[metboogie]

Well, I gave it a try for the first time last night. Kind of felt odd to me "breaking the silence". I didn't really have a plan so to speak, I just opened my mouth and spoke. What prompted me to it was as we were in the act I started thinking how is he to know what feels good/what I want if I don't tell him. So I hesitantly opened my mouth and said (excuse the graphicness) deeper. And then the word harder came out of my mouth. After a minute or two I had the urge to say another - slower, but I kind of felt guilty because I didn't want him to feel like I was trying to run him through a triathlon, so I didn't say it.

I may not have spoken the words in a tone or manner that was sexy, or that even excited him. I just said them. But at least I broke the ice and maybe next time it won't feel so awkward to me.

Good for you!

Don't be worried about talking...you'll be OK...my question is this -

When you said deeper, harder - did he react accordingly? If he did, did you like it? If so, why stop talking? You are doing 2 things:

1 - You are teaching him EXACTLY what feels good on you - and good lovers have a mental notebook that they keep - and refer to every time they make love. You want as many pages as possible in that book.

2 - You are starting to open the door to a better love life. Once you feel more confident during sex (as Caroline will tell you) it only get's better.

I always say if I knew back than what I know now, I would have stayed singe...I never had a problem dating women, but I didn't like to sleep with every one, and ended up in long term relationships that took their time to develop sexually. As a result, my sexpertise took longer to develop...and when I think back at all the bad to OK sex I had with some HOT women, I cringe thinking about it - because I now consider myself a great lover...based on my last couple of partners feedback, of course.

[dawn9800]

Yea I want to know how hee responded he he he be as graphic as you want we are all grown here!!

Good luck girl before you know it you will be making him CRAZY with ONLY words!!

[Fallen1]

When you said deeper, harder - did he react accordingly? If he did, did you like it? If so, why stop talking?

Yes he did and yes it was very nice. It's just hard to start something that you haven't been used to doing.

[metboogie]

The HARD part is OVER!!! You already started it...now just keep it going...

[NightDragon_81]

Is it really hard to start saying things in bed? I would love to do more of this but I'm not too sure how I would be received. I worry I'll sound like a dork!!

[Fallen1]

I worry I'll sound like a dork!!

Yeah me to. Also I would like some feedback from him but he has never mentioned anything about me doing it. I'd like to know if it was anything like he was hoping for.

[NightDragon_81]

I wonder why it's so hard for them to say how they feel about the whole talking thing? I would have thought that men would be lining up for that.

[C]

I wonder why it's so hard for them to say how they feel about the whole talking thing? I would have thought that men would be lining up for that.

Because they have learned this young with their boyfriends and only used it in slang of a woman. With a woman they love they have too much respect. They have to wait for her to give them permission and then say these same sexual words with passion.....But they do love it said to them.....

[NightDragon_81]

I'll have to give it more of a go then Caroline, thanks!

[metboogie]

I agree with Caroline...I was never able to be vocal in any way when I was younger...sex wasn't that intimate. When I got into really serious relationships and sex was all about a connection between us, I was able to be more vocal...

I'm still not a big talker, but that's part of my overall personality. However I am a much better lover and I'm not afraid to say something in bed.

Like I said earlier, for those ladies who want to start, all it takes is a little word or 2 - you aren't trying to start a conversation! It should be something like harder, softer, deeper, right there - any one of those will work. Than see if he responds with his actions.

Remember, it's also harder for men to have something to say because, well, it usually ALL feels good to us. He may not talk unless you ask him a question...

Maybe take a shower together and ask him if you can wash him...

Than while washing his penis, ask him if it feels good. Ask him if you can taste him...but don't give a full BJ - just a taste...

Than come back up and ask if he wants more. Go down and give more of a taste.

Come back up and ask him if it feels good so far (but keep your hand on his penis at all times, gently rubbing it)...ask him what would make it feel like the best ever...

Believe me, at first he may not know what to say, he may say I don't know...go back down and try something different - look at him, ask if he likes that - does he want more?

If he is really not responding at all, go ahead and finish with your hand, not with your mouth (in the shower the best way to jerk off a guy is from behind, so you can do it like he would). If he gives you any type of positive feedback, reward him with the best BJ ever.

Than move it over to the bed and get on top of him...tell him it's his lucky day - you will do anything he wants, all he has to do is ask. (My easy answer would be to ride me and when I'm about to cum jump off and finish with your mouth)...but see what he says...

Most men will feel obliged to do the same to you at some point...and there you go.