he never left his wife), the
other woman concocts all sorts of reasons why he 'must'
come back.

Unless he left a lot of money, or very important items in
her home, he will not return.

One of the hallmarks of where he lives is where he keeps
his 'treasures'. They could be awards he won in High School,
photos of his parents, a base ball card collection, etc.

Where his 'treasures' are, so to his heart. If he does not
bring them to the home of the Other Woman, or if he does and
then removes them, it is very clear what and where this
relationship is.

Although it seems evident to anyone observing the situation,
the typical Other Woman never accepts the fact that the Husband
is simply using her. She will continually believe that he did
love her at some point and that something 'happened' beyond
her control which caused him to 'stop' loving her.

Evidence is useless. She will never accept the fact from
the day he saw her, until the day he left, she was as 'real'
to him as a role is to an actor.

The few Other Women who appreciate their status are often
the 'Golddiggers'. These are women who are in it for what
they can get. They keep a running balance, and the day
they are told it is over are in a lawyer's office getting all
forms of restraining orders to prevent him disposing of his
property.

Often, they've gotten the DNA test done at the birth of
a child, (if there is a child), gotten property in their names,
i.e. a townhouse, a car, shares in a company, and have
made certain an Insurance policy has been bought in
their names.

Those who don't have children have garnered as much
value as they can, those who do have children use them
to drain as much money as possible from the husband.

When the relationship ends, the husband often winds up
paying more for the outside child than he did for his inside
children.

[Lucy44]

being the other woman

A lot of what you are saying is true about being the ow, but what if your married man is seen with you in nice public places everywhere in your hometown and out of town, and his wife knows of you, but the ow never harasses his wife or family and the wife never harasses the ow. He loves money more than he cares about me that i know because his wife does make more than he does, and that's his reason for staying, he does not admit it but i know it, and she accepts his infidelities. I am to the point where i want to end it after over 10 years. I just want to live right. I donot even wish for us to be together anymore, because that would still be wrong. I really want to end this, but i am afraid and don't quite know how.

When a marriage breaks down, whether a divorce or
simply one spouse leaving; the fact there had been
a 'reality' allows a kind of 'logical' closure.

At some point this man loved this woman and married
her. They lived together. She knew his family, his
thoughts, his truth.

She was part of his life.
They lived together, they bought furniture, food,
argued over little things, had children, there was
a real relationship that everyone knew about.

She was Mrs. Him. She had rights.
Society respected those rights.

Now the marriage has ended.
The divorce has been obtained, or he has
run off because he can't deal with whatever.

She knows that at one point their love was real.
At one point her life, her relationship was real.

The Other Woman has nothing even remotely akin
to that reality.

The Other Woman knows absolutely nothing at all
beyond WHAT HE TELLS HER.

This can never be ignored. It is the centrepiece.
She knows NOTHING EXCEPT WHAT HE TELLS HER.

Because the Other Woman is not the wife, because
she has no 'hold' on him, because she has plunged
into a relationship that began, is, will be, and end
as fraud, she creates her own reality.

He tells her he is going to be out of town on
business and will call her.

She doesn't know that he and his wife are going
on holiday.

While the wife is on the patio with friends he calls
the Other Woman from the bathroom, and pretends
he's working. He gets hard knowing that the fool
believes him. He enjoys this, and returns to the patio
with a big grin on his face and kisses his wife.

The Other Woman doesn't know he's taking his
wife to a fancy dinner. He's told her that he's
turning in early because he doesn't feel well.

He tells the Other Woman that his wife is a mental
case. The Other Woman doesn't know the Wife is
getting a Masters in Biology.

He tells the Other Woman that he is worried about
his children. His children play so little part in his
life he scarcely remembers their names.

He tells the Other Woman how he loves her.
In fact, he doesn't even like her.

He never discusses what is important to him
with her, she has no idea what he truely thinks
about anything. He tells her what he wants her
to know. When he walks into her house he puts
on his fantasy persona, and plays his role until
it's time to be himself again.

Hence, everything she thinks she 'knows' about
him is a lie. It is a deliberate crafted lie.

When he leaves the Other Woman, she has nothing
to hang on to but lies. Lies that he cares if she lives
or dies.

It never dawns on her that when he dumps her, if
she were to die, he wouldn't even come to the
funeral.

If never dawns on the Other woman, during the months
she dreams of him, that if she were to be injured and
lying in a gully, she couldn't call him for help.

The Other Woman keeps believing the fantasies,
keeps holding on to the belief he will 'come back to her',
never realising that he was never with her.

[kaylar]

I know exactly where you are


A lot of wives, as in your case, don't care anymore.
They look at their husband as if he's a drunkard and
tell their friends, "I'm so happy he found another woman
to babysit him."

He'll never his wife. If she throws him out he'll look
for someone else to support him. He is a dead loss.

You can end it.
Date other men.
You owe him nothing.

Don't be home when he comes, don't take his calls,
tell him it's over.

He has wasted ten years of your life. I know the
kind of man he is. I've come across a number of them.

At first he makes the OW think he's in love with her
and can't divorce his wife blah blah, but he'd never
divorce her, because of the money issue.

She can have lovers every night in the week, but as
long as he has money in his pocket it is okay by him.

Get rid of him.
Let him ruin someone else's life.
I bet you're more faithful to him than his wife is.

[kaylar]

And Speaking Of ****ina....


There are Other Women who are not precisely 'victims'.
These are the predatory beasts, the psychologically/
emotionally damaged who 'specialise' in married men.

There is a population of women who only need to
know a man is married and living with his wife, to
open wide her legs.

In previous posts I mentioned George. George was
and has been divorced from Tina for many years.
Yet George tells the women he meet he is married.

Why would a man who is absolutely free tell anyone
he is married?

It is an aphrodesiac.

George, during the currency of his marriage to
Tina, became irresistable. Up until his marriage
he was an average guy.

Once it became public knowledge he was a
married man, girls like ****ina began throwing
panties at him...WHY?

Normal girls go through puberty when they
need to know if they are 'attractive' to men.
They often flirt with another girl's boyfriend
just to see how they compare to the other
girl.

It isn't the boy...it is the girl they are focused
on. Am I prettier than her? Am I sexier than her?

No one has gone through High School without
seeing/being part of that 'triangle' in which a
girl, often your friend, (or you) makes a play
for the boyfriend.

Some girls only go so far to get asked out
or have him ask for their number.

Some girls do not stop until he becomes
their boyfriend.

This is due to the insecurity and feelings
of inferiority these girls, (or you if you
were in the boy catcher batch) experience
at a young age.

Many girls 'grow out' of this. They don't
like the opprobrium of their peers, they
don't like having to 'please' the boy to
get him. Further, it may make them feel
even more trashy when the girl whose
boyfriend they have taken goes on to
find another boyfriend and they are stuck
with her old one.

Potential Other Women grow to maturity
still holding on to this; "Am I pretty?
Am I sexy?
Do men find me attractive?
Am I better than Wife?"
And pursue married men with the single
mindedness of a moth flying into a flame.

These women will do anything, and I mean
anything to please the married man, unlike
the eglatarian relationship he has with his
wife.

Men like George have no dearth of candidates
to screw, and realise, after the first or second,
how pathetic these females are.

He can buy a blue movie and then go through
the moves with these Other Women, because
to please him is the centre of their lives.

He couldn't bring that movie into the house
he shares with his wife, because he respects
his wife.

The attitude of the character Robert De Niro
played in "Analyze This!" is not uncommon.

Many men will say a version of...

"Ask her to do what with the mouth
she uses to kiss my children?"

Hence the Other Woman is a walking blow
job.

[kaylar]

****ina Two


****ina goes after a married man, knowing he is married.
She is no innocent vicitm. She is not fooled into any
relationship. She goes after the man BECAUSE he is
married.

Having emotional/psychological problems, she needs
the feeling that she has 'stolen' this man from someone
else. She needs to believe she is 'better' than the wife
and will interpret anything he does or says as proof.

Faye, knowing Tina, believing Tina was George's wife,
went after him the way a cat stalks a rat.

There was nothing out of the way or too much trouble
for Faye to do to get George's attention.

George, seeing how easy Faye was, made it a bit
difficult for her, because he was getting endless
amusement.

Finally he allowed her into his bed, where she did
all those things one can find in a blue movie.

Faye felt great knowing that she was just as
pretty and maybe more attractive than George's
wife Tina.

To explain why Tina wasn't around, George told
some lies about her having to travel somewhere.

Tina had, however, divorced George years ago.

When Faye saw Tina appearing in the loo of the
university she attended, she nearly had a heart
attack.

Of all the people she didn't want to see or expect
to see, Tina was first on the list.

Faye covered, then ran to ask George about it.

George took the reappearance of Tina as his
cue to dump Faye.

Now George had no wife to go back to, no
marriage to preserve. But he, who had told
Faye that he was still married to Tina, had
the perfect exit line.

Being married makes dumping the O.W.
so easy that it's surprising more men don't
pretend they are married so that they can
get easy screws from women like Faye
then drop them like bad habits.

[kaylar]

Bad Endings


Relationships with another woman's husband always end Badly.

The Standard is that he screws around with the O.W.
then dumps her.

His dumping is like throwing out the trash.

I don't mince words here, because the majority of Married
Men NEVER LEAVE THEIR WIVES.

They want a bit on the side, the O.W. is that bit.

He has no respect for the O.W.
A man marries a woman he considers 'worthy' of his 'name.'
An O.W. is not 'worthy.'

The Second category of adulterous husbands are the
cyclic Monogamists.

They get bored with wife, start an affair.
They Divorce their wives, marry the O.W.
then start an affair with a new O.W.
They divorce their wife, (their old O.W.)
marry the new O.W. and are as unfaithful to
her as they were with the previous wives.

Take Mia Farrow, the text book O.W.

She always went after other women's husbands.
Like Angelina Jolie, a man being married was her
aphrodesiac.

Mia went after Sinatra, he dumped his girlfriend,
married her, then they divorced. She went after
Andre Previn, who was married, had him dump his
wife, and married him.

After ten years she moved on to Woody Allen.
Woody Allen never married her.
He married a young girl she had adopted.

Mia Farrow, in her sixities is alone and unwanted.

Sinatra went on to marry a woman whom he died
and left.
Previn went on with his life. His ex-wife went on
with her's.
Farrow has no life.

It is a given that in a few years, Brad Pitt, who
could be enticed from his wife, Jennifer Anniston,
will find a younger woman and dump Jolie.

Jolie will be in her deep forties. She will have
to spend her fortune on cosmetic surgery to
try to capture someone else, but she'll be too
old. She'll be that Hollywood joke...the older
woman who is used as the stepping stone to
a career.

Young Actors will pursue her, live with her, use
her contacts, and dump her.

In lesser celebrity circles, the man who marries
the O.W. is just as unfaithful to her as he is
to his wife, and keeps going back for replacements.

[patricias213]

When you meet a man, before you become involved
check out what he has told you yourself.

Find out where he lives, and with whom.
Just happen to drop by on a Sunday Afternoon
and you'll see his actually living conditions.

Do not get involved with a man whose house you
haven't been to uninvited.

This means, any reason he gives you why you
can't have his home number, his address, anything
that can pin him down, throw in the garbage.

Walk away.

Many women get involved with married men
because they are sold a bill of goods.

This bill of goods consists of pure lies about how
he feels. How he 'loves' you or doesn't love his
wife or how the marriage is over....CRAP.

Stay away from married men.
If you think a man is married, stay away.

Never be the Other Woman.
Other Women come second.

They come after the wife and the family.
They are outside frills. Like a cherry on
a desert.

You meet a man, he's married, tell him to
call you when his divorce is final.

Any excuse why he can't divorce his wife is CRAP.

Firstly, he doesn't give rat puke about his children.
How do I know?

Why is he wasting precious moments when he could
be with his beloved children banging his Mistress?

Think about it.

If he was concerned about his children he would
be with them. Not having sex with with you.

He couldn't care less about his kids.

Daddys come home from work as early as possible
to be with their kids. Daddys don't spend the evening
banging their gals so as to arrive home long after the
beloved children have gone to bed.

Any man that tries the 'I love my kids' story, start
walking.

Then there are those who can't leave their wives
because....

If his wife found out about you, she would leave him.
So that whole argument is CRAP.

I can fill this screen with a number of men who
'couldn't leave their wives' blah blah and the
wife finds out about the Other Woman, and files a
divorce so fast his head spins.

He doesn't want the divorce, trust me here. He
does not want his wife to divorce him because then
he'd be free to marry the Other Woman.

The last person in the world he would marry is the
Other Woman. And if she somehow forces him into
marriage, he'll be unfaithful on the honeymoon.

Most recently, a fifteen year marriage ended when
the wife had enough. She wasn't even thinking about
all the gals he'd screwed during the marriage, she was
just sick of his abuse.

So she, the woman he couldn't leave, threw him out.

Did he go to one of his many girlfriends?
Of course Not!
He went to his Mother.
And he dumped every single girlfriend.

He had told Miss Monday he loved her,
told Miss Tuesday he would divorce his wife
and marry her, told Miss Wednesday no woman
ever made him feel as good as she did...
....on to Miss Sunday....whom he couldn't live
without.

So why, when his wife divorced him did he dump
his 'Week?'

He didn't want any of them. They were just ego
builders. That his wife had thrown him out...(and
gotten everything) completely destroyed his ego.

He certainly couldn't prop out his smashed ego with
gals who'd have sex with a married man, and were
so stupid as to go year to year on his lies.

"I want a woman I can respect," he said with
fervour.

So while the Other Woman waits for her beloved
to divorce his wife, because of (fill in the blanks)
she should be preparing to be dumped when this
year's new models come off the assembly line.

I showed this post to a friend of mine who having an affair with a married man, to really help her not too judge her. She however thinks that no one understand what love is and she and the married dude is so in love and no one understands. Great post, thinking of it, it is so true.

[Stalked]

Do a background check

As a woman who was "the other woman" without knowing it, let me suggest a background check on everyone you go out with. Men lie, and we end up taking the brunt of the wife's rage. I am hiding from a stalker as I write this. TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY it may save you alot of heartache, not to mention your life.

Trust me... there are psycho wives out there willing to do YOU harm even if you didnt know he was married. HE is never totally held responsible. We "wh*res" must have paraded naked, threw them down on the ground and forced them to chase us, take us out, treat us well, and spend money on us...

DO A BACKGROUND CHECK even if you are sure he is unmarried!

[kaylar]

Stalked, You post should be in red and pinned.
So many wives think their poor widdle hubby was
captured by the wicked witch who offered him
candy, refusing to believe that he went out
there, on the prowl, and if it wasn't Mary, it
would be Abbey, and if it wasn't either, it would
be Joan, it would be anyone.

Yes, you'll have the Angelina Jolies who will
know a man is married and go after him because
he is married.

But you have to remember, that Brad Pitt
opened his own zipper.

The worst part is when you don't know he is
married, and don't check.

It is not impossible. As I said in earlier posts,
if you find out he lives at 123 Green Street, on
Sunday Afternoon, you stop at 123 Green Street.

You see kids, you ask them about their Daddy,
you see a woman you ask her about her husband.

If you don't see anyone, you ring the bell. YOu
see who answers. You don't get involved until
you are sure he at least lives alone.

If you don't do that, you make yourself available
for all sorts of unpleasantness, including a wife
who is very territorial.

[kaylar]

I showed this post to a friend of mine who having an affair with a married man, to really help her not too judge her. She however thinks that no one understand what love is and she and the married dude is so in love and no one understands. Great post, thinking of it, it is so true.

She is a victim. She's walking right into the fire, thinking she
won't get burnt. Her married man, like any actor, can play
a role.

He can prepare his speeches, his movements, and then, go
over to the OW, perform, and she'll do whatever it is he wants
her too.

He will tell her about 'love' blah blah blah then go home to
his wife. He might, if he has time, stop and tell his buddies
what he did and said, so they can get the vicarious pleasure
and know he is heap big stud.

When he dumps the OW she'll cry and moan about how much
he loves her and how his evil family is preventing him from
seeing her.

This crap goes on, (depending on how stupid the woman is)
anywhere from two weeks to two months, but I know one
that went on for a year.

The best part is when she has him in court and he sneers
at her as if she's a two dollar *****.