Women's Health Interactive Forums

  • Before signing up for our forum please read our rules.

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

No Pleasure during Penetration

Collapse
X
Collapse
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Here's my take on your query


    I have found that the more you stimulate the sponge-y kinda G-spot the more 'feeling' you get the more sessions you do it. It takes some time though, and it also depends on how thick the G-spot is anyeay, as to how much sensitivity you'll get (I've heard anal can be even better as it's more likely to put pressure on the G-spot but I haven't tried that yet, as I'm concerned about the hygiene, even with condoms and enemas).

    Other than that the sensation is nice but nothing particular as such. I found doggy style to be a really good body position, he can enter fully, and I'm forward which puts less pressure around the abdomen.
    The only drawback is that you can't look at each other's wonderfully cringey sex-faces, and your knee caps hurt (my knee caps get slight pressure sores, and I found that my legs get very stiff, but then I've had trouble with my knees and back. It's better on the bed but so difficult and painful to do on any type of hard surface, even with putting a pillow under my knees to help).

    I used to love being on the bottom but after doing doggy-style frequently, being on the bottom nowadays just doesn't do anything for me (never understood the side sex position, it's such a weird and uncomfortable rhythm.
    What about those swanky condoms with the ribbed bumps etc. that could help?

    Have you tried stimulating the clit whilst having sex either by hand or by toy? By toy it's easier to hold and puts less muscle stain on your arms when your arms and hand in the same prolonged position.
    Or having sex, allowing him to climax however you've both agreed to do so, and then for him to play with your clit until you've climaxed..
    I have found that it's better the other way around, I'm not particularly sleepy after sex compared to the few sexual partners I've had.

    I guess it's hard for men to deal with the fact their shlong doesn't give you epic feelings, I'd probably be disappointed if any of my partners had told me my vagina wasn't great for them either sensation wise.

    Any way, if he's making you feel pants for something you can't physically control then he needs a sit down (and vice versa if it was the other way around).

    Sex is about feeling amazing, and being on a very intimate other world with your partner, it's about consent, trust, and care, and can also be about exploration, and understanding each others personal needs too.

    So if yourself or he, aren't experiencing what you want to experience, then try some techniques, toys, buy a book, watch some helpful sex idea videos, or watch porn for some ideas (we all know that the plumber arriving early or on time is just a blatant lie though, and oddly enough I've started to pay more attention to the decor and furnishings in porn videos than the porn itself "That's a lovely wooden bedside cabinet!").

    I hope you manage to feel better about yourself, and do what feels right, if masterbation is the main thing that does the job and your able (if you want/ if you can) to do something he likes as well, that isn't necessarily penetration than there's nothing wrong with that.

    I don't really care if penetration doesn't do much for me, (I like how it makes my partner feel), as I know there are other things I like that's better that I can do with my partner and vice versa.

    xxx

    Comment


    • "
      I guess it's hard for men to deal with the fact their shlong doesn't give you epic feelings..." xspedigx - This cracked me up. LOL
      "Be what you're looking for."

      Comment


      • Originally posted by Beautiful Disaster View Post
        "
        I guess it's hard for men to deal with the fact their shlong doesn't give you epic feelings..." xspedigx - This cracked me up. LOL
        Hi Beautiful Disaster,

        It's all about the tongue and how and where to use it. At least that's what I've found to be true.

        My ex used to tell me to get my head between her legs and she'd tell me when I was done. It might not have been that candid, but it was close.

        The woman I'm seeing less frequently has told me many times that she thought that she could become addicted to oral sex orgasms. She'll slide in a change up to our routine, but in short time it's back to oral sex orgasms. She has told me that she fantasizes about my going down on her when we're apart. She must be doing a lot of fantasizing because I haven't seen her in almost a week.

        I do have empathy for the OP's lack of pleasure during penetration. I hope she has identified cause. I'm sure that an OB/GYN would be able to diagnose cause and get her on the road to penetration pleasure. I hope that to be true.

        Comment


        • Hey Iamjixtx100, I know this post is a bit dated so I hope somehow you’ll see this response lol but I literally created an account just to say I experience literally the exact thing you do/did as far as penetrative sex I am 24 and started having sex at 23 but before then have done clitoral stimulation to myself and even tried dildos to “get me ready” for real sex and when it happened it doesn’t hurt it just feels like something is going in and out this is the same for masturbation I can only feel pleasure from and climax to clitoral stimulation alone and I see everyone, not just on here, but every blog site or help forum page saying either that I’m not aroused enough it all in my head or that most women don’t orgasm but no real solution or diagnoses(if applicable) I hear from personal friends all the time that even if they don’t orgasm the act of a penis going in and out of them brings a pleasurable feeling which I’ve yet to experience…if I ever will.
          I wrote ALL of this to ask if your situation has changed since this point and if so what changes were made or is this some kind of medical condition?

          Comment


          • Originally posted by Iamjinxtx100 View Post
            Hi-
            So here is the short description my post:

            I am female, I feel no pleasure during penetration, regardless if I am attempting to masturbate or if I am having sex with my boyfriend. It has always been this way for me and it's kind of wrecking havic on my relationship because I am 29 now and it's so hard to force myself through sex because it is boring with no feeling.

            To be clear, sex is NOT painful. it just doesn't feel like anything. just sort of like pressure in there and sometimes I can't even tell he's im there. side note: He is not "small"...I have this same issue with masturbation as well. it doesn't feel like anything.

            It's very disappointing to have the passion on high with your guy and want it so badly and then not feeling anything as soon as you get started. I have read posts like this before and I have seen several people chime in saying that it is normal for a woman to not feel anything. That doesn't make sense to me because every woman in my life who I have asked claims the exact opposite saying that it feels amazing to them...

            Help...
            Hey Iamjixtx100, I know this post is a bit dated so I hope somehow you’ll see this response lol but I literally created an account just to say I experience literally the exact thing you do/did as far as penetrative sex I am 24 and started having sex at 23 but before then have done clitoral stimulation to myself and even tried dildos to “get me ready” for real sex and when it happened it doesn’t hurt it just feels like something is going in and out this is the same for masturbation I can only feel pleasure from and climax to clitoral stimulation alone and I see everyone, not just on here, but every blog site or help forum page saying either that I’m not aroused enough it all in my head or that most women don’t orgasm but no real solution or diagnoses(if applicable) I hear from personal friends all the time that even if they don’t orgasm the act of a penis going in and out of them brings a pleasurable feeling which I’ve yet to experience…if I ever will.
            I wrote ALL of this to ask if your situation has changed since this point and if so what changes were made or is this some kind of medical condition?

            Comment


            • Originally posted by LoveHunni View Post

              Hey Iamjixtx100, I know this post is a bit dated so I hope somehow you’ll see this response lol but I literally created an account just to say I experience literally the exact thing you do/did as far as penetrative sex I am 24 and started having sex at 23 but before then have done clitoral stimulation to myself and even tried dildos to “get me ready” for real sex and when it happened it doesn’t hurt it just feels like something is going in and out this is the same for masturbation I can only feel pleasure from and climax to clitoral stimulation alone and I see everyone, not just on here, but every blog site or help forum page saying either that I’m not aroused enough it all in my head or that most women don’t orgasm but no real solution or diagnoses(if applicable) I hear from personal friends all the time that even if they don’t orgasm the act of a penis going in and out of them brings a pleasurable feeling which I’ve yet to experience…if I ever will.
              I wrote ALL of this to ask if your situation has changed since this point and if so what changes were made or is this some kind of medical condition?
              Welcome to WH Interactive Forums LoveHunni. From being on these forums a while, I believe your experiences are quite normal. I have not read of any properly conducted scientific experiments being done that give more information on what is different between women that leads to such different experiences. Personally I believe it is due to people being physically just a bit different (which I found out about while being a juror on a medical malpractice case). Experiences and what a person's brain ties together play a big part in this but also there can be differences in peripheral nerves leading to different sensations and differing levels of sensations along with differing levels of hormones.

              In your particular case, have you been able to enjoy oral sex from a partner and have it go all of the way to a climax? If so is that at least somewhat satisfying or does the lack of enjoyment from penetrative sex make the experience bittersweet?
              I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
              ...
              Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

              From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

              Comment


              • I have told people over and over and over again that you must spend time on foreplay. the biggest problem is just not enough foreplay. Women must be wet before you enter her. If she's not dripping wet then its going to be uncomfortable or even painful. without natural lubricant there will be friction, discomfort, or pain. That will lead to dyspareunia or worse vaginismus the later is not good to say the least. My biggest tip is dont grind the clitoris and don't "come here" finger the so called gspot because I don't believe the gspot is real. I've read about the Graffenburg spot and the organ that has 31 ducts but gspot, that produces orgasm ? NO this is nonsense ! Kissing is foreplay, cuddling is foreplay, kiss her ears gently around what the call the helix, even licking her ears with your tongue because its sensitive. Just don't slime her ears too much that's not pleasant. play with her hair. this must be done very very gently. kneed her scalp with your fingers very gently and slowly shell like it or you'll like it because its relaxing. You don't want to pull the hair which obviously will hurt her scalp. caress her body for an hour (I know its a long time but that's is foreplay) it works I know it works. if you don't feel wetness at the entrance of her vagina then the stimulus is inadequate or there is something else bothering her. Turn the light off because women always feel inhibited to some extent, spend 1 whole hour on foreplay and remember the entire body is an erogenous zone slow very very gentle caresses which produces a cathartic affect and over time this produces an orgasm it just depends on how much time you are willing to spend of foreplay. women require a lot of foreplay to reach orgasm. its a long drawn out process to reach that place. Anyway I hope this helps.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by LoveHunni View Post

                  Hey Iamjixtx100, I know this post is a bit dated so I hope somehow you’ll see this response lol but I literally created an account just to say I experience literally the exact thing you do/did as far as penetrative sex I am 24 and started having sex at 23 but before then have done clitoral stimulation to myself and even tried dildos to “get me ready” for real sex and when it happened it doesn’t hurt it just feels like something is going in and out this is the same for masturbation I can only feel pleasure from and climax to clitoral stimulation alone and I see everyone, not just on here, but every blog site or help forum page saying either that I’m not aroused enough it all in my head or that most women don’t orgasm but no real solution or diagnoses(if applicable) I hear from personal friends all the time that even if they don’t orgasm the act of a penis going in and out of them brings a pleasurable feeling which I’ve yet to experience…if I ever will.
                  I wrote ALL of this to ask if your situation has changed since this point and if so what changes were made or is this some kind of medical condition?
                  Hey, I also made an account to say I have pretty much the same experience as you both. I'm 27 and began having sex at maybe 22. No pleasure with penetrative sex. It feels like touching an elbow - no pleasure at all or like something is moving in and out. I have never, ever orgasmed. When I began masturbating ehen I was a child, I would dry hump pillows and eventually normal hump them. I eventually feel a final small "good" sensation after, humping a pillow, that lasts literally less than a second and then feel nothing! My clit will become sensitive.

                  Fingering myself doesn't give any pleasure and vibrators don't really help either. If a guy fingers me I feel a bit of pleasure then nothing If a guy gives me oral I feel basically no pleasure (but I know his technique is really good, my body just isnt responding). I did previously have pain with sex but had some pelvic floor sessions and think it's better now and I just needed more foreplay.

                  Might be a bit personal/TMI but how do you get youtself to climax? You said clitoral stimulation but how exactly? And what does it feel like? I'm SO TIRED of people who havent experinced this adding their useless comments saying - your partner needs to try more, you need to be more stimulated, most women dont feel pleasure with penetration. The last one is not true . They just say it because they dont have an answer.

                  Sorry this comment is all over the place. Just have to respond now before I completely give up.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by Iamjinxtx100 View Post
                    Hi-
                    So here is the short description my post:

                    I am female, I feel no pleasure during penetration, regardless if I am attempting to masturbate or if I am having sex with my boyfriend. It has always been this way for me and it's kind of wrecking havic on my relationship because I am 29 now and it's so hard to force myself through sex because it is boring with no feeling.

                    To be clear, sex is NOT painful. it just doesn't feel like anything. just sort of like pressure in there and sometimes I can't even tell he's im there. side note: He is not "small"...I have this same issue with masturbation as well. it doesn't feel like anything.

                    It's very disappointing to have the passion on high with your guy and want it so badly and then not feeling anything as soon as you get started. I have read posts like this before and I have seen several people chime in saying that it is normal for a woman to not feel anything. That doesn't make sense to me because every woman in my life who I have asked claims the exact opposite saying that it feels amazing to them...

                    Help...
                    Hey, I hope you are still active on this. I made an account just to commrnt on your post. I finally found someone who has a similar experience to me. Did you find a solution in the end?

                    I'm 27 and began having sex at maybe 22. No pleasure with penetrative sex. It feels like touching an elbow - no pleasure at all or like something is moving in and out. I have never, ever orgasmed. When I began masturbating ehen I was a child, I would dry hump pillows and eventually normal hump them. I eventually feel a final small "good" sensation after, humping a pillow, that lasts literally less than a second and then feel nothing! My clit will become sensitive.

                    Fingering myself doesn't give any pleasure and vibrators don't really help either. If a guy fingers me I feel a bit of pleasure then nothing If a guy gives me oral I feel basically no pleasure (but I know his technique is really good, my body just isnt responding). I did previously have pain with sex but had some pelvic floor sessions and think it's better now and I just needed more foreplay.

                    Might be a bit personal/TMI but how do you get youtself to climax? You said clitoral stimulation but how exactly? And what does it feel like? I'm SO TIRED of people who havent experinced this adding their useless comments saying - your partner needs to try more, you need to be more stimulated, most women dont feel pleasure with penetration. The last one is not true . They just say it because they dont have an answer.

                    Sorry this comment is all over the place. Just have to respond now before I completely give up.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by pinkrose123 View Post
                      Hey, I also made an account to say I have pretty much the same experience as you both. I'm 27 and began having sex at maybe 22. No pleasure with penetrative sex. It feels like touching an elbow - no pleasure at all or like something is moving in and out. I have never, ever orgasmed. When I began masturbating ehen I was a child, I would dry hump pillows and eventually normal hump them. I eventually feel a final small "good" sensation after, humping a pillow, that lasts literally less than a second and then feel nothing! My clit will become sensitive.
                      Fingering myself doesn't give any pleasure and vibrators don't really help either. If a guy fingers me I feel a bit of pleasure then nothing If a guy gives me oral I feel basically no pleasure (but I know his technique is really good, my body just isnt responding). I did previously have pain with sex but had some pelvic floor sessions and think it's better now and I just needed more foreplay.
                      Might be a bit personal/TMI but how do you get youtself to climax? You said clitoral stimulation but how exactly? And what does it feel like? I'm SO TIRED of people who havent experinced this adding their useless comments saying - your partner needs to try more, you need to be more stimulated, most women dont feel pleasure with penetration. The last one is not true . They just say it because they dont have an answer.
                      Sorry this comment is all over the place. Just have to respond now before I completely give up.
                      Welcome to WH Interactive Forums. I too, wish that someone would come up with a solution that many women could find success with.
                      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                      ...
                      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

                      Comment

                      or

                      Womens Health orange logoGet The Newsletter

                      Receive our passionately crafted, medically reviewed articles and insights — the stuff nobody else talks about but you want to know — delivered right to your inbox.

                      Latest Activity On Our Forums

                      Collapse

                      Latest Topics On Our Forums

                      Collapse

                      Working...
                      X