[Mourningman]

You for got the part where you are thanked and she leaves. Kind of like a towel boy.

[mr.mansview]

carolineWH do you perchance write romance novels? i think you have a calling..

[rcoreyus]

Sadly, in my relationship, CarolineWH's fine (and well written) suggestion doesn't work. As soon as I go even a day without giving my wife little hugs and kisses she complains that I don't love her anymore. She wants to lie naked next to me in bed, kiss a bit, but anything more sexual and she is "too tired". if I do anything to reduce the occasional physical contact, she becomes upset.

If I try to explain that it is difficult to hug and cuddle her naked body when we haven't had sex in 2 months, she becomes apologetic, She'll try - just too tired right now....tears, neither of us sleeps that night. But a day later all that is forgotten, and we are back to the same situation. Hugs, kisses, but almost never sex.

It is not that she has no sexual interest. On those rare occasions when we do have sex, she usually orgasms (or fakes it very well - but I think it is real). She masturbates when I am out of town (she doesn't tell me, but the sex toys have moved).

Maybe she has someone else? Maybe it isn't a man?

But other than sex our lives together are fine. We have seen and done so many things together. But I don't want to live like a monk.

[mr.mansview]

No, for your information I have never written one thing in my life until about two years ago when I went to a Sexual Board trying to find out what was going on with me. I was ejaculating and did not know what was happening. What my husband and I are is what we have always been BUT I am madly in love with him as the day we married. NEVER wrote anything.

Second: After I answer these two posts and the one to Inquisitive which I promise I will, I am out of here. I realize that this place is for the young and that I am not. But Charley Browne, you have a whole lot to learn in life..... Do I have knowledge, perhaps in my post to Inquisitve, I will show some of this but that will be the end. I am now debating whether I will leave the top two posts on. I will probably take them off. Don't want anyone else to think I write romance novels. You my dear he/she are a class act.

I will not waste my breath and try to explain parts of life to you people when you play a game. I consider your comment "do I write romance novels" the lowest thing a person has ever said to me. And I promise you that it will never be said to me again here. I will not read another post from anyone here other than the OP. Because of my high sexuality, I talk to a wonderful Sex Therapist. She has helped me figure out what in the devil is going on with me. Her name in case you want to know is Dr. Patti Britton and she is President of the 2000 strong ASSECT for a two year period. My husband and I went down to St. Louis and had brunch with her last year. She will be a guest in our home next year. Next week she is at a big meeting in Indianapolis. We were going to get together but our schedules did not make this possible.

Guess this is enough said on this......

my apologies if i offended you "carolineWH"..i merely meant that you phrase things vividly..when i read you post i could picture what you were saying in my mind..it was meant as a compliment..so sorry if it came across as a flippant remark, that was not my intention..

[sourpuss]

No, for your information I have never written one thing in my life until about two years ago when I went to a Sexual Board trying to find out what was going on with me. I was ejaculating and did not know what was happening. What my husband and I are is what we have always been BUT I am madly in love with him as the day we married. NEVER wrote anything.

Second: After I answer these two posts and the one to Inquisitive which I promise I will, I am out of here. I realize that this place is for the young and that I am not. But Charley Browne, you have a whole lot to learn in life..... Do I have knowledge, perhaps in my post to Inquisitve, I will show some of this but that will be the end. I am now debating whether I will leave the top two posts on. I will probably take them off. Don't want anyone else to think I write romance novels. You my dear he/she are a class act.

I will not waste my breath and try to explain parts of life to you people when you play a game. I consider your comment "do I write romance novels" the lowest thing a person has ever said to me. And I promise you that it will never be said to me again here. I will not read another post from anyone here other than the OP. Because of my high sexuality, I talk to a wonderful Sex Therapist. She has helped me figure out what in the devil is going on with me. Her name in case you want to know is Dr. Patti Britton and she is President of the 2000 strong ASSECT for a two year period. My husband and I went down to St. Louis and had brunch with her last year. She will be a guest in our home next year. Next week she is at a big meeting in Indianapolis. We were going to get together but our schedules did not make this possible.

Guess this is enough said on this......

Whoa Caroline- are you ok?
I'm pretty sure that he meant it as a compliment. At least that's how I read it to be.
I think he just meant that you are a good writer and story teller.

[rcoreyus]

Then don't live like a monk. A woman can become her own favorite lover. She finds places in her vagina that a man can never find but she has to allow him in to find herself and give all of the inner woman she is. It was only when I completely allowed my husband to be part of me that I went to a place that I have never known before. I ejaculated and it changed all of me. I gave in to the inner woman and this she is hiding. Maybe she has another man. If she does, why stay? Stop kissing her a*s. She is running you. Whatever she says, you do. Tell her to suck an egg unless she will do you too. I am married to the neatest jock in the world and he would never take this from me nor would I have asked him to. During the time I was going with him and before we were engaged two other men asked me to marry them so I am far from an over the hill woman who does not know life but I know that she is sounding like a spoiled little brat and I would not take her sh*t...(Oh, what the hell, I am out of here anyway after Inquisitive post)

If she is playing you find it out and find yourself a lover like you deserve. If she loved you she would not make you hurt. My friend I leave you with all the best wishes sent to you through this computer.....Find happiness, don't waste your life away.....Find what we have....

If any woman read this I want to give you only one tip. Remember how much you loved him when you married him and if you still do, don't let him forget it. Remember the way that you held hands and loved before you were married, do it again. Don't let your yesterday die off. Keep it alive for today. Remember how you used to make love, keep doing it and go for more. Get rid of that ***** inside you that hold the inner self back and turn into his hot lover. Be his porn queen and make yourself happy. Nothing in sex is bad. The dirtier the better. They love it and if you dig deep enough in your mind, you do too. It is who all women are but they just keep remembering the Eve thing and biting the apple and running and hiding....

Take care,
Caroline

Inquisitive1 I will answer your post on the ejaculate and where it comes from and all that has happened to me but in very small detail over the weekend. Right now I want to cool off. If I am banned, than so be it.....TC, C

What you say is true - in a real sense she is using me, and I might well be better off without her. But she would not be better off without me. If she told me today that she had found someone else and was leaving me, I wouldn't shed a tear - or be at all angry. I don't know if she really still loves me, but I love her and will do what is best for her. (and yes, if I decide that leaving her is best for her - I will, but right now it isn't).

Yes I am a sucker. But I am bound by my love and my sense of duty. Even in the love faded, I take my duty to my wife seriously. "for better or for worse".

Long ago I sold my soul - but not my honor.

[rcoreyus]

My dear friend. After reading your post, I am sure that you were around when they made the mold for my husband. I say this because I see so much of the kindness and good he has in him reflected in you. Your wife is a lucky woman. She may realize this sooner than you think. As a woman ages she matures. Matures a whole lot. When she reaches her 30's those sexual hungers start really setting in. Now she is busy with a baby and they do take so much energy and worry.

No, you are not a sucker, you are a wonderful man. Take care of those babies and love them to death and still remember some of the things I said in the post. Lord, they sure work well on me only I get the full treatment..I try but I just can't make him stop... With all the qualities you possess as a husband and Father, I think you will do just fine.....you are truly something else.....Take care, Caroline

P.S. But you can always threaten her in a sexy way with messing around a little..She might even get jealous.... Did I say that!!..xox..

I appreciate that. But, I think you have 2 of us confused. We don't have kids (that is another whole story), are in our mid 40s, married >20 years. It gets very confusing with all the simliar stories - just clarifying to keep the confusion from spreading. All that aside, I do hope things will improve. We've had a tough year for other reasons - but that is another long story for some later time.

[rwms498]

i feel your pain, brother

wow, man, you are a mirror image of me. i've tried romance, i've made an appointment for councelling, that my wife cancelled, i bought a book that she would not read the title of. we have two kids as well, our youngest is 4. ive sent her for massages, sent flowers randomly,tried **** near everything.my wife still has no interest in sex.period.it aint fun when your wife pulls away telling you all you want is sex when you just go to hug her. good luck man

[rwms498]

#$** ,this is starting to look like a theme for this website..i put up a post a couple of days ago asking for advice about a situation pretty much like yours and a few others here...cheating was mentioned in a reply in each case, i think.i wonder,,this is just a theory,,are some women conditioned this way,,and know that their men won't cheet? i know i haven't,you have'nt and in most cases i've read here haven't...do these type of women know who or what type of man to choose for a mate? sounds out there but you never know. any thoughts???????

[Mourningman]

Well a dad I know left his family without any warning a month ago.This guy was the quintesential "regular" guy.Had a nice boat went fishing,bought dirtbikes and snowmobiles for him and the kids he was a nice regular guy just very quiet and didn't drink at all.But when he don't come home one day he is immediatley penned a jerk, an ***. but friends he's had don't know what when on at his house his bedroom they just point a finger and say they can't figure him and call him an odd duck.HUMPH. Remember he was a decent regular guy forever now his name is mud.Is it because he abandoned his kids? could be but why call him the odd duck. I guess he still sends money to suppoprt the home and who knows he may sort things out and go back only time will tell. I don't know what to think if it is possible to admire and be disgusted with someone at the same time what would that be? So what is worse being henpecked and run by the nose in a sexless marraige my friend I described who called the regular guy a jerk or like me who's wife is spiriling deeper and deeper into a funk 5 months of no income (real estate agent) hates sex with me and cannot put together a decent dinner meal with all the extra time she has (Now I am pileing on) I have been dealing with the no-sex thing for years but this other stuff thats going on is making me take 2 steps backward to take a good look at our lives and it aint good.