I think that the idea of you prefering to do it yourself rather than her doing it for you is bound to come up, this would probably be upsetting, this would make me angry. But at the same time some women including myself like to watch men please themselves for a while before I take over, so your wife may be one of these women.
Maybe just throw the idea at her, if she has a good sence of humour she might even laugh about it and you will get the 'Really?! Show me?!' excitment factor
Good Luck
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