[kaylar]

Forest for the Trees


Everytime this issue comes up, I always try to give
a non bedroom analogy. I do this so that it moves
from being a debate on the merits of oral sex to
the general feature.

zwendi likes it. Fine.
She does it, it is her choice.
Fine.

There are women who like to go hunting.
They will kill and skin animals without the
slightest blink.

There are others who hate the idea of hunting,
who can't bear to see a dead animal. Nor could
physically sit down and skin it.

For those who love hunting, it's no biggie to skin
an animal. For those who don't it is virtually
vomit time.

Relationships can not be a constant struggle to
'keep' a man. To continuely 'work' to find new
and novel ways to 'please' him.

That is not a relationship. That is slavery. Be a
good slave and he won't sell you.

I ask; what is his role in 'keeping' a woman? Does
he continuely 'work' to find new and novel ways
to 'please' her?

Men are not such priceless commodities that a
woman has to strive every waking moment to
keep him.

Once a relationship, whether husband, coworker,
friend, becomes a job, it is no longer worth the
effort.

[Guest]

Wow, "Zwendi does it...fine" It does NOT sound fine to you. Giving great oral and swallowing - skinning dead animals is the best analogy out there? Maybe some of you have deadbeat husbands but mine IS a keeper who reciprocates with joy in every aspect of lovemaking. If this situation is too much for some of you to handle just because you have not found a man who knows what he is doing - but wants it all in return - has made you bitter I guess. as for me, I am going to have an orgasm next time I have sex GUARANTEED - and I'll happily swallow every drop - no apologies. I am a confident, successful WOMAN, not a slave!

[kaylar]

There is no reason for you to be defensive, zwendi.
The post I made does not in any way make a judgement
against you and what you chose to do.

That you enjoy swallowing 'every drop', is your choice.

[nymphetamine]

Just wondering.. does anyone have any tricks to avoid the gag affect? Haha, or is it something you have to practice? Because I usually want to go deeper to please the guy, but I hate gagging, and I find it sort of embarassing. Does anyone else find that too?
Also, the guy I'm seeing, of course likes when a girl goes down on him, but it seems like I'm just giving him another ordinary blow job. Do you guys have any tricks to make it mind blowing? (no pun intended)

[patricias213]

Wow, "Zwendi does it...fine" It does NOT sound fine to you. Giving great oral and swallowing - skinning dead animals is the best analogy out there? Maybe some of you have deadbeat husbands but mine IS a keeper who reciprocates with joy in every aspect of lovemaking. If this situation is too much for some of you to handle just because you have not found a man who knows what he is doing - but wants it all in return - has made you bitter I guess. as for me, I am going to have an orgasm next time I have sex GUARANTEED - and I'll happily swallow every drop - no apologies. I am a confident, successful WOMAN, not a slave!

I think kaylar was simply trying to say that not ALL women likes to swallow where as some do. in your case u do, which is good for you. Everyone is different, i personally dont like to swallow, that doesnt make my husband deadbeat or makes me bitter or anyone else who posted here for that matter.

[reesecup]

I don't understand why when the subject of oral sex comes up on this site, there is so much debate and bitterness. As to address the original thread, not all women swallow; I have swallowed, but my normal protocol is to let my husband cum in my mouth and then afterwards, spit it out. I have realized that the "taste" is dependent upon your significant other's diet. If you have thought about swallowing, but it is the taste that makes you gag, there are different foods that he may eat that will alter the taste significantly. As for the thought of vomitting if you did swallow, don't do it. I too, had that initial feeling, even gagging because he would cum so much, but I tried swallowing just a little and let the rest run out of my mouth. That seemed to excite him!

While your husband may have stated that you are doing it incorrectly, I think he may just want to add a little more excitement and that is one way he can think of doing it. By doing this doesn't make you a slave to his wishes. You have the will to say no; but just as a child will pout when he doesn't get his way, so will your husband. Both survive.

[kaylar]

choices


This is one of those topics which can only really
be discussed in anonyminity.

I agree with you in the statement;

I don't understand why when the subject of oral sex comes up on this site, there is so much debate and bitterness

but I've found this consistent over the past ten or so years.

There are women who do, women who don't.
Women who swallow, women who don't.

The choice completely left up to the woman,
is the issue.

What happens in your bedroom is your decision.
When it is not your decision, then there is another
issue which is vital to explore.

It should not bring out the defensive nature of
a poster, or reflect bitterness...which I don't
precisely see here.

One of the things that I would mention, and
your dentist is the best person to confirm this,
is that some people have very shallow mouths...
(I forget the exact terminology) in which the space
between the back of the throat and the lips is only
perhaps two inches, so that a patient will gag
when the bit of tape is put in to xray the back
teeth.

Some dentists have to use children's tape, or
cut the tape, because the 'normal' size causes
the person to gag as it touches the back of
the throat.

It is a physical thing, it has nothing to do with
sex qua sex, it is a physical thing.

Also the consistency of ejaculate is similiar
to egg white, and many people will throw up
if they swallow a raw egg...

This again, has nothing to do with these
issues of sexuality.

[Guest]

I definitely agree with reesecup in this matter. It's your decision whether you want to spit or swallow. If you don't want to (or can't) swallow there are different ways you can spice up oral sex. Besides having the cum drip out of your mouth (which my boyfriend is a big fan of), what about having him cum on your face, breasts, or butt? Do what your comfortable with.

[Guest]

I usually draw the line at swallowing, because... ew. Sometimes, it's nice, but most of the time, I'd rather spit. But I'll never do it for being pressured to.

Whenever I've felt I'm being pressured to swallow, I just laugh and tell him that the consumption of human protein is canniballism! And that if he wants to put his favorite body part into the mouth of a cannibal, then he is welcome to it! Then I gnash my teeth

I usually get a laugh or two out of this one, plus it doesn't hurt anyone's feelings. But the special bonus is that it diminishes the power play of to-swallow-or-not-to-swallow, so that I actually do get to pick if I want to or not.

[Guest]

I guess I'm in the middle on this one. I'm a new member, but I am glad I found this site and just had to chime in here...

I have been married for 19 years, and am 37 years old. Early on I did feel pressured into "swallowing". Sometimes I still do, however, I do it for him! Sometimes we just have to do things we don't like to do, but after a while you get used to it. I don't do it all of the time, just every so often. It makes him happy and in return I am happy. Sometimes you just have to put your own self pride and "gag relfex" aside for a while and push through.
A lot of you are probably going to disagree with me and possibly even get defensive about this but...I tend to think that the days of the internet and all of the pornography that is so readily available has desensitized sex. I think porn have given women the label of naturally being "****ty". These stupid porn actresses make it seem as if this is the "norm" for women's behavior etc. Just because men see it on porn and the women really seem to enjoy it and "they all do it', doesn't mean this is a reality!
Like I said, I have been married 19 years and the first 3/4 of our marriage often had porn involved. Since we have cut out the porn out of our lives (it has taken a while. not an immediate result) our sex lives our better than ever. Now he doesn't expect me to perform like the idiots he just saw on tv.

But seriously ladies, think about everything your man does for you? Ok, if it is all one sided none of this applies, however, the men usually tend to do things we would never dream of. Is swallowing just every once in a while that much to ask? I know it is a personal choice when it comes to oral sex and swallowing etc, however, it comes down to each of you satisfying the other. And if we don't keep them satisfied, someone else will.
And if you really want a "tip" on how to do it, keep it in DEEP at the back of your throat when he cums and kind of form a seal around it with your mouth. This way it just shoots down the back of your throat. If he just starts squirting you will most likley gag. Keep it deep and just let it go!