[ChelseaRenee]

All ppl are different. Don't insist on it. Give him some time. Try to understand that when somebody does something in bed he doesn't want it is a perversion.

Except that he "insists" she does it to him. If he doesn't like doing it, she shouldn't have to do it either. It goes both ways. He shouldn't get off that easy, no pun intended.

[misstified]

I'd get rid of him quick - or find a part-time girlfriend?

[crzyredhead21]

Wow.... I know exacty how you feel. I am with a selfish egostisical man ho has gone down on me I'd say once in the last 2 months... and I've never orgasmed from it... or from him actually if I may be blunt.

[ami]

I have the same problem with my girlfreind who doesn't want to give me BJ. She told me she doesn't like giving BJ. On the contrary I love giving her oral. I do oral to her almost everytime we do foreplay and she loves it very much. I tried 69 but it didn't work. I don't know what to do.

[Livelaughlove]

I have the same problem with my girlfreind who doesn't want to give me BJ. She told me she doesn't like giving BJ. On the contrary I love giving her oral. I do oral to her almost everytime we do foreplay and she loves it very much. I tried 69 but it didn't work. I don't know what to do.

Its sad to see these kind of relationships actually exist.

In both cases there is too much control on one side of the relationship.

Live laugh and love

[2morrow]

Boyfriend refuses to perform oral sex

I feel your frustration. I also have a sweetie, who wont reciprocate either. We have been seeing each other for a year, he receives awesome, curl your toes B J's from myself, but he will not give back. He will look at my vagina, from about a foot away, he will stick a finger in now and then, he will have intercourse, but will not give oral. Just won't do it. I am very clean, I don't have hygiene issues, so what is the deal ?

How could you not want to give back? I just don't get it either.. I thought maybe he was shy, or didn't know how. But we are both from long term marriages, surely he must know his way around a woman's parts by now ! He has received many orgasms from me either orally or thru intecourse. I haven't had one ! Isn't life grand !! And the saddest part of all, he doesn't care that I don't. I am breaking up with him, and its for this reason alone. Some people say, it shouldn't matter, but it does. BIG TIME !

I think I am worth it.

[rcoreyus]

2morrow: He sounds very selfish. Find someone who gets as much pleasure out of doing nice things to you, as you get for doing nice things for them.

[latte_lover]

My boyfriend had OCD and he still went for it. The only link I can see to OCD and oral sex might be hygiene. I don't mean to sound blunt or rude by saying this, but if you aren't shaved, try shaving and keeping wet-wipes nearby to make sure you are very clean and tidy. He might be too afraid to ask you to do that. I hate how rude this suggestion sounds. You are definitely not the problem here.

[Phoebee]

I said this before but - No oral sex??? Yikes, that is a deal breaker for me. My DH confided to me that hygene is very very important to him and I suspect most men. If we shower together its almost unheard of him not doing oral sex. However I got into the habit of showering in the morning and suddenly I was looking at the Non Oral Sex zone. When I got it out of him it was one of those DUH moments.

He made a comment that at the time kind of annoyed me but I think there is some truth to it. He said who it is more important to be squeaky clean for. The people I go to work with or the man with his mouth clamped to my vag? ;-) Ok, he is not a poet but I do "get" what he is saying.

[AlwaysLearning]

If he legitimately has OCD it does make sense, however, since he had another reason when you first started dating him it doesn't make sense to say he won't now because of OCD. If he thinks you're being spiteful because you won't give head when he's unwilling to reciprocate than you need to move on. He can't tell you you're spiteful and behave the way he does, it's immature.

If you really love him or really enjoy being with him, weigh he pros and cons. If he goes above and beyond in everything but giving oral sex then perhaps you can learn to enjoy something else he does sexually. If he's self-centered and doesn't do anything except expect you to do all the work in the relationship, then move on.