[GentlemanGhost]

I would never expect a guy to make 100k/year or buy me a purse. I don't even carry a purse, never have.

I'm in shape because I want to be for me and my sport, not to attract men.

I've dated good looking men, short men, over weight men, guys who are broke....etc.

Looks and money have nothing to do with it. Of course, there's something to initial attraction but that only goes so far. If you expect a girl to be thin, pretty, no baggage and perfect teeth then you're going to only find superficial, shallow women who find that kind of stuff important.

Apparently, you're looking in all the wrong places.

I expect a women to have a decent face, not be morbidly obese, not have bad teeth, and not have 10 kids(sorry, but that just screams irresponsible to me).


I really don't think those are shallow expectations.

[KMonte85]

So you think because "decent looking" girls aren't paying attention to you, it is because they are money-grubbing and superficial?

Its obvious you're frustrated that you haven't found a significant other yet, but you can't just assume that they aren't flocking to you because all women are narcissistic hags!

Do some self-reflection... from your previous post it sounds like you had some trouble as a young teen.. kind of the "ugly duckling" syndrome and I think that frustration is following you into adulthood! What are you projecting to the women you are interested in? If you're a hard-worker and a decent guy like you say, you should be able to find someone (although that does not in any way mean its easy - there are fantastic single people all over this forum looking for love - its tough!).

If you project to them this bitterness that you've shown here while venting, well, can you blame the ladies for staying away??

[GentlemanGhost]

So you think because "decent looking" girls aren't paying attention to you, it is because they are money-grubbing and superficial?

Its obvious you're frustrated that you haven't found a significant other yet, but you can't just assume that they aren't flocking to you because all women are narcissistic hags!

Do some self-reflection... from your previous post it sounds like you had some trouble as a young teen.. kind of the "ugly duckling" syndrome and I think that frustration is following you into adulthood! What are you projecting to the women you are interested in? If you're a hard-worker and a decent guy like you say, you should be able to find someone (although that does not in any way mean its easy - there are fantastic single people all over this forum looking for love - its tough!).

If you project to them this bitterness that you've shown here while venting, well, can you blame the ladies for staying away??

Quite honestly, I do see your perspective. What type of attitude would you advise I take


Also, I think women unlike men expect to get something better than them.

Men expect to marry a women as good looking at them

[Futureboy]

I expect a women to have a decent face, not be morbidly obese, not have bad teeth, and not have 10 kids(sorry, but that just screams irresponsible to me).


I really don't think those are shallow expectations.

Expect is a very strong word!

If you marry and she became ill she got fat and here teeth fell out would you site in the divorce she turned ugly?

Don't judge people based on this stuff, work through it. Yes we would like a 'fit bird' for preference. But when you go out with them it's not there looks you cherrish. If you want an attractive girl and nothing else rent one! if you want a beautiful women inside and out earn one

Think about you point of view you are clearly very frustrated at the moment

[GentlemanGhost]

Expect is a very strong word!

If you marry and she became ill she got fat and here teeth fell out would you site in the divorce she turned ugly?

Don't judge people based on this stuff, work through it. Yes we would like a 'fit bird' for preference. But when you go out with them it's not there looks you cherrish. If you want an attractive girl and nothing else rent one! if you want a beautiful women inside and out earn one

Think about you point of view you are clearly very frustrated at the moment

Lol, no I wouldn't divorce my wife if she got ugly. That would be a jerk move.


So, your saying if I want a attractive girl and nothing else....rent one?

Are you suggesting I hire a .

[the wench]

if you havent already seen it...watch Shallow Hal....sounds just like you!

[Futureboy]

if you havent already seen it...watch Shallow Hal....sounds just like you!

lol

[KMonte85]

Quite honestly, I do see your perspective. What type of attitude would you advise I take

That is really up to you... my advice is to be you, but on the lighter side... go to social events and don't have expectations that you need to find someone there to date. Keep an open mind and think to yourself that of all the places you go, there has to be women out there who are friendly and kind and not superficial. Sometimes love is better imperfect. It might not work the way you think it will, but you can still get it to work.

Also, I think women unlike men expect to get something better than them.

Men expect to marry a women as good looking at them

Again with the grand be-all-end-all of statements! There are men out there who will only date people they think are more attractive.. there are women are there who do the same. There are men and women out there who seek out less attractive people. There are men and women out there who don't care about looks at all so long as they have a kindred spirit. You will drive yourself crazy believing that all women are this way...

Seriously, if I thought as negatively of men as you think of women... well I would happily remain single with 54 cats because that sounds like a pretty terrible life being attached to a selfish, greedy, superficial, needy, narcissistic human being. No. thank. you.!

[GentlemanGhost]

That is really up to you... my advice is to be you, but on the lighter side... go to social events and don't have expectations that you need to find someone there to date. Keep an open mind and think to yourself that of all the places you go, there has to be women out there who are friendly and kind and not superficial. Sometimes love is better imperfect. It might not work the way you think it will, but you can still get it to work.



Again with the grand be-all-end-all of statements! There are men out there who will only date people they think are more attractive.. there are women are there who do the same. There are men and women out there who seek out less attractive people. There are men and women out there who don't care about looks at all so long as they have a kindred spirit. You will drive yourself crazy believing that all women are this way...

Seriously, if I thought as negatively of men as you think of women... well I would happily remain single with 54 cats because that sounds like a pretty terrible life being attached to a selfish, greedy, superficial, needy, narcissistic human being. No. thank. you.!

Ya, that would suck.


Anyway, I will try and force myself to believe that perspective.


Working out and having a decent job doesn't hurt though right?


All my life, I have been viewed as the overall loser. Luckily, I had wealthy parents and they put time and money to make me go from autistic to non-autistic.



I don't know. A part of me feels I don't DESERVE a women because I really wasn't supposed to live a normal life. If natural selection had it's choice and I lived in the ghetto without resources, I would have been working at McDonalds.

[KMonte85]

good job and physically fit? sure those are definite positives. But don't look at them as positives that the opposite sex will see... look at those two benefits as great things about yourself, accomplishments to be proud of. You need to start thinking more positively about YOU, and then maybe you will start thinking more positively about potential girlfriends...