[Motorguy]

I think either (or both) of these are possible. I am not in your boat ... I'm in that other boat you'd like to be in. Penetration feels great to me, not because of any special "spot" my husband might be hitting, but just overall. I do need to take serious time to achieve full penetration though - little by little, no matter how "warmed up" I am otherwise.

Something I do during penetration is visualize the tissues in my vagina filling with blood and the muscles closing in. I don't know when I started doing this, but it is a definite PLUS when it comes to feeling. It helps me control my pelvic muscles too. You might try this the next time you try out penetration. I don't know if it'll help, but I don't think it could hurt

It's important to remember that the vagina is just not as equipped for pleasure as the clitoris. The nerves aren't bundled together in anywhere near the same concentration. I've read in a few places that most of the vagina isn't even very sensitive - after the first inch or two, the number of nerves drops off significantly, probably in order to facilitate childbirth. Even over here in my boat, where penetrative sex is top notch, it doesn't take the place of clitoral stimulation, but it is a nice addition to it.

I hope somebody else can give you some more helpful advice, maybe some perspective from the same boat you're in, but I thought I'd throw the visualization out there

That's very true Little, most of the women's nerve ending of her vagina are within the first two inches of the opening. This is why some women get more pleasure from toy's a long with finger,oral play then they get with intercourse.

[Motorguy]

Rome wasn't built in a day. With a good partner that cares about you, you will finally achieve what you want to achieve, it will just take time. What did you two do after he stopped with the penetration? If you had some fun teasing or cuddling or such, this time will be a happy time in your memories.

Yes very true and well said JNS just takes time to get used to those pleasure.

[Magnetism]

When I first experienced clitoral stimulation, kissing, and breast stimulation as a teenager...It didn't take AWHILE to get used to the pleasure. The pleasure was instant. The same thing goes for giving blowjobs. Just hearing of the idea of a blowjob in 6th grade drove me crazy, even when I have never given one.

[Motorguy]

When I first experienced clitoral stimulation, kissing, and breast stimulation as a teenager...It didn't take AWHILE to get used to the pleasure. The pleasure was instant. The same thing goes for giving blowjobs. Just hearing of the idea of a blowjob in 6th grade drove me crazy, even when I have never given one.

You was talking about BJ's in the 6th grade wow. I mean the most I was thinking at 11 year old was kissing maybe feeling a little boob. But oral sex didn't even come into my knowledge till i was in the 8th grade.

[Magnetism]

You was talking about BJ's in the 6th grade wow. I mean the most I was thinking at 11 year old was kissing maybe feeling a little boob. But oral sex didn't even come into my knowledge till i was in the 8th grade.

Some girl told me about it.

[JonDoe]

Casual sex such as a bar hookup is about just having sex, not about any emotional experience or actually being involved with that person. Rarely, if ever, is the goal an orgasm for the woman unless she happens to be so aroused that it only takes little clitoral stimulation of the woman rubbing herself during sex to have that orgasm. Most of the time the casual encounter the guy is only concerned about getting off quickly regardless of whether the woman does...

Are you speaking from authority or just anecdotally as you have pointed out about other people's comments? I added the emphasis on the last sentence because I find this a rather callous statement that can be misleading and thus a disservice to young women reading this thread.

You are correct, casual sex is mostly about the physical enjoyment more so than any emotional bond. This part is true for both casual partners regardless of whether they are male-female, male-male or female-female, at least assuming they were strangers before this first encounter.

However, to so matter of factually state that "most guys are only concerned with getting off quickly regardless of if the women does" is at best your opinion and at worst a form of male bashing. Speaking anecdotally, I do care about the woman's pleasure on a casual hookup, as do most of my male friends. Young guys may not be as concerned because they are more likely to be inexperienced. Don't get me wrong, I not saying ALL guys care because some don't but I suspect many do care.

I'm also not concerned with getting off quickly in a casual encounter. I, and most of my male friends, receive much more pleasure during sex when the woman is also enjoying herself. Does she have to have an orgasm? No, it is not a requirement because that puts too much pressure on both of us. Am I going to try to help her get there? Absolutely! Not for my ego and not to keep score (I don't).

I'm curious why are women interested in casual sex, if as you state the goal is rarely, if ever, to achieve orgasm? Is she looking for a strong emotional bond from casual sex? If not, then what is her goal? To get the man off quickly? Please enlighten us.

[Magnetism]

Jon Doe-I've had "casual encounters" (sex without commitment being official) in the past for the sake of physical pleasure. Giving oral sex and having my body caressed/kissed is the most physically pleasurable thing for me. Unfortunately, I may unintentionally bonding with the person, b/c I really enjoy the chemistry.


As for getting off, I shut down and feel upset when someone is pushing me to have an orgasm. Enjoying someone's body and exploring them is the best part.

[Motorguy]

Some girl told me about it.

So was this young girl that active at 11 year old wow that way to young for that.That age playing jump rope not about BJ'S.

[Magnetism]

So was this young girl that active at 11 year old wow that way to young for that.That age playing jump rope not about BJ'S.

I hope not! It didn't register


On facebook, I was linked to an article on a website saying that "Women need to stop being over the top ****ty by saying they like blowjobs so much." This article was written by a man, but the website is known for being misogynistic.

[Lorioella]

I don't experience issues with a lack of vaginal stimulation, but for me, having a clitoris-stimulated orgasm before penetration makes me extremely sensitive. Perhaps that would enhance the feeling for you too.