[AlleyWay]

Sometimes I just think that a persons past kind of lets's yu know what their future may be like in a way. But I guess if you focus on the future everything will be okay because no one's perfect.

[mdraven380]

I must really be different from the norm here.
It does bother me if my significant other has been with a lot of women before me.
I feel like I have to live up to all he's had in the past.
I don't have a SO right now so I guess I don't have to worry right now.
But I usually do ask when I'm with someone.
A few guys including my most recent ex refused to answer when I asked how many they had in the past.
Other boast about it.
It makes me feel like either way.

[Steph33]

Doesn't matter at all. I had more partners than him.

He only cares about from us forward, same with me.

We're both the best for each other we've had, so past actually helped to know what we do and don't want in a partner.

[WildChild]

It's not really a question of how many, or what went wrong. It's what did you learn? Have you moved not just on (although that's important) but upward, to better understanding?

[Texasred]

...Even now he seems to believe that I'm the only female on the planet that doesn't care for anal...

You're not, and don't let him make you think you are.

[Texasred]

But I usually do ask when I'm with someone.
A few guys including my most recent ex refused to answer when I asked how many they had in the past.
Other boast about it.
It makes me feel like either way.

I'm thinking you left a word out there, and I'm curious as to what it is.

I've had several partners, and never cared to know how many they'd had before me, but I learned more from the experienced ones, and I never hesitated when they would ask me to try something different.
One lover was several years older than me, 10 or 12 years at least, she refused to say! - and she was the most frank about what she wanted.
And I was happy to oblige!

[Steph33]

Not at all , My wife had 4 partners before me . Only one was a one night stand . When we were datig she discussed the relationships I had only her as a partner . She has said several times that she wished that I was her first also . If anything that is the only thing that bothers me is that I wishe I was her first . I do not sit around and dwell on this as there is absolutely nothing good that can come from reliving her past with others in my honest opinion. My $.02..lee

I wouldn't want to be his first, couldn't be as how I am, like, don't like, had to be found out. Could never do all that and decide with a single person and hope what is liked or not is exactly the same with the other. So being happy should cancel your not being #1.

[Miya]

It doesn't bother me in the least. I was a virgin when I married and knew my husband had been with 3 other women. In the end, he and I chose each other and nobody else. He never talks about them and really I'd never have a reason to feel bad or compare myself. I am who I am. At least one of us had some experience so it made it much easier for me.

[GlitterAndStuds]

It doesn't bother me and I'd rather not know anyway. I do know that I've had much more than he has (makes me look great, huh? ) but it's like everyone else said, past is past. I was always in super serious relationships up until a couple of years ago so I wanted to "sow my wild oats" if you will. I'm past that stage now, of course.

All that matters to me is that the best sex we've ever had is with each other, and we're quite enjoying it!

[Little]

It doesn't bother me ... I think my number is twice his, and I don't think my past bothers him either.
It would probably bother me if he had ONE partner before me more than five or fifteen. When the numbers get bigger, you're looking at a more general pool of comparison. In fact, I was my most recent ex's second partner (and he was mine, though I didn't have many encounters with the first to compare) and every move I made was compared to her. It was funny when I "didn't ____ like a dead fish," but when I was "only in the relationship for sex like she was," it wasn't cool anymore.
I don't think I would want to have a mutual first with anyone, or marry a virgin. I wouldn't want to have to deal with any possible "what is sex like with other people" questions.