[Mes T]

Yikes, this thread is really depressing. Chelsy ya gotta stand up for your needs because there will come a day when you will basically snap and walk out on him, and it'll be a "surprise" that he "didn't see coming" from his POV, but for you it'll be this build-up of bad feelings that will just overtake you.

You mentioned you never felt passion with your boyfriend, well I think that's something kind of important to consider... Are you absolutely sure that you'll be okay in a passionless relationship...

I complained once on this forum that my boyfriend also stopped "making out" with me like he did during the first few weeks, and I seriously considered leaving just because I knew that as a woman, a sensual and sexual woman, I wanted that type of connection. Luckily he seems to have changed his ways now... I think it was just a result of various life changes he was going through... Well anyway, if that lack of intimacy continued, I would have left.

[Sixty6Twenty2]

Oh yeah, I got the kissing cut off 4 months into it and it was a killer. Talk about feeling undesirable. It's moved way up the list now. Problem is these guy will really pour it on until they have your feelings secured and then cut it off - "I just don't like it". Funny how you are supposed to keep liking putting your mouth and tongue to other uses on their behalf.

I have the same problem as many others in this thread...and this post hit the nail on the head for me! They DO pour it on until they know you're secured. And it makes me so angry. >.<

With me, my boyfriend (of 3 and a half years now) was extremely affectionate in the beginning. He would hug me and kiss me all the time. He would tell me how much he enjoyed kissing me and how he just couldn't stop. He would tell me things like how he missed looking into my eyes when I was gone...cute things like that.

But, when it became clear that I wasn't going anywhere any time soon...all the affection faded. Now, I honestly can't even IMAGINE him saying the things he used to say to me...he doesn't even seem like the same person. Now he doesn't kiss me any more than a peck (sometimes I actually hold his face in place to prevent him from walking away from me mid-kiss)...I hug him, but rarely get more than a pat on the back in return...I have to guilt him into holding me at night... It depresses me to think about the past. The way he would kiss me, the way he would hold me, the way he would play with my hair or rub my back or hold my hand...all of it's gone.

I care about him and I believe he still cares about me...but, in a way, I feel used. At first, I thought it was me. I thought I had done something wrong...I thought he didn't like me anymore. But, I really do think that this is just the way he is...which basically means he lied to get me far enough in the door for him to lock it.

[WildChild]

I have the same problem as many others in this thread...and this post hit the nail on the head for me! They DO pour it on until they know you're secured. And it makes me so angry. >.<

With me, my boyfriend (of 3 and a half years now) was extremely affectionate in the beginning. He would hug me and kiss me all the time. He would tell me how much he enjoyed kissing me and how he just couldn't stop. He would tell me things like how he missed looking into my eyes when I was gone...cute things like that.

But, when it became clear that I wasn't going anywhere any time soon...all the affection faded. Now he doesn't kiss me any more than a peck (sometimes I actually hold his face in place to prevent him from walking away from me mid-kiss)...I hug him, but rarely get more than a pat on the back in return...I have to guilt him into holding me at night... It depresses me to think about the past. The way he would kiss me, the way he would hold me, the way he would play with my hair or rub my back or hold my hand...all of it's gone.

I care about him and I believe he still cares about me...but, in a way, I feel used. At first, I thought it was me. I thought I had done something wrong...I thought he didn't like me anymore. But, I really do think that this is just the way he is...which basically means he lied to get me far enough in the door for him to lock it.

Gee they must be twins

[sourpuss]

I accused my bf of lying to get me too and he got really offended. I think guys just think they need to do all of that stuff to get a girl. We've had many open talks about it and I think I can see where he's coming from. (not happy about it, but I understand a bit more.) Guys just aren't into that kind of stuff like we are and I think to them it's something they do out of anxiety of wanting to win a girl over, not because they like it. Seems a lot of men show they care by actually getting comfortable and settling in to a relationship. It's hard for us to get that they feel more secure when they don't have to try because we feel more secure by trying and seeing that they are trying. I guess that's where you need to find a compromise and just trust that they love you.

heck, I don't know

[Olympia]

Sourpuss...
Not all men... My hubby completely enjoys the lingering smoochie smoochie, from me... And we kiss all the time! First thing in the am, even with morning breath, ( may not use tongues..) afternoon, evening, and right before we
turn out lights to sleep..

[Sixty6Twenty2]

Sourpuss...
Not all men... My hubby completely enjoys the lingering smoochie smoochie, from me... And we kiss all the time! First thing in the am, even with morning breath, ( may not use tongues..) afternoon, evening, and right before we
turn out lights to sleep..

Aww...you lucky girl! I think your husband should give some other guys some pointers... lol

[Olympia]

Aww...you lucky girl! I think your husband should give some other guys some pointers... lol

Yep, I truly am... but he is not on loan!!

[sourpuss]

seconded! He needs to give a clinic.

[Rediscovered]

Sourpuss...
Not all men... My hubby completely enjoys the lingering smoochie smoochie, from me... And we kiss all the time! First thing in the am, even with morning breath, ( may not use tongues..) afternoon, evening, and right before we
turn out lights to sleep..

That is my sweetie, too~~and what is interesting to me is, he's the first man I've ever *wanted* to kiss with morning breath, or onion breath, or coffee breath~~it all tastes good on HIM and he feels the same way about me. Sometimes we just lie there with our lips pressed tight and breathe together. We always say we are taking in each other's yin and yang.

There was an article I read not long ago where they interviewed women and found the number one thing that turns a woman on is passionate kissing. For me, it goes straight to my genitals, lol~

It can be a sensual art form...when it's good, there's nothing more erotic.

[sungoddesschelsy]

I can't say he lied to me because there has never been alot of kissing but the amount has decreased drastically... he used to kiss me while I was sleeping and come in the kitchen and stand behind me holding my hips while I cooked and now all that happens is a Thank You for dinner... And I've thought alot more about it since I strayed from the relationship, but of course that will happen right... I mean it was an exciting fling that neither of us thought would happen, very passionate... we both thought we'd be together if we didn't have SO's