This topic is closed.
X
X
Collapse
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • jns
    Assistant Admin
    • Mar 2010
    • 8398

    Originally posted by Magnetism
    I did have vaginal penetration for the first time in a year, and it still felt "raw" and slightly hurt. It was definitely tolerable and nowhere as excruciating as some other past experiences, but my partner told me to stop and how he didn't want to see me in pain. I'm at least glad the man I was with didn't make fun of me or think I was weird for not being able to fully go through intercourse. I've also heard that condoms can dry a woman out.

    I knew I wasn't aroused enough, but I still did it. I was just so eager to make penetration work. I find it frustrating when you don't always know how long it will take to get you ready. I couldn't achieve an orgasm last night, because that's usually the surefire way of me knowing when my body is ready to take in penetration. As time progresses, I have a feeling that my body will feel more comfortable with this person. Sometimes, the first few times of sex can be a little nerve-wrecking and guarded.
    Rome wasn't built in a day. With a good partner that cares about you, you will finally achieve what you want to achieve, it will just take time. What did you two do after he stopped with the penetration? If you had some fun teasing or cuddling or such, this time will be a happy time in your memories.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment

    • Magnetism
      Veteran Member
      • Jan 2009
      • 1060

      Originally posted by jns
      Rome wasn't built in a day. With a good partner that cares about you, you will finally achieve what you want to achieve, it will just take time. What did you two do after he stopped with the penetration? If you had some fun teasing or cuddling or such, this time will be a happy time in your memories.

      We did mostly oral and a few other sexual acts. He loved it, and I had a lot of fun too. He said not to worry about the penetration part and that it happens.

      The environment makes a huge difference. We weren't in the best environment.
      "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

      Comment

      • Magnetism
        Veteran Member
        • Jan 2009
        • 1060

        So, I think I know what the main culprit is when it comes painful sex or not being relaxed enough.

        CONDOMS.


        I tried intercourse without a condom just for a few minutes just to see how it felt(I know I didn't get pregnant), and it felt a lot easier. He was able to glide inside and I didn't have the same raw feeling that I do when condoms are used. Condoms were the only source of birth control that I used ever since I started having sex, so I'm going to have to look at other options. I'm wondering also whether the condoms are interfering with me fully being able to enjoy penetration. My female friends say that sex without a condom is much more pleasurable.
        "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

        Comment

        • DreamP346
          • Oct 2011
          • 2053

          Have you tried the female condom? It still isn't the same are direct skin contact, but you definitely don't get the raw feeling. Also, lots of lube, inside and outside the condom.
          Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

          Comment

          • Magnetism
            Veteran Member
            • Jan 2009
            • 1060

            Those female condoms look intimidating. Yes, I've had past experiences where condoms didn't hurt, but I would like to at least have normal penetration with this person for once. The penetration we've had lasts for a few minutes, because I know my muscles aren't fully relaxed and I have to say stop. Lube only helps me when I know I'm fully aroused and relaxed. Our intimacy has been consisting of oral sex mostly and a few other sexual acts.
            "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

            Comment

            • Magnetism
              Veteran Member
              • Jan 2009
              • 1060

              I'm not sure if it's a violation to bump this thread. When I made this thread, I was very naive and a poor judge of character. The guy I was trying to have successful intercourse with turned out to be a mean person. I can't believe that I was even making excuses for him or trying to make him feel good. I truly believe that's why my body was shutting him out. I have also accepted that my body is just built a certain way where it's more easily turned on by oral sex/clitoris/breast stimulation. When this thread was made , I was trying too hard and it just felt frustrating.
              "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

              Comment

              • effy2014
                Veteran Member
                • Apr 2014
                • 1777

                Since it was your thread, I don't think anyone will or should mind your reviving it. But I'm not sure what you would like us to focus on.

                To me, intercourse is just another form of romantic intimacy. Based on your prior posts, you are a giving lover and, if you are with the right man, he should be loving and patient enough to work through any issue. In my experience, when you know that the relationship is right, you will want to experience the feeling of him inside you, whether or not you orgasm.
                "The only consistent feature of all of your dissatisfying relationships is you." Despair.com "Dysfunction"

                Comment

                • Magnetism
                  Veteran Member
                  • Jan 2009
                  • 1060

                  I bumped up the thread to help other women realize that you might just be with the wrong guy, no matter how hard you try. Love, trust and patience help a lot!
                  "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

                  Comment

                  • Little
                    • Feb 2007
                    • 4329

                    I think plenty of people struggling with the same issues as you were will enjoy the update and find it useful
                    <center><i>Nature gives us shapeless shapes,<br>Clouds and waves and flame,<br>But human expectation is that love remains the same,<br>And when it doesn’t, we point our fingers and blame.</i><br><a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php">Register</a>|<a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/members/little.html">Contact Admin</a>|<a href="mailto:support*womens-health.com?subject=Forum Contact">Email Admin</a></center>

                    Comment

                    • Magnetism
                      Veteran Member
                      • Jan 2009
                      • 1060

                      It's funny to read this after a year! I have such a different perspective now. When you're in a situation, it's easy to get blinded.
                      "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"

                      Comment

                      or

                      Womens Health orange logoGet The Newsletter

                      Join our weekly newsletter and get the latest thought-provoking bold research and fearless conversations about sex - plus exclusive product giveaways - delivered to your inbox.

                      Latest Activity

                      Collapse

                      Latest Topics

                      Collapse

                      • PCOS and unwanted hair growth

                        Does anyone have any experience with PCOS and getting rid of unwanted facial hair? What started as one singular strand on my chin in my 20s has turned...

                        07-27-2026, 07:25 AM By Birdie_567
                      Working...