-
Guest
Depends...in my bachelor days, I always made the attempt. For two reasons: I wanted to know if she'd actually go for it....which would tell me something about her morals/personality, and secondly if I wasn't interested in pursuing anything romantic, I'd still get some sex out of the deal.I've often wondered this about men. If he is moving it toward sex immediately, how many women does he so this with? Does he just collect them? Does he have enough depth to interact with a complex (not shallow) woman for more than one or two weekends? Is he a man ho? If so he's hands off.
Selfish, I know...but that's how it works.
Girls, don't you dare have sex on the first date - EVER.Comment
-
It also depends on the maturity level of the guy you are dating. If you have gotten to know them prior to the first date, as I did... you can be a pretty good judge of character. While I did not have intercourse on the first date, we were both so into each other and turned on and we did... other sexual activities. I held out on penetrative sex for a very very long time.
Not all guys judge a woman by her sexuality. Many do. My guy is in his late 20's me early 30's. I think he knew he wasn't dealing with a fast little girl, and we were stone sober. He knew a lot about me before the date, had an idea of the kind of girl I was and guess what? He was able to handle it when we moved fast into the sexual territory and we stuck it on out.Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.Comment
-
If the girls aren't allowed to put out on the firs date, that means I can't. Sorry, but as a man... I'm gonna get mine on the first, second, third, and so on down the line without coercion.
As long as she knows exactly what she's doing and is fine with it, what's the big deal?
OGThrough hypnosis, I create confident men and women to succeed in all facets of their lives. This place will soon get very interesting!Comment
-
Guest
To each their own...but I dunno - I don't think I could respect a woman that didn't respect herself. I don't find having penetrative sex on a first date to a complete stranger a very respectful or safe thing to do.If the girls aren't allowed to put out on the firs date, that means I can't. Sorry, but as a man... I'm gonna get mine on the first, second, third, and so on down the line without coercion.
As long as she knows exactly what she's doing and is fine with it, what's the big deal?
OG
Light kissing/touching - ok fine.
Every relationship I've had that began sexually intense has failed. My fiance made me wait a bit.
She's the one wearing the rock.
Comment
-
I don't disagree with that. My reasons for holding out were not to give him something to look forward to, or to run any kind of dating game. I was actually just plain terrified of opening myself up in that way after such a long time of shutting people out.To each their own...but I dunno - I don't think I could respect a woman that didn't respect herself. I don't find having penetrative sex on a first date to a complete stranger a very respectful or safe thing to do.
Light kissing/touching - ok fine.
Every relationship I've had that began sexually intense has failed. My fiance made me wait a bit.
She's the one wearing the rock. 
Sometimes relationships that are highly sexual at first can fizzle out if there is nothing but the sex holding it in place, etc. Some people make relationships to build to sex and some that start with the sex don't bother building the relationship.
When that happens its destined to be a rocky road, because you have nothing else to cling to in moments when the sex cools down.
Me and my boyfriend started on a friendship note, with a significant build up of flirting and tension before our first date. We started on a highly sexual note, though without actual sex, I just mean we were basically all over each other almost immediately.
We didn't stop with that though, we continued proper dates, proper getting to know each other further time, spending lots of time doing activities that were not sex related, while still enjoying each others sexuality OFTEN
We're still at it!!Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.Comment
-
I just feel the first time you meet someone you meet there representative. No matter how long you have chat'd online or over the phone/text/email. The first face to face meeting you are on your best behavior...its like a chess game! Women know from the first time they meet you if they are going to sleep with you or not. That doesn't mean you have to act on that impulse. Its about control, self respect, and values.
Now....if its just about sex..then call a spade a spade and go about your business. Thats if you know you don't want a future with this person (However I don't believe in meaningless sex) My girlfriend wants more than just a one night stand. I do not knock anyones hustle or lifestyle. I just don't respect the irresponsible irrevocable decision to engage in such a soul touching experience with every tom jane and janet
Comment
Get The Newsletter
Latest Activity
-
A balanced middle ground seems healthiest here. You can set a clear boundary without turning every disagreement into a fight. Calmly explaining how her...
08-15-2026, 07:35 AM By chrishillus -
Well, funny enough, I've talked to a few people about this, and we've all had a laugh that on social media and in certain circles, women are coming clean...
08-12-2026, 09:35 PM By JonnyR -
Reply to PCOS and unwanted hair growth
I had NO idea! But honestly, the new name makes so much more sense. I’ve always associated PCOS primarily with the reproductive side of things, so it’s...
08-11-2026, 12:12 PM By Birdie_567 -
Reply to PCOS and unwanted hair growth
BTW -- did you see that the renamed PCOS to PMOS?
Per online:
"Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) has been officially renamed...08-06-2026, 08:04 PM By JonnyR -
To me, there's a big difference between prioritizing your kids' needs and making your kids your entire emotional world. I've definitely seen situations...
08-03-2026, 01:59 PM By Birdie_567
Latest Topics
-
Does anyone have any experience with PCOS and getting rid of unwanted facial hair? What started as one singular strand on my chin in my 20s has turned...
07-27-2026, 07:25 AM By Birdie_567
Comment