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can sex make guy's get clingy?
I know this wont sound proper but 3 weeks ago I finally got rid of that selfish jerk. 4 days ago I did something I nevet thought id ever do. I ended up hooking up with a gorgeous stranger. It was wrong I know. But it was like it came out of a movie. I got lost in those eyes. I expected it as a hot in the heat of the moment thing. But he took it so serious. It was probably his 50th time. But he started demanding to meet my family. I said can't. Since I said no? He has gotten distant with me. I totally dono what to think of this. Dont worry abt sti I got myself checked out. Yesterday got my test results im good. Also, period is here. Yes, it was stupid to begin with. Still I must say this makes even no sense that a 38 yr old man white male acts as if meeting my crazy asian family is a must. Not being allowed to meet them hurt his feelings. Can sex make men clingy? -
I thought most guys think sex is normal like trying on new runners. He wont pick up my calls. Started in this dreamy phase reporting before he went to work when he got home. Right when I said I need
To observe where this is going before he met my family? He got cold stopped texting only replied when I texted. Then he stopped picking up my calls altogether. I texted him I'll be the bad guy & call
it as is " a hot in the heat of the moment". I was hoping for a response or argument. He totally didn't respond. I seriously do not get why or how he can take not meeting my family as an insult. My family is too crazy for him .if meeting him? They'll start printing out invites!Comment
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I wouldn't call a guy who's actually avoiding you clingy. You're concluding he's avoiding you because of the family thing, but mind reading isn't a science. Does it ever even work?
Now, something way more important. You've met him 4 days ago, had sex, got tested, got the results and are free from STI?
It takes months for HIV to show on an exam. And that's only one of the possible "bugs" you could have contracted. Months. I don't know what they've tested you for. You should get tested again three months from now. And again after that, but talk to the clinic to know when.
I'm not saying you've got something, but IF you have, it wouldn't be showing in a test taken so soon after the sexual encounter.
Good luck.
Now, can sex make a man clingy? Yes, it can. Many times I've seen it happen, he's clingy till he finds another willing woman who's kinkier, or more pretty, or just novelty. It's the same with us, women.Comment
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We are "people"..
Put this the other way around, a woman sleeps with a guy and expects she is in a relationship but she's not, he was satisfied with all he had, that's it.
It makes her feel used, just sex... And, she doesn't like it.
Men can feel like that too.
Men have feelings too.
He didn't want to just be " a heat of the moment" he was hopeful for something more.
Having said that, he may have been dreamy but not had a relationship in some time and was hopeful this was the beginning of something and could be very obsessive so in a way you are better of leaving it I think.
Before that, though I would text him again and say, I would like to date again and get to know you, see if we are compatible, you were "heat of the moment" because there was something about you, I'm not sure if it will lead anywhere but happy to go out for a date.
Then make sure that you are surrounded by people and he doesn't know where you live.
However, if you purely wanted sex from him only then understand, men can be like women and get hurt.PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!Comment
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It would seem that the stereotyped roles for men and women have changed. In my late teens and early twenties men just wanted sex and women wanted a relationship. Now it seems to have reversed; we women enjoy the pleasure of NSA sex while men seem to want to "bond". Of course this pattern does not include everyone, there are always exceptions.Comment
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Chandlers wishes - My text was alot more louder than that. Haha I dont think I can unstink this titanic. I said :
E , I was hoping to do this in person but this is probably less complicated. I might as well be the bad guy & cut the cord now before it gets any more tangled. I can't seem to see a spot for me in your life. Call it over analyzing but let's just leave things as is " a good in the heat of the moment". this will be my last msg to you.
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T.hanks for the explanation everyone. Yeah, I guess clingy is the wrong term. He was attached to me like glue rightafter the sex & detached after I said he isn't meeting the family til I observe where things are going.Comment
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I can't have any man meet my family til I know he cN handle my crazy family. But he felt insulted because thinking if an Asian woman didn't wanna introduce him to the family that he didnt matter. Thats why I kept thinking he was being a woman abt this. Normal guys do not wanna meer the family.Comment
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Yes, guys are totally capable of being clingy. This is another reason why I myself am weary of sleeping around, because I don't want some random guy being dramatic and needy.
Don't feel bad about what you did. If you're not comfortable,
"Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"Comment
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Wow, the reverse sexism is rampant in this thread. A man is acting like a woman because he thought that sex with mzhk had some meaning? Is it that far fetched that sex should have meaning and that men . . . just like (some) women . . . might think there was more to it? Or, put another way, men can be used for sex because the stereotypic man should be emotionless and used to being promiscuous.
If a man were to post that some random girl he slept with was excessively clingy or became dramatic and needy after he used her for "heat of the moment" sex, he would be slammed for his behavior. My only advice is that the next time you wish to use a person for sex only, agree on the ground rules before hand. Contrary to the mainstream, men are human and actually have feelings."The only consistent feature of all of your dissatisfying relationships is you." Despair.com "Dysfunction"Comment
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