[muffin70]

Well after 11 years of marriage my wife and I actually had a good talk about our sex life. We are in our 40's and have no kids

we have sex about once a week - 90% of the time it is missionary position, occasionally doggy style

Anyway we had a good talk about things and I asked her how come she won’t give me a blow job unless I am wearing a flavored condom – she said she just doesn’t like the taste of a mans penis and finds is more palatable if I am wearing a colored condom. I also asked her why she won’t finish off a blow job in her mouth (with condom on) and she said years ago she was giving an ex BF a blow job (with no condom) and he unexpectedly exploded in her mouth and she said it was the the most discusting thing ever having a mouth and face full of cum.
This is also why when she does give me a hand job as soon as I start to cum she quickly takes her hand away so she doesn’t get any cum on her hand – I have to finish myself off when this happens. She finds the whole ‘cum’ thing repulsive, but is happy for me to cum inside her during sex as she loves the feeling of me squirting a load into her.
I think she doesn't like the fact that it is wet, warm, sticky and requires cleaning up afterwards.

I am happy to please her in any way she wants, but the few times I've tried going down on her she as asked me to stop as she said it 'tickles'. I can only make her orgasm by stimulating her clit with my fingers while sucking on her nipples (which I am more than happy to do!)
One time I begged her to let me climax over her breasts, but she only agreed if I could put a clean unfolded handkerchief between her breasts - and I had to make sure I came onto the hanky and not on any part of her body.

I asked her if she has any sexual fantasies and she said she didn’t really - she likes to he cuddled and kissed, then I told her some on my fantasies – some of which involve me ejaculating over her breasts or bottom, or her masturbating me while she is wearing sexy lingerie and one of her pretty silk scarves around her neck – but I didn’t get a positive reaction from either. I don’t expect her to swallow my cum or let me climax over her face, but would like her to be a little bit more open when it comes to sex

How can I talk my wife in to trying out 1 or more of my fantasies in the future?

[rcoreyus]

My wife used to really hate it, has gotten better and doesn't mind if I finish on her. She still really doesn't like giving oral, but will do it for my birthday (I don't think she realizes that I look forward to that all year , she may not enjoy it, but she is REALLY good at it). She also won't tell me her fantasies at all. She likes a quite wide variety of sexual activity, and we both very much enjoy all different types of intimacy, but for some reason she can't bring herself to tell me what she wants, I need to guess.

I don't know what to suggest for you. I assume you are happy to do what she wants in bed, if only she would tell you. Is there a chance that she isn't telling you what she wants because it would make her feel that she needs to then do what you want, and she doesn't want to?

[tinycit]

Since you titled this thread that your wife doesn't like cum, I'm thinking that it is important to you that your wife like cum.

In the very beginning "liking" cum really has nothing to do with it. That comes later. If your wife wants to like cum, she can. It's a surprisingly easily acquired taste. It's sort of like there's just a little learning curve to get over at first. In my case it just required a little motivation and a little persistence on my part. My husband helped me and supported me every step of the way. My first three swallows were the most difficult. After that it was no problem. It only took a few dozen swallows to acquire a taste for it. It was very much worth the minimal effort. My husband is very happy with my ability not just to swallow cum, but that I now enjoy doing so. By the way, your diet really does affect the taste as well. If you want to taste really good, stay away from caffeine and eat some pineapple once a day. That's what I have my husband doing and it makes for some really good cum for me.

[thecatlady]

Well after 11 years of marriage my wife and I actually had a good talk about our sex life. We are in our 40's and have no kids

we have sex about once a week - 90% of the time it is missionary position, occasionally doggy style

Anyway we had a good talk about things and I asked her how come she won’t give me a blow job unless I am wearing a flavored condom – she said she just doesn’t like the taste of a mans penis and finds is more palatable if I am wearing a colored condom. I also asked her why she won’t finish off a blow job in her mouth (with condom on) and she said years ago she was giving an ex BF a blow job (with no condom) and he unexpectedly exploded in her mouth and she said it was the the most discusting thing ever having a mouth and face full of cum.
This is also why when she does give me a hand job as soon as I start to cum she quickly takes her hand away so she doesn’t get any cum on her hand – I have to finish myself off when this happens. She finds the whole ‘cum’ thing repulsive, but is happy for me to cum inside her during sex as she loves the feeling of me squirting a load into her.
I think she doesn't like the fact that it is wet, warm, sticky and requires cleaning up afterwards.

I am happy to please her in any way she wants, but the few times I've tried going down on her she as asked me to stop as she said it 'tickles'. I can only make her orgasm by stimulating her clit with my fingers while sucking on her nipples (which I am more than happy to do!)
One time I begged her to let me climax over her breasts, but she only agreed if I could put a clean unfolded handkerchief between her breasts - and I had to make sure I came onto the hanky and not on any part of her body.

I asked her if she has any sexual fantasies and she said she didn’t really - she likes to he cuddled and kissed, then I told her some on my fantasies – some of which involve me ejaculating over her breasts or bottom, or her masturbating me while she is wearing sexy lingerie and one of her pretty silk scarves around her neck – but I didn’t get a positive reaction from either. I don’t expect her to swallow my cum or let me climax over her face, but would like her to be a little bit more open when it comes to sex

How can I talk my wife in to trying out 1 or more of my fantasies in the future?

Wow. Your wife and I sound like we have almost the exact same sexual preferences lol. Right down to oral sex tickling, and mostly wanting to be cuddled and kissed over sex :P. The fingering with nipple sucking also sounds like me o.0. Also, not liking to swallow cum, or not wanting it on the face and thinking it's messy.

Well for me, I would not enjoy having a man cum anywhere on me, but if he really really wanted to have me cum on my breasts, I would let him every once in a while. Maybe you could try doing it in the shower? I don't know if that would still be good for you, but you could cum on her breasts and it would all go down the drain.

If cumming on her in the shower wouldn't do it for you, maybe put a bunch of towels down on the bed beforehand so she can wipe herself off right after?

As far as getting her to like swallowing cum, I don't know. Swallowing someone else's bodily fluids is a little bit gross. I don't know if I would do that. I guess I would, if my man were really really fixated on it. I'd definitely have him eating a healthy diet and drinking some pineapple juice to help with the taste, though.

Maybe instead of trying to convince her to do everything that you fantasize about, try to find something different to spice up your sex life that both of you can enjoy. Maybe you wouldn't enjoy it quite as much as the fantasies, but it would still be something different and fun. Maybe like some light roleplaying, or a different position, or a vibrator (maybe your wife is like me since we are both ticklish, but I have an extremely sensitive clit and can't place a vibrator directly on it, so if you use one on her make sure to put it on the lowest setting very lightly over top first so it doesn't hurt), or just something like that. I don't know; some form of compromise.

[jen1447]

If she doesn't like cum, she doesn't like cum. Getting her to tolerate it for your sake probably won't go very far to making her feel all cuddly and wanting to bond. I'd just let it go.

Maybe ask yourself this too - would you like it if she did that to you?

[kira]

You shouldn't try to make someone like something they don't want to. Personally I hate any sexual fluids (my own or his) above the waist. I tolerate it doing hand jobs but usually with an "ewww" comment and quickly cleaning myself up. I'll do oral if the guy is very clean like right after a shower. Otherwise just the penis tastes bad. Like old sweat even if they haven't been sweating. I don't swallow cum though. I let it fall back out of my mouth and leave him to clean it up. I don't have any desire to change any time soon.

[rcoreyus]

This really gets down to what people should be willing to do to please their partners. I'm generally of the opinion that in a relationship people should try really hard to please each other in bed. That its worth sometimes doing things you don't like because in that sort of situation you will also get to enjoy a wider range of things that you do. Its all grey of course - some things are too unpleasant to do. Some things you partner just sort of likes, others may involve a strong fetish that for irrational reasons make it very important to them. (I don't think anyone else can tell you what is important to YOU in bed).

[Stillness]

Well said corey. I think some of it goes to commitment too. The last thing you want Is for your spouse to feel trapped because you completely shut them down on something they really want.

[Justice]

Guys (rcoreyus and stillness) I have to wonder though whether this is really just commitment or what you are willing to do to please your partner.

I mean letting a guy cum on your breasts or belly (unless you are somehow phobic) seem like a reasonable compromise if you don't want it in your face or mouth - but needing to have a woman swallow or deep throat you is not a "non-invasive" little compromise for a lot of people.

I know plenty of people who will not eat oysters or snails or bunches of other things (the thought of which makes some people sick). But you will eat what I want you to eat even if I could/would never do it? (or even if I loved snails is it reasonable for me to have you eat them - even if they make your nauseous - because I cooked them or need to watch you eat them? )

[Justice]

Also I remember watching a porn flick at my best friends bachelorette party many many years ago half of the girls were either virgins or fairly inexperienced. But it was funny that the more experienced and/or married girls where almost universally turning away or saying yuck when the guy in the flick came - and it wasn't in the woman's mouth.


there are plenty of women here who like (guys) cum - I do wonder though in general what the percentages are (in real life)