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  • Hopeless Dork
    Veteran Member
    • Dec 2008
    • 4255

    Originally posted by mylo99
    The answer is, "probably." If I masturbate to porn earlier in the day, then have sex with my SO later. It is very likely, but not guaranteed, that I am thinking of someone, or some activity, that I saw on the screen.
    This point and another someone mentioned yesterday about wanting to watch porn during oral sex for visual stimulation makes me wonder if some guys enjoy the idea of sex, more than actually having it themselves.

    Like prefer being voyeurs to participators. Watching someone else have sex being more visually stimulating than seeing their ownself in the act? Gosh and men think we are emotional basket cases... what a mess there.

    Its like they are having sex... but have to imagine other people having sex to enjoy the fact they are having it. My head spins.
    Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

    Comment

    • Aqemini1977
      Member
      • Feb 2010
      • 39

      Originally posted by Millania
      just for fun, I wonder if I will hear from any men

      If u watch porn on a certain day and you are making love to your wife/girlfriend that night

      Are you fantasizing about the porn u were watching earlier that day? Or concentrating fully on your wife?

      Thanks for any thoughts
      Millania
      (an insecure wife with a porn loving husband)
      Seeing as how me and my wife of 10 years have sex about once a month, the situation you describe is very rare but it has happened where I have watched porn in the morning and masterbated and later that night she initiated sex. My sex drive is relatively high so I have no problem having sex more than once in a day.

      I do not by practice imagine having intercourse with any porn star. Not to say that I don't sometimes imagine having sex with someone other than my wife b/c I do. I think all men have done it before. There are times when actually having sex with another woman is much more arousing than sleeping with someone you have slept with hundreds of times.

      I am not saying I love my wife any less but sometimes it is physcially impossible for me to have an orgasm without thinking of someone who is totally different from my wife. Other times just me and her is enough for me to orgasm. Normally if we are going at it for 20 or 30 mins, I can tell when she has had enough so I will visualize someone who I know will make me lose it immediatley. I would NEVER admit this to her...NEVER

      Me and my male freinds have this conversation all the time. About certain women, maybe in hollywood or some totally mind blowing girl at the gym, that we know we could only last a few pumps before we exploded. We call on these vivid memories often. It is just that Porn stars don't do it for me, mentally. Hope this helps.

      Your

      Comment

      • Aqemini1977
        Member
        • Feb 2010
        • 39

        Originally posted by Hopeless Dork
        This point and another someone mentioned yesterday about wanting to watch porn during oral sex for visual stimulation makes me wonder if some guys enjoy the idea of sex, more than actually having it themselves.

        Like prefer being voyeurs to participators. Watching someone else have sex being more visually stimulating than seeing their ownself in the act? Gosh and men think we are emotional basket cases... what a mess there.

        Its like they are having sex... but have to imagine other people having sex to enjoy the fact they are having it. My head spins.
        HD, I think I can clear this up for you. Alot of men, I mean alot. Love the idea of participating in orgies with totally beautiful women. Not to say they would necessary do it. I am one of those guys. Out of all the porn genres out there, orgies all beautiful ppl going at it is a very high turn on.

        So if a guy is actually having sex it is great but if throughout his 20 or 30 minute live session with his SO, he could peek over and see some other hot stuff going on, it just enhances all of his sexual senses. Kinda like a sex overload. "I am getting oral, hey look over there, this hot chick is receiving it doggy...I will try that next"

        Comment

        • Hopeless Dork
          Veteran Member
          • Dec 2008
          • 4255

          Originally posted by Aqemini1977
          HD, I think I can clear this up for you. Alot of men, I mean alot. Love the idea of participating in orgies with totally beautiful women. Not to say they would necessary do it. I am one of those guys. Out of all the porn genres out there, orgies all beautiful ppl going at it is a very high turn on.

          So if a guy is actually having sex it is great but if throughout his 20 or 30 minute live session with his SO, he could peek over and see some other hot stuff going on, it just enhances all of his sexual senses. Kinda like a sex overload. "I am getting oral, hey look over there, this hot chick is receiving it doggy...I will try that next"
          BLEAH.... seriously I am so fully disgusted with guys at this point. I really and truly am.
          Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

          Comment

          • Hopeless Dork
            Veteran Member
            • Dec 2008
            • 4255

            Originally posted by Aqemini1977
            Seeing as how me and my wife of 10 years have sex about once a month, the situation you describe is very rare but it has happened where I have watched porn in the morning and masterbated and later that night she initiated sex. My sex drive is relatively high so I have no problem having sex more than once in a day.

            I do not by practice imagine having intercourse with any porn star. Not to say that I don't sometimes imagine having sex with someone other than my wife b/c I do. I think all men have done it before. There are times when actually having sex with another woman is much more arousing than sleeping with someone you have slept with hundreds of times.

            I am not saying I love my wife any less but sometimes it is physcially impossible for me to have an orgasm without thinking of someone who is totally different from my wife. Other times just me and her is enough for me to orgasm. Normally if we are going at it for 20 or 30 mins, I can tell when she has had enough so I will visualize someone who I know will make me lose it immediatley. I would NEVER admit this to her...NEVER

            Me and my male freinds have this conversation all the time. About certain women, maybe in hollywood or some totally mind blowing girl at the gym, that we know we could only last a few pumps before we exploded. We call on these vivid memories often. It is just that Porn stars don't do it for me, mentally. Hope this helps.

            Your
            I seriously... am not exaggerating.. am sick to my stomach in reading this... sick... as in physically ill. Disgusted.

            You complain your wife doesn't give you enough sex... yet make it sound like she doesn't even need to be there. Like she is just an extended masturbation tool. Ugh. Thoroughly disgusted.
            Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

            Comment

            • Hopeless Dork
              Veteran Member
              • Dec 2008
              • 4255

              At least , at least at least, thank God in heavan that when I look up at my boyfriend during sex he is looking right back at me, or I would probably after reading your post never want to have sex with him ever again. I seriously haven't read a single thing on this forum, and there have been some doosies... that havent made me think less about a whole sex of a species than your last 2 comments.

              I see cat collecting in my future. If I ever get the feeling this is what the man I love is doing or having to call upon in order to ejaculate..when he is inside of me and I am tuned into every touch he gives me... that he's having to turn to a thought of some other chick or can't come -- I swear I am so just going to collect cats and invest in a quality dildo. Nothing is worth that. Nothing.

              Why do you even bother having sex with your wife? Why not just masturbate exclusively... its what you are essentially doing anyway.
              Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

              Comment

              • Aqemini1977
                Member
                • Feb 2010
                • 39

                HD,

                I totally understand your disgust/sickening feeling. Men and women are so different sexually (normally) it is hard for the other to understand what/why certain things arouse a man.

                Not to totally discredit your post but I don't really see my wife as an extension of masterbation. I have been married for 10 years and I have a daughter with this woman. I will love her for the rest of eternity. I have never felt this strongly about a person in my life. So I can safely say I love her with all my heart.

                I am going to say this with the utmost of respect. Generally speaking, Women could not fathom or stand to hear the honest to god truth about all subjects pertatining to sexaulity with men.

                Honestly, I am not sure if men could fathom or hear the honest truth from women as well. It would hurt very deeply if today my wife came home and said "Everytime we have sex I imagine you being Brad Pitt" or " I have been dying to tell you that your penis does nothing for me". But I will argue that after the initial shock, it would open a really vulnerable sexual dialogue that I wish all couples could enjoy.

                Comment

                • Hopeless Dork
                  Veteran Member
                  • Dec 2008
                  • 4255

                  Originally posted by Aqemini1977
                  HD,

                  I totally understand your disgust/sickening feeling. Men and women are so different sexually (normally) it is hard for the other to understand what/why certain things arouse a man.

                  Not to totally discredit your post but I don't really see my wife as an extension of masterbation. I have been married for 10 years and I have a daughter with this woman. I will love her for the rest of eternity. I have never felt this strongly about a person in my life. So I can safely say I love her with all my heart.

                  I am going to say this with the utmost of respect. Generally speaking, Women could not fathom or stand to hear the honest to god truth about all subjects pertatining to sexaulity with men.

                  Honestly, I am not sure if men could fathom or hear the honest truth from women as well. It would hurt very deeply if today my wife came home and said "Everytime we have sex I imagine you being Brad Pitt" or " I have been dying to tell you that your penis does nothing for me". But I will argue that after the initial shock, it would open a really vulnerable sexual dialogue that I wish all couples could enjoy.
                  If you are needing to fantasize about another woman in order to ejaculate... how is your wife not just a masturbation tool? She's basically providing a hole for you to poke in, this woman you love and respect, while you fantasize about some chick at the gym. If thats your idea of love and respect.. I feel sorry for your wife. Truly.
                  Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

                  Comment

                  • Hopeless Dork
                    Veteran Member
                    • Dec 2008
                    • 4255

                    And Question... what if you were having sex with that chick you saw at the gym that turned you on that your fantasizing about with your wife... would you then need to fantasize about the girl that you saw at the circle k in order to ejaculate with the girl fromthe gym? I don't get it. Do you not find your wife attractive enough? Is that the problem?
                    Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

                    Comment

                    • Aqemini1977
                      Member
                      • Feb 2010
                      • 39

                      Originally posted by Hopeless Dork
                      At least , at least at least, thank God in heavan that when I look up at my boyfriend during sex he is looking right back at me, or I would probably after reading your post never want to have sex with him ever again. I seriously haven't read a single thing on this forum, and there have been some doosies... that havent made me think less about a whole sex of a species than your last 2 comments.

                      I see cat collecting in my future. If I ever get the feeling this is what the man I love is doing or having to call upon in order to ejaculate..when he is inside of me and I am tuned into every touch he gives me... that he's having to turn to a thought of some other chick or can't come -- I swear I am so just going to collect cats and invest in a quality dildo. Nothing is worth that. Nothing.

                      Why do you even bother having sex with your wife? Why not just masturbate exclusively... its what you are essentially doing anyway.
                      HD,

                      No need to worry. Your BF would never tell you something as disgusting as this. I can tell from your tone that he has a pretty good perception of what is allowed and what is forbidden.

                      You see the point is to not think less about a species...but maybe to really appreciate the way men are satisfied and aroused. I kinda thought that is what women/men want.

                      The real reason you and so many other women are sick/disgusted and hateful at some of the things men do/think is b/c deep down you feel like you alone will never be enough to fully satisfy your man. The truth is very hurtful. Lies/deciet keep our sexual society in good order.

                      If men weren't sexually aroused by visual stimuli. There would be far less sexual problems in our society between the sexes. Think about it. Most men cheat or stray mentally b/c some beautiful woman has caught their attention. Most men have an insatiable appetite for beautiful women.

                      Comment

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