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  • WildChild
    Banned
    • Sep 2008
    • 14142

    Some men just can't handle emotional connection associated with sex. I suspect that with porn that is an increasing problem.

    Comment

    • FrostDominion
      Member
      • Dec 2010
      • 27

      Originally posted by btifulfrefly08
      We've talked and talked about it. He keeps saying that he's too tired but then he goes to masturbate. One night when we have sex, I'll wait 'til we're done and ask him if that is better than his hand and to answer me truthfully.
      That would probably be the thing to do if you have talked to him about it already. You also need to look him in the eye and call "bull puckey."

      Comment

      • Guest

        Originally posted by btifulfrefly08
        We've talked and talked about it. He keeps saying that he's too tired but then he goes to masturbate. One night when we have sex, I'll wait 'til we're done and ask him if that is better than his hand and to answer me truthfully.
        Ha, he better say it was better or he needs help..

        Side note, where are you at in NC, i grew up there , "Nags Head area"

        Comment

        • jns
          Assistant Admin
          • Mar 2010
          • 8398

          Originally posted by sidneyalive
          Ha, he better say it was better or he needs help..

          Side note, where are you at in NC, i grew up there , "Nags Head area"
          On the Outer Banks? I was at the seashore somewhere near there in the summer of 1976, when I was attending a summer program at ECU in Greenville. We went on a one day trip to the ocean near Fort Raleigh, if I remember correctly.
          I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
          ...
          Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

          From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

          Comment

          • Guest

            Originally posted by jns
            On the Outer Banks? I was at the seashore somewhere near there in the summer of 1976, when I was attending a summer program at ECU in Greenville. We went on a one day trip to the ocean near Fort Raleigh, if I remember correctly.
            Yup right along the outer banks...

            Comment

            • Aprildone
              Junior Member
              • Dec 2010
              • 1

              Ask your boyfriend when did he lose his virginity, if it was a little early then that would make him a sex addict if it was too late then that would make him addicted to masturbating if he was doing it up into the point when he met his first girl.And if it was at a decent age then that means the sex he has with you isn't too great.

              hope this helped.

              Comment

              • WildChild
                Banned
                • Sep 2008
                • 14142

                Originally posted by Aprildone
                Ask your boyfriend when did he lose his virginity, if it was a little early then that would make him a sex addict if it was too late then that would make him addicted to masturbating if he was doing it up into the point when he met his first girl.And if it was at a decent age then that means the sex he has with you isn't too great.

                hope this helped.
                This is a rather symplistic view given you don't know the people or the full situation.

                Comment

                • sallyskellington
                  Veteran Member
                  • Mar 2009
                  • 829

                  Have you asked if there is a different position he wants to try or if there is something in the porn he specifically likes?
                  If he offers you no answer other then he's tired and then goes and does his deed.. you may want to consider whether this is the right relationship for you.
                  But tell him how much it hurts you and let him know he is in jeopardy of going into waters that have no swimming back.
                  Dead animals don't equal fashion it equals cruelty

                  Comment

                  • WildChild
                    Banned
                    • Sep 2008
                    • 14142

                    Try changing it around on him. Tell him you think he should watch more porn and masterbate more. Then get out of the house and go have some fun with some gfs, sign up to take a class, get a new hobby or two, get yourself happy without him. How he responds will tell you whether you need to move on or not.
                    Set a time limit for yourself - you don't have to tell him, just know that if things don't change in X amount of time, you are out of there.

                    You need a man who interacts with you. If he prefers the screen and his hand, let him have them.
                    Alone.

                    Comment

                    • jenn89
                      Member
                      • Aug 2010
                      • 48

                      It could be that he just got used to porn and self-gratification before he was in a relationship with a real live girl. There are big differences . . . the porn is idealized and obviously not real-world, and by taking care of things himself he doesn't have anyone to please but himself, so all his sexual focus is/has been on himself. he can do it at any time of his own choosing in any way of his own choosing. having a real woman available may be something he isn't familiar/comfortable with. You need to tell him that getting comfortable with it is a major part of a relationship and that he needs to be considerate of your physical pleasure and your emotional/psychological happiness. try making a deal with him: for one month, the only sexual release /activity he will have will be with you. If he can't manage that, he either needs help or you need to consider breaking up with him. If you catch him violating the deal and lying about it, then definitely dump him.

                      Comment

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