[kaylar]

Well I'm not that old.
I still ride a Yamaha 175 DT.

I think that 'trust with man' thing
has become quite prevalent. It's
quite ugly, don't you think?

In a way, it's like stealing a housebroken
dog. You are too lazy to go out and train
one, so you steal mine.

[LadyLane]

I totally agree. It makes us seem like we never truly leave adolesence, where we can never find the point where we look our sister's/best friend's/co-worker's/roomate's boyfriend/husband/recent ex-boyfriend/husband in the face and say, "You must be joking if you think I'd do that to her."

Its competitiveness at its highest degree. "He wants me MORE than he wants you." Apparently being wanted sexually is grounds for decimating bonded female relationships that usually mean much, much more.

Sad, sad, sad.

And I've done it when I was young with my friend. She dated literally everyone in the world and hated to lose an admirer. Sometimes she just briefly dated guys or sometimes it was something much more. She dated someone in briefly in high school that I then dated for five years starting in college, and I could never trust her alone with him. The minute I blinked she was in his personal space. Who was wrong? Me or her? I'll never figure it out.

And throughout our entire friendship, every time I confided a crush to her, she promptly went and slept with him. Sometimes she tried to keep it from me, sometimes not. So after more than a few years of this I started exacting my own revenge. It doesn't feel good now, but it did then. Unfortunately I think we've hurt each other equally, and its a shame we hurt each other at all.

She was (then) prettier and had much more self-esteem than I. I have come to think I wasn't so much a best friend as a booster for her, a wing-man of sorts. But oh, how things have changed.

And I have no problems leaving her alone with my husband. Ever.

[kaylar]

When I was fourteen, for the one summer, I went after
my friend's boyfriends.

I had to be in the house at nine pm. I couldn't date,
but just to have the boy ask me out, that was all I
needed to feel 'better than' whoever.

At the end of the summer, when school began, I was
completely out of that mindset. I had gotten
whatever 'self esteem' I needed, and then would
walk away from any man if I knew he was in any way
involved with anyone.

It is something you 'grow' out of, unless you have
a serious crisis with your self.

Many women do.

I can think of a fellow, perfectly ordinary, who
many years ago asked me to pretend to be his
girlfriend.

Just go with him to a function, and then he'd take
me home within two hours. Just pretend to be with
him.

At first I 'felt sorry' for him, after all, if you
can't find a date to a function and need to beg
your lawyer....

Anyway, the point was, when the females found
out he was 'with' a lawyer, well, they flocked him
as if he had turned into the most irresistable man
whoever lived.

And they fought over him, who would take him
away from the lawyer!

He told me this months later, and I did like a
what? That's still going on?

Ladylane, tell the truth, didn't you claim to have
crushes on boys you found odious, just to have
your friend sleep with them?

[LadyLane]

K - You should have charged your client. It was slightly akin to winning a case for him.

I wish I had had enough guile to dupe my friend! Oh, that would have been fun.

Unfortunately I didn't.

Still, she slept with guys that we both now find to be odious as adults, and she can't take back what she did.

The beauty of being a late bloomer is that you bloom with more wisdom than you would have had when you were younger. I was more selective and made less mistakes.

An unrequited crush, I can deny. Sex she can try to deny, but it physically happened.

Funny aside - our shop teacher (easy h.s. credit) coached a sport for the rival town after school. He took a shine to me and always wanted to set me up with a boy from that school who he really got along with, but he always had a girlfriend. His family owned several businesses and they had quite a bit of money.

My same friend knew specifically who this boy was. But she wasn't aware of what my teacher had wanted to do.

The summer after freshman year of college, at a bar, I see her fluffing her hair and putting on her "come hither" look to some preppy dark-haired boy. I asked who was in her sights. She just walked up to him and started talking to him, introducing herself, etc.

When he mentioned his name, I couldn't help but be floored - it was the shop teacher's "intended" - and when I said my name, he was just as floored. We told my friend the story, and she was anything but amused. He then turned his full attention on me.

When we went to the ladies' a little later, she began screaming at me about how he had a girlfriend and I should lay off him because I was making a fool of myself.

I simply said, but it was okay when you wanted him. She screamed at me some more and slammed out of the bathroom.

We dated for four months. He was the worst kisser I ever encountered, and if I could have gotten past that, he would have been the perfect boyfriend.

[C]

Sorry Kaylar, I was wrong again.....You are a woman too.....I was confused.....

[kaylar]

Wow
Exactly who or what did you think I was?

[C]

Wow
Exactly who or what did you think I was?

I am sorry but I thought you were a man. I tried to find out in your old posts but was not sure. Truly I never thought woman. I figured a maybe older gentleman lawyer from England who was very proper and I was trying to be respectful. I am so sorry I asked you your age because like you I am 39 and hot. As they say older women make good lovers.....and they do....Again for the second time, please forgive....C

[kaylar]

About me


I am an attorney at law in Jamaica.

[Gia]

Alienation of Affection Laws!

Hi Kaylar,

Alienation of Affecition movie: Lifetime T.V. movie from 1999 called "The Price of a Broken Heart"
Available on Blockbuster on Line and Netflix on line! MUST SEE!

If I ever were to become married again (I don't ever see that happening..due to trust issues with men!) I just don't and cannot trust them at this stage in my life) Anyway, if I ever did become remarried and I knew for a fact within a reasonable doubt that my husband was cheating, I would immediately hire a private investigator to therefore confirm infidelity. Not only would my husband be required in court to pay for the damages, but the "other woman" in the affair who knew that my husband was married and decided to pre-meditatively and sexually seductively contributed to the breaking up the marriage, I would sue her for:

"Alienation of Affection"

This Lifetime T.V. movie from 1999 called "The Price of a Broken Heart" "based upon a true legal landmark case starring Park Overall (plays the wife). She and her husband are happily married with children. Her husband becomes promoted to a CEO/VIP at the company with a fabulous salary and benefits package. All of a sudden, the secretary character begins to dress from the "plain average secretary type" to the stereotype of the "knockout, seductive "other woman". She begins to style her hair and make-up differently, wear very low cut and sexy clothes, and she pursues this happily married man,(she knows he is happily married )and she continues to destroy his marriage using her sexuality. She seductively uses her sexuality to get him to leave his wife for her!

The wife's attorney via discovery at a divorce hearing sues the "other woman" for "Alienation of Affection". The couple divorce and the Judgement Order??? I won't spoil this movie for you, this is a MUST see!!!

Unfortunately, "Alienation of Affection" does not exist in some states, however it is valid in other states...So family attorneys out there, please set a precedent in your state and initiate "Alienation of Affection" to protect these injured spouses! The "other women" will think twice before she tries to pursue a happily married man!

Perhaps, If I ever re-marry, I will marry in a state in which "Alienation of Affection" exists as an extra security blanket within my marriage! (LOL). Apparently,"Alienation of Affection" does not exist in my state, however it exists in Southern states of the U.S.A.

[kaylar]

Old time


Alienation of Affection is a very old Victorian concept
which most parts of the world have abolished.

In my jurisdiction the term; "Slavery was Abolished"
tends to suffice.

One can not force anyone to love them or stay with
them, or not be unfaithful. The only person you can
control is you.

Everyone marries with this idea of fidelity, but it
depends on the people involved and the society
and the ******ity quotient.

For example, the secretary is dressing like a ****
to attract boss. Now boss must know that she's
trying to seduce him. Say he's oblivious until
she backs him up in the file room.

If he's not interested he might just give her a
box in her face, or fire her. So he is interested.

He wants to be 'not responsible' so 'allows' himself
to be seduced.

Too many women see their man as a little boy and
a wicked witch has lured him with candy.

That's not true.
No man can be seduced who doesn't want to be.