[chaya]

My husband has been gone for 2 weeks. He went to Michigan with his mother because his Aunt was dying. He flew back with his mother and is driving home today.

While he was gone I have been sleeping with Kiyomi, she is a lesbian. I know I can't live with the guilt so I decided to tell him. I don't know how he will take it or what he will do. I'm prepared for the worst, which could mean a divorce. I still love him and I love Kiyomi too, so what ever happens will be devastating for me. Kiyome has been getting ready to pack up, she thinks she or both of us will have to leave. I can't think that far ahead, I'll just wait and see what happens with I tell him.

[DreamP346]

Good luck chaya. I will be thinking about you tonight.

[Baboy]

Hey chaya,

You're not asking for input or advice, so I'll offer none. I have no particularly brilliant insights to impart in any event.

I have read some of your past posts about your situation, so I'll simply join with sp346 in wishing you luck. You have some WH friends who care.

- b

[Stillness]

chaya, I also wish you well and think you're doing the right thing telling him. My hope is that he will see how he was neglecting your needs and you'll work on that together.

I've told you before about my concerns with telling him - that he'll become violent. I hope you're very careful. I wish that you could be in a position where you weren't alone, like at a quiet corner in a restaurant. Being in public is probably not the most conducive to your relationship, though. Maybe you could have yourself prepared to flee quickly if you need to - like having the keys on you, your shoes on, and your car not blocked in. If you're ready and I'm wrong, then you've lost nothing.

Please let us know how it goes.

[Patti-here]

My husband has been gone for 2 weeks. He went to Michigan with his mother because his Aunt was dying. He flew back with his mother and is driving home today.

While he was gone I have been sleeping with Kiyomi, she is a lesbian. I know I can't live with the guilt so I decided to tell him. I don't know how he will take it or what he will do. I'm prepared for the worst, which could mean a divorce. I still love him and I love Kiyomi too, so what ever happens will be devastating for me. Kiyome has been getting ready to pack up, she thinks she or both of us will have to leave. I can't think that far ahead, I'll just wait and see what happens with I tell him.

Ooh sweetie, have things gotten that bad ?? Look, you know I'm always in your corner, if you need an ear, or a shoulder, you know where I'm at.

All my respect and affection.

Patti.

[atskitty2]

Thinking of you chaya.
I think stillness is right. Have an overnight bag ready and have a plan to make an exit quickly if needed.

[jen1447]

In your corner here too hon. Be strong and don't waiver on what you want out of life.

[chaya]

Kiyomi was trying to talk me out of telling him but I must get this settled. She took my car and Misako and went to my aunts house. Kiyomi was afraid for herself and Misako, I don't think he will get violent. If he does, I deserve it. I'm not afraid to die, I just worry about Misako if it happens.

One thing, he is sure to be very horny, 2 weeks with no sex, should I sleep with him before I tell him? He might be in a better mood that way.

[atskitty2]

Um, I would say no to that...sleeping with him prior to breaking the news. Sure he may be more relaxed but it may make the betrayal even more pronounced in his mind.

[Patti-here]

Kiyomi was trying to talk me out of telling him but I must get this settled. She took my car and Misako and went to my aunts house. Kiyomi was afraid for herself and Misako, I don't think he will get violent. If he does, I deserve it. I'm not afraid to die, I just worry about Misako if it happens.

One thing, he is sure to be very horny, 2 weeks with no sex, should I sleep with him before I tell him? He might be in a better mood that way.

No you just tell him straight up, you've found satisfaction in the arms of another woman, the kind that he couldn't give you..

Be strong, be determined, stand your ground girl !