[Natasha123]

I totally understand what you are trying to say as far as the lack of physical contact causing major frustration .... I've been there a time or two myself .


BUT, say it is a psychological issue, in my opinion this approach will do nothing more than cause it to worsen and therefore backfire. Other approaches would be a better bet in this case. I do think however it is wise to be truthful and discuss it in a tactful way as to how this particular situation could lead to straying.

If she has health insurance there is help for her.

I guess you just expect a partner to already be packaged with perfection.

[Fallen1]

If she has health insurance there is help for her.

As I stated - Other approaches would be a better bet in this case.

I guess you just expect a partner to already be packaged with perfection.

I'm not sure where you are coming from as my response ("in my opinion this approach will do nothing more than cause it to worsen and therefore backfire") was in agreement with you ..... shrug.

[Mourningman]

I don't want some to think I force myself on her I just like sex.All kinds of ways different things that now she say are gross.Since when did a guy going downtown on a gal become gross? I just have this sick in the gut feeling that she don't or ever will be happy again having sex with me.And because of that I have crazy thoughts about myself or worse what going on with her. I can honestly say that after these years living like this and things not going my way it is very easy to see myself going astray.Sorry

[helen99]

Well I would just like to add personal experience into the convo. Being a female who occasionaly has horrible pain with sex, I wouldnt say that was actually an emotional thing. IT REALLY DOES HURT, but it is also is very upsetting because like any other person YOU May Want sex and not being able to enjoy it can get you very frustrated or emotional. I know on occassions where it was painful for me I would continue. My thoughts not being that I want my man to finish lol but my thoughts being "maybe this will just go away if i keep at it" lol seriously tho . Its really something you cannot say is just an emotional problem you HAVE to be going through what she is to really know....

Hope everything works at well for the both of you though.
<3 Helen

[Mourningman]

I don't know what the heck to think anymore,I don't want her to not feel bad or be in pain and I want to boink. If i were to suggest some weird stuff with no penetration i don't know what kind of a reaction i would get? Ya know.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Well, it's my opinion that she should be willing to please you, even if she wants little to do with it. Would it really be that big a deal for her to give a few blowjobs here and there? She might even try anal - might be less painful.

I guess it depends if she's become completely asexual and if she's willing to put any effort in.

I'm sure you're nice as pie to her, a little reciprocation would be just.


What do you think she's going to say if you ask her for a blowjob? "stay away from me you creep, why on earth would you expect me to do that, it's demeaning"? Even a handjob?

Hmmmm, I wouldn't be a happy bunny in your position.

[Natasha123]

Well, it's my opinion that she should be willing to please you, even if she wants little to do with it. Would it really be that big a deal for her to give a few blowjobs here and there? She might even try anal - might be less painful.

I guess it depends if she's become completely asexual and if she's willing to put any effort in.

I'm sure you're nice as pie to her, a little reciprocation would be just.


What do you think she's going to say if you ask her for a blowjob? "stay away from me you creep, why on earth would you expect me to do that, it's demeaning"? Even a handjob?

Hmmmm, I wouldn't be a happy bunny in your position.

You really are just making a bunch of presumptions.

And why in the world would anal be less painful???

[C]

Well last night my wife and I did have sex but it had been a long time.All the while she is wincing and saying how much it hurts.We don't do doggie that hurts now face to face hurts. It is concerning because she is not enjoying it one bit and cannot wait until I am done.She said I am squishing her when I am fully supporting myself with both arms and legs so only the pelvises are in contact.Does anyone think that this pain is truely physical or is there more to think is happening.I am only a 190 lb guy but you may think i weigh 300lbs. I am beginning to think the emotional side of things for her are the real cause of this pain.I offer all kinds of foreplay and try different stuff to get things going but no-go she would rather have it finished before they get started.I am not selfish and am not complaining I just want her to enjoy what i would have to offer and also for us to enjoy sex together.
I felt guilty last night because she ran out immediatly and went to the bathroom.I wondered if she was crying. If I could talk about what goes on because of this people here would think I am koko.

How old is your wife and how long have you been married? Seeing I have not read this whole thread yet but don't ask her if she would want to sleep with another woman...

[bbhollywood]

sex

why is everyone assuming that this women has a phychological issue, has anyone even asked themselves that maybe he should ask his wife if she could explain to him how it hurts. maybe this women has not been to the dr yet. where does she feel pain, maybe she has a cyst on her cervix and it hurts and she is not sure what the problem is. for all we know maybe her husband is just big and it hurts. so where did we ever get the empression she has a psychological problem. any how they just need to sit down and talk about it.

[Fallen1]

why is everyone assuming that this women has a psychological issue, has anyone even asked themselves that maybe he should ask his wife if she could explain to him how it hurts.

You are correct there very well could be a physical issue here that she needs to have tended to. I didn't overlook that possibility I simply based my reply on his statement - "I am beginning to think the emotional side of things for her are the real cause of this pain."