[Ryanl35]

Honestly, I think it would be pretty obvious if she was masturbating next to you. Unless she is very very discreet im pretty sure you can tell.. Its kind of hard to disguise an orgasm. also if your completely awake and paying a lot of attention to what shes doing you can tell... Its clear that you know. The question is whether or not she is doing it in her sleep...

I guess your right, she is really really discreet, and her orgasms are very discreet too but I guess that's what I am witnessing. Your right the question is whether she is alseep or not. Last night for example she was still doing it at 3:30 Am I woke up to it, she was on her back, me on my side away from her. When I slowly turned over to her she quickly threw the covers over her lower half and turned to me and asked if I was okay. If she was asleep she would not have reacted that quickly especially so coherently, eyes focused and vocal. I really think she is awake, and if that is true why at 3:30 is she still awake doing it, and that is after she said to me she was not in the mood. Oh goodness I sound so repetitive, sorry just really frustrated.

[Ashlee T.]

I really think you just need to lay it all out in the line. If not you're going to obsess over it in your mind, think up all kinds of things that may or may not be true, think up all kinds of ways you thinks she's feeling or reasons she has for doing it and you're going to drive yourself crazy.

It's all sort of like a game, sounds like. You know she's doing it (or at least I think you do), she knows she's doing it, she knows you know she's doing it, you know she knows you know......... but no one will lay it on the line.

I mean honestly, it's hard for me to imagine a woman doing it for as long as you say she does. I wish I knew her tricks. I could never achieve that in such silence with such little movement. Maybe she's found the perfect way to pleasure herself, thus has become somewhat addicted to it, as opposed to actual sex which may not bring her to that same level of pleasure. Men go through that all the time where they would rather masturbate than be with their wife cause its easier, quicker, and they know what they like. Not saying it's right......but it could be a possibility.

As with anything else, you could dwell on it until you're literally suffocated with it. Or, you could bring it up, be confident in what you know is occuring, and not take no for an answer until she's willing to discuss it.

[bubbles]

i can see after sex and shes not satisfied (meaning no orgasm ) turn to masterbation.

[bubbles]

but to think hes asleep and do it right beside him is something else. was she faking? is she really asleep? hmmm. I know when im asleep, i have dreams, some that i have no idea why i would dream SUCH a thing. and sometimes i do touch myself to orgasm but it only lasts seconds NOT A 1/2 HOUR!

[bubbles]

so whats the update?

[Ryanl35]

i can see after sex and shes not satisfied (meaning no orgasm ) turn to masterbation.

Definitely orgasm during sex that's why I was shocked.

[Ryanl35]

but to think hes asleep and do it right beside him is something else. was she faking? is she really asleep? hmmm. I know when im asleep, i have dreams, some that i have no idea why i would dream SUCH a thing. and sometimes i do touch myself to orgasm but it only lasts seconds NOT A 1/2 HOUR!

That's what puzzles me, sometimes it's right in the begining of going to sleep and sometimes it's literally all night (very strange)

[Ryanl35]

No update yet, will have to pick a time to talk with her about it again, and will let you all know out come, once again thanks for the thoughtful input.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Missing something... 3 times a week, she's experienced from trying alone, from that sex, intimacy 3 times a week, that she can gain huge pleasure.. but can't discuss it with you on how... so she does it alone.

CW

[Ryanl35]

Missing something... 3 times a week, she's experienced from trying alone, from that sex, intimacy 3 times a week, that she can gain huge pleasure.. but can't discuss it with you on how... so she does it alone.

CW

I completely understand where you are comming from, I just don't see the huge pleasure, if she has an orgasm it is very controlled, can't hear any really heavy breathing and only a slight shake at the climax so I don't see the huge benifit. I am still a little lost. I just have to bring it up again, I just don't want her to freak out again, I just can't take that, I love her and want her to be happy, I guess it just makes me feel sad that she is unwillingly to be honest with me that's all, I will get over this over time.