[confundida]

I'm really insecure about my body, and I don't really know how to handle it! Ok, I'm around 5'7", approximately 145 lbs, so I'm not fat but I'm also not skinny and pretty. Also most of my bodyweight is concentrated on my lower half, so my thighs are fat, and I'm very pear shaped What most gets to me is having small boobs on a medium, thick frame, with my big lower half my boobs look way small.

And my ex always made comments about my small boobs, sometimes jokingly but you could tell it was half and half, 50% joke, 50% seriously. He also always commented about other women's big boobs, I told him how it hurt but his skull was too thick to comprehend it seems. He would also make comments like "Wow your boobs look bigger on that top, how hot" which I hated because it reinforced that big = better.

I don't know what to do, I really despise my body now I feel disproportionate... I'm trying to lose weight and it's so slow, I practically eat only chicken and salad, and work out 5 days a week, and I've lost only about a pound maybe in a month... so painfully slow... and then there are always shorter, skinnier women with D cups! It's so unfair

Where I live the ideal is to be skinny with big boobs, and I've heard a lot of guy talk which is more discouraging because of course big = better, sexier, hotter, the best. And I guess I wouldn't care so much if men didn't give it so much importance, but the things I've heard them say, guys who're unattractive themselves saying how they wish their (very pretty) girlfriends had bigger boobs, or so and so has big boobs and they wish they could ******** them, etc. So I'm scared that all guys will be like my ex, just settling and not truly satisfied by what I have to offer

Everyone always says to stop caring about guys' opinions, but HOW????

[jns]

Find a guy who doesn't go along with that crowd. There are guys out there who like small boobs, I for one. There are also guys who like a big booty on a woman. Actually there are a lot of guys who like that. It's unfortunate you had an ex who liked to put you down, subtly and not so subtly. Don't let him win. Tell yourself every day that you are beautiful. When you start believing it, your confidence will attract a lot of guys.

[confundida]

Thanks for the support jns, I hope to find the rare guy who's not a follower, it seems that they're still too young but I'm sure if I find a guy who thinks for himself I'll cherish him because I'd love to find a guy who's secure enough in himself not to let himself be brainwashed by society.

[Stillness]

big = better, sexier, hotter, the best

Meh. I've been intimate enough with 4 women in my life to have them naked. One was very large-chested. Another big (one of the sexiest women I've ever seen). One average. One small (she had a behind that could steal a man's breath). They varied in height from taller than average to short. One was thicker. The others average. I married the smart one who loved God and me.

Also, the most beautiful pair was not the biggest or even the second biggest once their tops came off. Size is overrated. All the physical attributes are. A shallow man won't ever be satisfied no matter how pretty or shapely his woman is. A good guy will find satisfaction in a good woman and see beauty in her and she will know it.

[DreamP346]

Its time to find new friends. The men you are hanging around with are giving men in general a bad name. Trust me, not all men think like that. Everybody has different preferences and there is nothing wrong with that. Some men like big boobs, some like smaller perkier boobs, some like large areola, some like pink nipples, etc. Men are not all the same. They all like different things. I knew a guy who loved hairly legs on a woman. My husband says breast size doesn't matter to him, having a pretty face is more imporant. But even more important is having a great personality. A pretty girl is fun to look at for 5 minutes. But if she can't carry a conversation, it gets pretty boring.

and let me tell you, having big boobs is not that fun. I have a hard time finding clothes that fit correctly without either making me look like I'm wearing a potato sack or a hooker. The bigger they are, the saggier they are. Now after 2 kids, my D's look more like old socks. I can't wear strapless dresses, have to buy super expensive bras that you can't find in regular stores.

Everybody is different. Accept that fact and stop hanging around people that make you feel ugly. You are beautiful just the way you are . You are in a great weight and height that many women love to have.

[Hugo-B]

Firstly your ex is a tool. a few jokes about the size of his penis (and perhaps how he used it) wouldn't have been unnecessary IMO; and would have given him a taste of his own medicine.

Now that's out of the way: The most important thing here is that you learn to feel at peace with yourself (which includes feeling at peace with your body and learning to feel comfortable in it). This, of course is easier said than done and took me until my late twenties to achieve. My advice to you would be to learn as much as you can about healthy eating and exercise so you can safely reach your own (not anyone else's) optimum body-weight/body fat percentage. Also, hormone based birth control can affect your ability to lose fat so if you're on the estrogen pill maybe have a chat with your doctor. A girl here called 'It's a secret' is very knowledgeable (and helpful) on these matters and may be able to offer you some advice with regard to this if necessary.

The final option available if you're really unhappy about the size of your chest is a boob job. My ex had exactly the same problem as you and said her boob job was "the best thing she ever did". If having boobs on the smaller side is genuinely making you so unhappy then I would consider this a viable option. I may be accused of contradicting myself after what I said above, but if someone really is so unhappy about something that they can change (safely and relatively inexpensively) then I don;t see why they shouldn't do it. I'm not saying I think you should have it done, but I am saying if it is something that will make you exponentially happier then I would give it serious consideration. Whilst the body type you complain of doesn't bother me personally in all honesty I have heard a lot of girls complain about it. We've also seen on here how unhappy man boobs can make a man, and how unhappy not having big boobs can make a woman. Both conditions can make people miserable, and both are easily correctable by surgery, I wouldn't let a simple operation stand between me and my happiness.

Good luck, you'll be fine. And tell your ex I said he is a tool please :-)

[rcoreyus]

I think there are as many men who like small breasts as who like "emergency flotation devices". There are also many for whom it really doesn't matter one way or the other. All guys are NOT like your ex.

[Nholland]

What is generally considered the most attractive (as it equals being the most fertile) is actually the waist to hip ratio. Google it, its not just my opinion. Small waist w large hips n butt is very sexy. I have narrow hips, medium waist and large, nice boobs. But i would kill for a curvy lower half. Be proud

[Benni]

I am small breasted -- A cup -- and both my husbands and other boyfriends were, initially, attracted to me because of them. So, don't dwell on that. You are beautiful no matter your breast size.

[Obelisk]

And my ex always made comments about my small boobs, sometimes jokingly but you could tell it was half and half, 50% joke, 50% seriously. He also always commented about other women's big boobs, I told him how it hurt but his skull was too thick to comprehend it seems. He would also make comments like "Wow your boobs look bigger on that top, how hot" which I hated because it reinforced that big = better.

That guy is an acehole. Why would you joke about someone's insecurities like that? I'd feel hurt if a girl told me my penis was small, even if it was only joking.

There are guys who seem to be breast guys, other guys are "booty" guys. I'm more into symmetry. I don't care about size as long as it's proportional. I however would definitely not consider that to be high on my list if I had a girl that I got along great with.

Basically, some guys might care about your breast size, other guys (like me) ****won't**** care. Find a guy that doesn't care. You might even find a ****booty**** guy and you'll make his day by being his gf lol