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  • MissMeSha810
    Senior Member
    • Mar 2010
    • 169

    Originally posted by WildChild
    Speaking as an "oldester" on here, my take is that it has to do with several factors - all related. Look at all the negative imagery and language surrounding sexually active or proactive women. Then look at the attitude toward men with the same charateristics. The men are admired, the women are Ho's.

    Men's responses to sexually proactive women, are mixed, yeah they want it, but they don't generally really have any respect for a woman who wants and likes sex and is open about it. The madonna complex really comes into play. In a relationship men often find a woman who initiates sex, who expresses her needs and wants, as downright frightening. Some will curl up in a little ball in the corner, some get angry, others start engaging in passive aggressive behavior, they apparently start to feel very out of control in the relationship. They will make wild accusations, or tell the woman there is something wrong with her if she wants anything other than what he wants to do, the way he wants to do it. Some simply become impotent. Granted there are some men who are secure enough to accept and love it. I've never met any who could handle it and love and cherish a woman who actually likes and initiate sex, but I have heard stories of some.

    Bottom line, for either gender really, you get shut out, shut down, often enough, you learn not to ask, not to initiate.
    From this, which was stated earlier is maybe only be but one of the answers to your question
    And as I have stated earlier, some women only need to throw the slightest signal and wow, the sex games have begun. But also as Hopeless said, if she doesn't like it, she may not bother to initiate. Every person is different in their own right but if a woman does not speak on the subject at all, then that would further confirm Hopeless' comment.

    Comment

    • Guest

      Originally posted by Fallen1
      Once again I beg to differ.

      Just because it is your experience in these matters doesn't mean that is the way it is.

      And why is it if a woman wants sex all the time you label her as addicted?
      Ok, how many women wants sex literally 24/7? I just have a hard time believing that any person no matter what gender would like to have sex that often.

      Comment

      • MissMeSha810
        Senior Member
        • Mar 2010
        • 169

        Originally posted by FoxMulder
        Ok, how many women wants sex literally 24/7? I just have a hard time believing that any person no matter what gender would like to have sex that often.
        Come on now, lets be realistic. I still need to time to pee, poop, and take care of the kids!. In between getting everything else done and having a life, yes, sorry, that's what I like to do. I am a woman in my thirties and I love my sex life and my husband and I have sex as often as we want. Two to three times a day, yeah it's like that!. I don't have to initiate anything but he knows my movements and signals.

        If you are with someone, you need to be on the same page and in tune with each other's bodies, emotions and movements. The question is why is the person that you are with not initiating sex towards you?We can't answer that, We can only give our personal experiences and advice on the matter.

        Comment

        • Fallen1
          Veteran Member
          • Oct 2007
          • 1937

          Originally posted by FoxMulder
          Ok, how many women wants sex literally 24/7? I just have a hard time believing that any person no matter what gender would like to have sex that often.
          Really it's easy if you think about it. If your partner is unable to keep up with you aren't you always left wanting?

          I'll admit that 24/7 would be difficult. I at least need 10/15 minutes rest in between and as missmesha states above have other things to tend to so I guess 24/7 is a bit of a stretch but I am constantly in a "turned on" mood. All I have to do is look at my man and I'm ready to pounce.
          There is a method to my madness ........ I just haven't found it yet.

          Comment

          • CHANDLERS WISH
            • Mar 2008
            • 22440

            But why don't women want to admit their desires for sex? Why would any man want to be with a woman who can't even admit that she likes sex and never initiates sex?
            Because she learnt from the moment she learnt what sex was, that men, use women "initially" for exactly that and so she gets burnt.

            The only woman in my opinion that will admit she loves sex, all facets of it, and will initiate it, is one who is confident, in her relationship that she's not there (JUST)for sex, rather, loved and can be totally herself in every way she wants to.

            CW
            PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

            Comment

            • mdraven380
              Senior Member
              • Jul 2009
              • 180

              I almost always intitate sex.
              Seems like most of the guys that have been my bf's do not initiate and it makes me feel awful as if I'm not desirable.

              Comment

              • amaranthine
                Senior Member
                • Apr 2009
                • 118

                Women are raised differently than men. If you still have questions about why women may be unwilling to admit their desires for sex, take some time to read over ALL the responses here (not just some of them).

                I'm sure I'm not the only woman here who was taught as a girl by her mother to "save it for marriage", "make it special", and "never let a man talk you into it". Coupled with this is the age-old concept of "noble virginity". A woman is valued in society by her show of chastity. Initiating sex and admitting her desire to be less than chaste is essentially going against every grain she was ever taught as a little girl.
                It's harder for some women to break out of than others. How is that so hard to believe?
                sigpic

                Comment

                • MissMeSha810
                  Senior Member
                  • Mar 2010
                  • 169

                  Originally posted by amaranthine
                  Women are raised differently than men. If you still have questions about why women may be unwilling to admit their desires for sex, take some time to read over ALL the responses here (not just some of them).

                  I'm sure I'm not the only woman here who was taught as a girl by her mother to "save it for marriage", "make it special", and "never let a man talk you into it". Coupled with this is the age-old concept of "noble virginity". A woman is valued in society by her show of chastity. Initiating sex and admitting her desire to be less than chaste is essentially going against every grain she was ever taught as a little girl.
                  It's harder for some women to break out of than others. How is that so hard to believe?
                  Thank You, especially about READING OVER ALL OF THE RESPONSES. The answers are all here, lots of them to be exact.

                  Comment

                  • Guest

                    Originally posted by amaranthine
                    Women are raised differently than men. If you still have questions about why women may be unwilling to admit their desires for sex, take some time to read over ALL the responses here (not just some of them).

                    I'm sure I'm not the only woman here who was taught as a girl by her mother to "save it for marriage", "make it special", and "never let a man talk you into it". Coupled with this is the age-old concept of "noble virginity". A woman is valued in society by her show of chastity. Initiating sex and admitting her desire to be less than chaste is essentially going against every grain she was ever taught as a little girl.
                    It's harder for some women to break out of than others. How is that so hard to believe?
                    I get all that. I do however think that if youre married or in a long term relationship, none of that should matter. I wouldn't be able to live with a woman if she never initiated sex... This offcourse means I wouldn't be able to live with 99% of all women.

                    Comment

                    • CHANDLERS WISH
                      • Mar 2008
                      • 22440

                      This offcourse means I wouldn't be able to live with 99% of all women.
                      I almost always intitate sex.
                      I always have to initiate sex
                      All I have to do is look at my man and I'm ready to pounce.
                      I always inniciate,
                      But several women have already said on this thread and all over this board that their SO doesn't like it. Sorry to keep bringing that point to your attention but its one you keep missing.
                      And, I've only gone back to page 5, I'd be counting at least another 5 that said, "they innitiate sex"..

                      So your 99% assumption even though repeatedly the women here are telling you they do, you seem to have this belief that only 1% do... your not listening and I no longer see the point of this thread.

                      We've answered you over and over, so if you feel that it's 1% then it's either an age thing, as you won't tell us how old you are, or your listening to men, whom are not speaking the truth, or you personally haven't found a woman who will.

                      Rest assured, we've spoken collectively.. We do initiate sex, love to do so and it all balls down to the man we are with, if we don't.

                      So, I think it's time to come up with a new Thread Fox, as we're beating our head against a brick wall on this with you.

                      Unless you wish to take note of what the ladies are telling you and turn the thread as to "why" these women are Okay with initiating sex and get a better perspective on your thought pattern, which in turn, may help you see clearer.

                      Your call...

                      Or thread closed.

                      CW
                      PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

                      Comment

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