[dandy]

So I have been dating my man for 6 years now and sex was always a part of the relationship. Out of nowhere after mentioning a quick love making session to him, my boyfriend blurts out that he wants to be celibate. At first I thought it was a joke but he told me he was truly serious. I asked him why and he told me it was because he doesn't want to go to hell and wanted to get right with God! And he wants to stop sinning which meant he wanted to stop doing all things considered a sin and sex, well premarital sex was the top sin. I had no words and couldn't understand why now after 6 years! But like any loving partner I told him i would respect his decision though I would not choose it. I had to be real and told him I like sex and I want sex, and for me it is important in return he called me a nympho and suggested I am too horny to control myself. Its been more than a week now and yes we have had sex since the celibate topic. So now he has confused me. He is still talking about becoming celibate still even though we just did it not long ago. He told me I have no choice but to be celibate with him so I am forced into it in a way. What Do i do?! What are some fair alternatives to substitute the no sex for someone who likes sex?

[Stillness]

Is marriage on the horizon at all? I'm assuming it's just premarital sex that the problem, right?

[dandy]

Well he says he wants to wait until marriage so I am thinking he knows he wants to get married but not sure if it means that will be the near future. Yep I have no issue with getting right with God but hes put more emphasis on the premarital sex more than anything.

[effy2014]

Not that I am skeptic (which I am), but is there more to this story? Has he changed churches? Become more religious? Changed any other "Sins" in his life (ie drinking, swearing etc).

There is an underlying issue. He was a full participant in sex and now thinks you are a nympho? Something else is going on.

If he wants to wait, then have him set a date to be married. You are under no obligation to be celibate.

[Motorguy]

So I have been dating my man for 6 years now and sex was always a part of the relationship. Out of nowhere after mentioning a quick love making session to him, my boyfriend blurts out that he wants to be celibate. At first I thought it was a joke but he told me he was truly serious. I asked him why and he told me it was because he doesn't want to go to hell and wanted to get right with God! And he wants to stop sinning which meant he wanted to stop doing all things considered a sin and sex, well premarital sex was the top sin. I had no words and couldn't understand why now after 6 years! But like any loving partner I told him i would respect his decision though I would not choose it. I had to be real and told him I like sex and I want sex, and for me it is important in return he called me a nympho and suggested I am too horny to control myself. Its been more than a week now and yes we have had sex since the celibate topic. So now he has confused me. He is still talking about becoming celibate still even though we just did it not long ago. He told me I have no choice but to be celibate with him so I am forced into it in a way. What Do i do?! What are some fair alternatives to substitute the no sex for someone who likes sex?

Dandy i am going to be nice your boy is full of crap on the highest level he's never ever going to give up sex. Now you having premarital sex then why doesn't he marry you problem solved right. But then has sex with you some more this is all crap by him. Was he religions before this coming out wanted to become celibate with you about premarital sex or just out of the blue he said this. Well first I don't think you want to be celibate he comes out and said you will live this life style. I am sorry who died and made him god that you will live this life style as well. So Dandy you have a big decision to make do you stay live his way or you send him packing and he can go be a monk some place else. Life's way to short to live how someone else thinks you should live. So now the ball in your court do you give up sex for him forever or find another man who you can enjoy sex with and have a wonderful sex life with. If I told my wife this she would say there's the door good luck have a nice life end of story. Plus hell would freeze over first before that ever would happen with me.

[PinkySweet]

Eh... My husband and I tried being celibate when we first started dating (He was religious) I chose to try to understand and respect it. Long story short, it didn't last longer than a couple weeks lol

I find it weird that he would out no where want to be celibate?

He called you a nympho? You should have told him "Thank you" lol...

[dandy]

Not that I am skeptic (which I am), but is there more to this story? Has he changed churches? Become more religious? Changed any other "Sins" in his life (ie drinking, swearing etc).

There is an underlying issue. He was a full participant in sex and now thinks you are a nympho? Something else is going on.

If he wants to wait, then have him set a date to be married. You are under no obligation to be celibate.

I did ask if he knew I was the one he would marry and he told me sarcastically that I was #1 so far and that I had potential. Then he told me that it is true he doesn't know if he will end up marrying me. I did get pretty angry and upset. Telling him to set a date to marry I feel wont work out so well.

[dandy]

Dandy i am going to be nice your boy is full of crap on the highest level he's never ever going to give up sex. Now you having premarital sex then why doesn't he marry you problem solved right. But then has sex with you some more this is all crap by him. Was he religions before this coming out wanted to become celibate with you about premarital sex or just out of the blue he said this. Well first I don't think you want to be celibate he comes out and said you will live this life style. I am sorry who died and made him god that you will live this life style as well. So Dandy you have a big decision to make do you stay live his way or you send him packing and he can go be a monk some place else. Life's way to short to live how someone else thinks you should live. So now the ball in your court do you give up sex for him forever or find another man who you can enjoy sex with and have a wonderful sex life with. If I told my wife this she would say there's the door good luck have a nice life end of story. Plus hell would freeze over first before that ever would happen with me.

Well hes all of a sudden wanting to become more religious. He was religious before but not to this extent. Hes told me in the past God comes before me which I have no problem with but its like hes all of a sudden scared and and crazed to become a good christian. As if something scared him into suddenly wanting to change. I do have some thinking to do thanks.

[dandy]

Eh... My husband and I tried being celibate when we first started dating (He was religious) I chose to try to understand and respect it. Long story short, it didn't last longer than a couple weeks lol

I find it weird that he would out no where want to be celibate?

He called you a nympho? You should have told him "Thank you" lol...

Right?! lol **** if only I could have thought to say that.

[atskitty2]

In my opinion, if your objective is marriage, after 6 years of dating he thinks you may not be the one he marries, you're wasting your time. Just a side note

But to your point, this could be a phase he's going through. It could also be that he is genuinely trying to deepen his commitment to his faith.
It's unusual that people make major changes like that, but it happens.