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Uneven Marriage Power Dynamic, Bringing it back into balance via Dominant Sex / Femdom / Pegging

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  • Originally posted by jns View Post

    Please elaborate a bit. I am curious about whether your husband found it be something that he would do again. Some times men want their partner to be dominate but don't know how to effect that change. They may have to be dominate in their work lives but they would prefer not to be in their sex lives.
    He thanked me when it was all over. He did cum from it, not from when I was doing it ( I really wasn't very good with my strap on ) but the Dom was pounding him pretty good. And even though I think that it embarrassed him to have pleasure from this, I am sure he will do it again. We have not talked about it that much yet as he passed out and then had to go to work early and just got home and went straight to bed. But he seems so peaceful.

    And yes you hit the nail on the head. The Dom talked about this a lot, that powerful men in powerful jobs sometimes have a great desire to be passive or submissive during sex but their egos will not allow them to be. This what I just did seemed to break that.

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    • Originally posted by DrJennyA View Post
      him engaging in actual sex with another man is a part of femdom that your therapist may be able to help you logistically sort out if that interests you.
      I bet against my husband ever being with another man yesterday but you were as you have been all of this talk totally right, I can see this actually happening now if we continue down this road , and my Dom said that she has another man that she can bring over to actually make this happen. As much as that has been a fantasy for me for many years I think I am still too shy to actually participate in that, so I may need a few more times of this before I can even have that conversation with my husband. I just am a little confused still if I am supposed to tell him that having sex with another man makes him gay or if it does not make him gay. I mean technically it is gay sex right? But mr.mr. makes a good argument against that in which I agree with. But I don't know if I am supposed to mess with his head to make him think it is being gay? Still confused about that part.

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      • You should let him know he shouldn’t be embarrassed by having a good sexual experience with his wife. I’ve never been able to get into dom sub stuff fully because as a King I want a Queen next to me. Powerful women are inspiring and make me more confident. I love sexual pleasure that comes from ‘I will do this for you because it makes me feel empowered to do so’ and my partner feels empowered because She take satisfaction from being the recipient in control

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        • Being gay is being attracted to the same sex. It’s literally nothing else other than that. Why would you want your husband to have sex with a man if he wasn’t gay?

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          • Originally posted by MrMr View Post
            Being gay is being attracted to the same sex. It’s literally nothing else other than that. Why would you want your husband to have sex with a man if he wasn’t gay?
            Because I would like to watch that very much? I of course would not do that unless my husband consented. But it has been a fantasy of mine for a very long time. When I was in high school I had a boyfriend who asked me to join him in a threesome with another girl and at that time I had never been with a girl and I definitely was not a lesbian, it was something he really wanted to do ( I never joined for other reasons, but I almost did ). So it is sort of the same isn't it? Just reversed?

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            • Originally posted by Nina O View Post

              Because I would like to watch that very much? I of course would not do that unless my husband consented. But it has been a fantasy of mine for a very long time. When I was in high school I had a boyfriend who asked me to join him in a threesome with another girl and at that time I had never been with a girl and I definitely was not a lesbian, it was something he really wanted to do ( I never joined for other reasons, but I almost did ). So it is sort of the same isn't it? Just reversed?
              Again lots of layers to this. Consent is always imperative. Safe words, even with Femdom are a good thing to practice. And yes it is very ok, and very normal for you to participate in , or have fantasies of your husband having sex with another male.

              But the basis in Femdom at least for a straight male ( even more so a homophobic or homosexually disparaging straight male ) to be "forced" to have sex with another male is the embarrassment of doing so, not because its wrong but because they have been by society trained that it was wrong. Femdom is all about power dynamic and the degradation of "testosterone" ( again, all of this all agreed upon beforehand and limits established ) . This very quickly crosses into abuse if it is not mutually consensual. This of course can be reversed in gender, but Femdom is specific to Female dominant, Male submitting.

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              • I had our daughter over tonight and I told her I joined her pegging club, after more than 1000 ewe moms, we had a really great conversation about it all. The relationship between men and women and the power dynamics and i have never been more proud to hear how well she has grown in the last few months. She did tell me that about half of her friends in college are all doing this. Apparently that means half the football team at her school is getting pegged.

                It was also interesting to talk about the "gay" aspect of this all, My jaw almost hit the floor when she told me that many of her male friends all have had sex with other men, and they are very open and casual about it, and no they do not identify to as being " gay " I guess it is just a normal thing to do and she was a little shocked that I didn't know that it was normal.

                I also just found out that amazon sells dildos. My credit card is going to melt

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                • Originally posted by Nina O View Post
                  She did tell me that about half of her friends in college are all doing this. Apparently that means half the football team at her school is getting pegged.
                  Yes Pegging has taken the nation by storm, and I am sure there are many conservative parents out there that will be horrified when they find out that their boys are all bending over. Little do they know it is probably one of the best things that could happen to them.

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                  • Originally posted by JennyA View Post

                    Yes Pegging has taken the nation by storm, and I am sure there are many conservative parents out there that will be horrified when they find out that their boys are all bending over. Little do they know it is probably one of the best things that could happen to them.
                    Yes it is the best thing. Jenny I have a question for you, I got a little carried away and was pegging my husband every night for that first week. Wave my hand in the air guilty as charged I was addicted. But then we took a break for a couple days, and I could start to see him get a little temperamental. My first response was to Pegg him again, which I did, and he turned nice again, but am I at risk of him getting used to this? Am I using my stick too often? Is there a honeymoon phase to all of this and it stops or can this last forever? My daughter has a friend that has been pegging her boyfriend for a year and a half and it's working for them but I just want to make sure I am not overdoing it.

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                    • Originally posted by Nina O View Post
                      ... but I just want to make sure I am not overdoing it.
                      If he has to wear a diaper, then time to scale back...Maybe let him rail you for a bit

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