[Lovemybabe]

It's really funny how people would "think" that whatever society says is right, lol. I agree with waya. But also men do have alot of sensitive spots on their bodies. But with a "society" type of mind, it would be hard to find those spots

[Lovemybabe]

Master bruh - for me since I am the OP... My wife yes would be using a strap on of course. But yes in a way your right the plastic is making the pleasure
But at the same time so is my wife. The connection is huge part for me. Knowing the love of my life is doing this makes it a big connection, to add to that knowing is also seeing her do it is a huge connection I feel. Knowing the trust we have to actually talk about it, be open about it is a whole part of this. The prostate orgasm is something alot of men won't experience in their lifetime. I'm thrilled about that I am experiencing this with my wife. It's not the same if you do it to your self. As I said before. For me. It's the whole scenario. But seeing, feeling my wife's hands, body and presence is just a connection that makes it over the top. I would absolutely not want a man to do this. It is NOT the same.

[Just My Thoughts]

Hello, I'm new to this forum and my husband of 20+ years enjoys anal stimulation and penetration. I only recently became aware of the extensive amount self stimulation of solo activities and degree of fascination with strap on sex with me being the penetrator ( of which has not happened, nor have I told him that I'm even open to it because I just can't go there, at least). I've been searching the net for months trying to come to terms with the entire idea or anal exploitation and mis-use of the body. It seems that a heck of allot of hetero men, and women too, enjoy this activity. It both surprises and sickens me, I've even started to avoid intimacy entirely which I desperately hate.
It's not something I want to do but on the otherhand I do want to please my husband as much as possible. We've ventured into trying devices that are not strapped on to me during foreplay but I end up sick and vomiting before anything "pleasureable" has a chance to happen for him. This has already changed the way I feel about him and not in a possitive way either. I do love him very much and wish I had the anatomy as well as the attitude to please him and make him happy but I'm starting to feel that my feelings, which are valid if only to me, are too strongly negative and won't ever change. He says that he can be happy the way it was before " you know what hit the fan" but I really don't believe that. The cat is out of the bag and no matter how far chase that cat, you'll never bag that cat again!
Lovemybabe, make sure your wife is ok with it an not just going along for your benefit. If she isn't really ok about it, you'll both suffer in ways you haven't even thought of. If she's truely ok about it then you should have no worries, just enjoyment and pleasure for you.
If anyone can help me change my attitude and feelings in a more positive manner, I'd appreciate it.

[Lovemybabe]

Hey. First, if your not comfortable about the idea then I would say don't force yourself. As he told you, he is fine the way things were. But if your at the point of vomiting then I would say it isn't for you. Some woman just can't. But on the positive side, it seems that your husband is a nice guy and doesn't make you do things you aren't comfortable with. It's not for everyone. I understand that you want to please him. But it is not at all pleasing knowing your wife isn't into it. If my wife wasn't into it then I wouldn't do it.

On that note, I had extensive talks with my wife to make sure she was ok with it and the idea of it plus if she was into it. I believe my wife what she tells me and she told me she was. But if I had any doubt that she wasn't into it then I would not make her do anything she didn't like or was into.

Hello, I'm new to this forum and my husband of 20+ years enjoys anal stimulation and penetration. I only recently became aware of the extensive amount self stimulation of solo activities and degree of fascination with strap on sex with me being the penetrator ( of which has not happened, nor have I told him that I'm even open to it because I just can't go there, at least). I've been searching the net for months trying to come to terms with the entire idea or anal exploitation and mis-use of the body. It seems that a heck of allot of hetero men, and women too, enjoy this activity. It both surprises and sickens me, I've even started to avoid intimacy entirely which I desperately hate.
It's not something I want to do but on the otherhand I do want to please my husband as much as possible. We've ventured into trying devices that are not strapped on to me during foreplay but I end up sick and vomiting before anything "pleasureable" has a chance to happen for him. This has already changed the way I feel about him and not in a possitive way either. I do love him very much and wish I had the anatomy as well as the attitude to please him and make him happy but I'm starting to feel that my feelings, which are valid if only to me, are too strongly negative and won't ever change. He says that he can be happy the way it was before " you know what hit the fan" but I really don't believe that. The cat is out of the bag and no matter how far chase that cat, you'll never bag that cat again!
Lovemybabe, make sure your wife is ok with it an not just going along for your benefit. If she isn't really ok about it, you'll both suffer in ways you haven't even thought of. If she's truely ok about it then you should have no worries, just enjoyment and pleasure for you.
If anyone can help me change my attitude and feelings in a more positive manner, I'd appreciate it.

[WildChild]

JustMyThoughts - Only can You change your attitude or feelings. Any idea why you react so strongly to this? Its one thing to not be into something or to dislike it, but becoming physically ill is a pretty strong reaction. It's not wrong to not want to do something but I don't understand why you would do it if you felt so very adverse.

I don't agree with you that you can't put the cat back in the bag, so to speak. You are dealing with a man, who says he is fine with it if you don't want to do this, why can't you trust that he is an adult, knows his own mind and fully capable of saying ,"been there, done that, not doing it again?" Men are not really mindless, hormone driven beings who cannot control themselves.
I don't want to hijack this thread, but:
Do you enjoy sex?
Are you orgasmic?
Does your husband pleasure you?
Do you masturbate?
Can you bring yourself to orgasm?

Hey. First, if your not comfortable about the idea then I would say don't force yourself. As he told you, he is fine the way things were. But if your at the point of vomiting then I would say it isn't for you. Some woman just can't. But on the positive side, it seems that your husband is a nice guy and doesn't make you do things you aren't comfortable with. It's not for everyone. I understand that you want to please him. But it is not at all pleasing knowing your wife isn't into it. If my wife wasn't into it then I wouldn't do it.

On that note, I had extensive talks with my wife to make sure she was ok with it and the idea of it plus if she was into it. I believe my wife what she tells me and she told me she was. But if I had any doubt that she wasn't into it then I would not make her do anything she didn't like or was into.

This is a peeve of mine and I bring it up because I believe that words reflect attitude although it may be hidden and this comes up a lot and I think it may be a factor in Justmythoughts' situation. It implies that men are entitled or able to "make" women do things sexually, or otherwise, whether they want to or not. Unfortunately many women accept this attitude as well.This can be so embedded in their thinking that the man just saying he wants to try something may be taken by the woman as meaning she is required to. Unless a couple is consciously role playing and have agreed that one will dominate sexually and they have agreed to their limits on this, there should never be one "making" the other do something. That fact that this slips into conversation so often, to me, show that it is a very real aspect of life for many women and men.

[waya]

Quite alright Waya say whats on your mind I invite the open convo
Societal norms dictate what everyone does rather they notice it or want to say its their "personality".
We decide our friends based on the norm, we choose our lovers as well.

Back to the who gay thing tho in the bedroom your man could want a threesome with another guy and he decides to give the guy a b/j your not thinking O he's just getting the guy involved your thinking he's gay..cause by societies norm that is a homosexual act despite the fact you just did it to the guy and it was straight.

Men's spots I must say im not expert in the field lol, but for the most part they might contribute to said genitals but really doubt they would send a guy over unlike some girls who can orgasm from just nipple play. Dont get me wrong not impossible but not to common

I would completely disagree that societal norms effect who I choose as a friend or a lover but it is somewhat true, just not in the way you are thinking. I only become friends with people who don't allow society or other people to dictate who they are and what they believe. Maybe the fact that pretty much all of my friends are social outcasts makes this a moot point, I don't know.

I fail to see how a man wanting his wife to pleasure him anally has anything to do with a man wanting a threesome involving another man.

You do realize it's highly uncommon for women to orgasm from nipple play alone, right? I know one woman who can on rare occasions and one man who can get within a hairsbreadth of an orgasm from it. edit

But it is a scientific fact that men can be physically aroused and orgasm from prostate stimulation. That does not make them gay.

[Just My Thoughts]

Thank you Lovemybabe and WildChild for your reply. I'm having computer problems and have typed responces a few times. I will respond to you Wildchild when I have more time.

[Master Bruh]

Hmm..I suppose since I did a lot of typing I would have a lot of reading to do in return..Ok ok Im going to try and get this all in.
Ok back to the OP Now you say your wife is giving you this connection and all that jazz then if its the connection that sends you over Im sure you've accomplished this through other sexual means which are neutral or more hetero to say. Theirs a lot of things one can do to create that said connection, you say you wouldnt want a man to do it but how would you know until you tried it out to see, why limit yourself to just the female touch why not have a threesome with your wife their and a guy penetrating you, more trust comfort talks all that jazz society says its not cool but hey if your going to go against go full force. Now soceity its perfect ooooo its so not but for the most part you can say your happy with the world you live in cause society has created that setting.

Waya- Your friends are the way they are because of society, against it or not they are molded with it rather it be in it or on the edge of it. Now unless they randomly ignore laws go take what they will and so forth their to conforming to the law just some admit it those in the center or those who are against it at the border thinking their outside of it. You mightve read above but I believe it was you who said why limit yourself. So why have something fake if you can have the real thing plus your wife if your only sticking to plastic your limiting your experience. Uncommon yes but for hetero men even more rare..(not including teen guys cause a pic of a nude girl could set them off lol), just like some girls cant orgasm through strictly vaginal but must have clit stimulation. Also Im positive I wouldnt want them to talk to me about if they like anal stimulation...not something you talk to the guys..well my friends about lol A gay man can make a man orgasm from anal stimulation as well so you wouldnt say he was gay if he orgasmed from the gay guys penis?

[waya]

I think the friends discussion would take up a lot of space on this thread. Feel free to pm me if you would like to discuss it further.

But he doesn't want to have sex with a man. You're totally missing that because you can't understand why he would want his wife to do that to him other than if he was gay. Maybe you could try just taking him at his word when he says he only wants to share this sexual intimacy with his wife. There are sexual proclivities out there that I don't understand at all but I try not to make assumptions about the people that engage in them for that very reason. I don't understand so I wouldn't know what I was talking about.

[rcoreyus]

Men (and women) definitely have lots of sensitive spots. They may not even know all of their own spots - so their partners would do well to spend some time looking for them ;-).

Hmm, even in my very limited experience I can say that men have more sensitive spots than just their genitals. And by sensitive spots I mean spots that really get them going, like nipples and anus. And I'm sorry but allowing societal norms to dictate what you think is ok and what is not seems a bit silly to me. Societal norms determine what is considered acceptable behavior within society but we're talking about what goes on in the private lives of two consenting adults. In this case, two ppl who love each other. I also don't understand why you assume 'it's the piece of plastic giving the pleasure not the woman.' Do you think when people have intercourse that it's only the penis giving the woman pleasure, not the man?

I'm not trying to attack you. Your view just seems rather limited.