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  • Mitchel1870
    Member
    • Nov 2009
    • 52

    SFDad maybe correct "he will likely be obsessed with it the whole time" as I am. Even after 15+ years it is a something I think about constantly. I love my wife dearly and will always but this continues to be an issue for me. If you don't really want to do it, be honest with the other person upfront. Maybe it is a big deal for him and maybe it is not. Honesty is the hard way but the best way in the long run.

    Comment

    • rcoreyus
      Veteran Member
      • Sep 2007
      • 4369

      I will agree with the previous poster that this is very important to some men. You really don't want to find he cheated some day just for this.

      Comment

      • StillLearnin
        Veteran Member
        • Oct 2009
        • 260

        I've seen on this thread several times: "you shouldn't do what you don't want to do."

        But may I suggest to any woman (or anybody that has a partner that they want to keep) that you should give it a try for a while to see how it goes. After you get over the initial awkwardness and you learn the techniques how to do whatever, and learn that it's not as disgusting as you have always thought, you might actually grow to like it.

        It could save your relationship.

        Comment

        • rcoreyus
          Veteran Member
          • Sep 2007
          • 4369

          "you shouldn't do what you don't want to do" is certainly true. Just remember that it includes that you shouldn't feel you need to stay in a relationship where you are not getting something you want.

          Comment

          • StillLearnin
            Veteran Member
            • Oct 2009
            • 260

            Very true.

            If the relationship is worth keeping, both parties need to work on the issue. Compromises need to be made by both. Perhaps the BJ isn't has important to him in the grand scheme of things (e.g. everything else, including the sex, is great).

            For her everything else could be great and he's a wonderful man. Wouldn't it be worth it for her to at least give it a try for a while because she loves him and wants to make him happy?

            As long as he's not asking her to do anything weird, like S&M or beastiality (I know, weirdness is in the eye of the beholder), she should give it a try. And he should be more understanding of her reasons why she doesn't want to.

            It works both ways. Both parties in the relationship should try to work it out, if the relationship is worth keeping.

            Comment

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