[Obelisk]

So what do you want then? You say you don't want a church chick, and you don't want a ONS. So what? casual dating? But you want the girl to be a virgin?

You do want kids though, that's a huge plus.

So what exactly is it that you're afraid of?

If it's just the virgin thing, just lie about it.

If it gets heated, tell the girl "look it's been a while since I've been with a chick so bear with me". At that point you don't look like a virgin loser anymore, and you have some leeway that the girl will understand, ahem, performance issues?

That would be my advice.

[Obelisk]

Whoops sorry double post.

[Picksomething]

So what do you want then? You say you don't want a church chick, and you don't want a ONS. So what? casual dating? But you want the girl to be a virgin?

You do want kids though, that's a huge plus.

So what exactly is it that you're afraid of?

If it's just the virgin thing, just lie about it.

If it gets heated, tell the girl "look it's been a while since I've been with a chick so bear with me". At that point you don't look like a virgin loser anymore, and you have some leeway that the girl will understand, ahem, performance issues?

That would be my advice.

solid advice, ill probably go with the its been a while. fuark, i feel like i gotta make up girlfriends ive never had.

[Element]

You put lies into a relationship and that's what you'll make out of it. You say you don't want love, and not just one night. You wanting FWB? Sounds like you just want a girl around, and one that will have sex with you, but you have full intentions from the get go of dumping her for another woman. If the loose skin is what is keeping you from being serious, then I strongly suggest waiting until the surgery to have it removed, then go into the dating scene with your head held high.

[Obelisk]

You put lies into a relationship and that's what you'll make out of it. You say you don't want love, and not just one night. You wanting FWB? Sounds like you just want a girl around, and one that will have sex with you, but you have full intentions from the get go of dumping her for another woman. If the loose skin is what is keeping you from being serious, then I strongly suggest waiting until the surgery to have it removed, then go into the dating scene with your head held high.

That's why I asked him what he wants. If he just wants a girl for sex, then in the end, the lies won't matter much.

Feeling like you have to make up for lost time is pointless too btw. A few dates under my belt, 2 women I've actually slept with. I'm still at square one because I do want a lasting relationship. For me the kids thing is what's killing my chances.

[Picksomething]

You put lies into a relationship and that's what you'll make out of it. You say you don't want love, and not just one night. You wanting FWB? Sounds like you just want a girl around, and one that will have sex with you, but you have full intentions from the get go of dumping her for another woman. If the loose skin is what is keeping you from being serious, then I strongly suggest waiting until the surgery to have it removed, then go into the dating scene with your head held high.

You're right.... I dont want to lie, I dont want to cheat. I guess I said what I said because I always thought I wanted more than just 1 chick. I dont want to fall in love with the first girl I have sex with.... But why not right? Especially if shes the right girl.

------------------

Ive been on about 5 dates in the past 2 months with different girls and this chick yesterday, well... I just felt a click. Im so excited about her. Shes 28 but told me she lost her virginity a year ago, no idea why she told me that. She has dated a lot of guys, and been in a lot of relationships, so I dont know if I believe her, but why lie? Regardless, that date went so well, we sat at a restaurant for over 4 hrs and ended up closing it down and didnt even realize how time flew. She pretty much told me Im taking her out on another date and we are this upcoming weekend. And we already have plans for the middle of october as well already. Ive never felt this way about a girl. She actually made me laugh, didnt know that was even possible for a girl to be funny. Shes adorable, petite, and intelligent. Fuk, what am I saying. Are these feelings normal? Ive never felt like this before about a girl. But Ill be devastated if she feels my stretch marks are a hindrance and dumps me. I know we will take it slow for sure, based on her past, and obviously I am not trying to rush her at all based on my past lol. She did say she wouldnt date a guy if he didnt look good, plus I did snooping and her ex bf was as athletic as me, taller, but IMO definitely not as good looking.

[Element]

Talking about sex on a first date is a bit surprising to me. But, she may have told you that to let you know she has limited experience and isn't a "pro", meaning don't have high expectations of her. She also may have told you that to let you know she isn't fast moving in the sex department and you won't be getting any soon. But those are just my guesses.

It sounds like you two have some chemistry and it'd be worth exploring, rather than wondering "what could have been". My suggestion is to get to know her, spend time with her, and let her get to know you. Maybe once you two have a better understanding of each other and open up to another, you'll feel ok telling her of your worries in the bedroom.

[Picksomething]

Talking about sex on a first date is a bit surprising to me. But, she may have told you that to let you know she has limited experience and isn't a "pro", meaning don't have high expectations of her. She also may have told you that to let you know she isn't fast moving in the sex department and you won't be getting any soon. But those are just my guesses.

It sounds like you two have some chemistry and it'd be worth exploring, rather than wondering "what could have been". My suggestion is to get to know her, spend time with her, and let her get to know you. Maybe once you two have a better understanding of each other and open up to another, you'll feel ok telling her of your worries in the bedroom.

Yea Im hoping she told me that to basically say she was inexperienced and that she likes to take it slow. At least thats what I hope.
Anyhow, she texted me yesterday literally 15+ times, and sent smiley faces at the end of around 10 of her texts, mind you she never texted me smiley faces the first week. She said she wanted to go to the gym with me yesterday. I said I was busy and was going with my friend, she pushed and said, bring your friend that way you can help us both out. I replied "****, you're killing me, ok lets compromise, Ill meet you at the gym tomorrow." She said "Hmmm, let me check my schedule.... Ok that works!"

So Im seeing her today at the gym, which I feel is a bit awkward. I dont want to get friend zoned and so I feel I need to make sure to escalate to some extent so Ill just give her a peck on the cheek when I see her and maybe initate a tiny bit of touching during our workout.

[Picksomething]

So she asked me when I lost my virginity....
I replied with "lol do you really wanna know?", she said yea.

So i told her Im a virgin and have only madeout at the farthest. She said it was sweet, and that she wished she had waited as well. She said if a relationship works out we will have to work on that because sex is an important part of a relaitonship.

Im almost getting oneitis for this girl im seeing. Shes told me last night (two weeks of knowing her), that she is starting to like me more than just liking me, and it scares her because she doesnt want to get hurt again.

Today we spoke on the phone, and I told her I didnt understand why she was still friends with him on FB and she started crying. Fuk, I dont even know what to do. All I could do was try to console over the phone. She still doesnt know about my loose skin or stretch marks. I told her when we were at the gym that iw as fat as hell and she was like "lol youre crazy, youre athletic and toned."

Ive also told her Im afraid to tell her a secret because it could end things. She asked me if it was a physical characteristic, and I said yes. She then started telling me everything shes insecure about, her eyes, her nose, her small little pouch (lol shes a size 0), her face, how she doesnt feel cute compared to other girls, etc etc.
I didnt tell her about mine yet, but this girl seems like a keeper, I guess we will see.

Also, Im virtually positive shes only had actual intercourse with 1 guy as she even said "to be frank, I slept with him, I wish I didnt give him that, I have never done that before."

[jns]

It sounds like you've found a girl to fall in love with. Good luck.