[Amber]

What I ended up doing was sending a very short email saying after reading this email, I can easily see we are not right for each other. I'm sorry but I'm going to pass. Goodbye.

That email probably made him wonder what he did wrong but I don't really care if he is thinking that. I say that because I have emailed men being nice, saying why it is not going to work. They get very defensive and nasty. Stick that.

Then you got the guys who say, oh I won't do that again, or some other bull. But this guy there was too many red flags that I have no desire to just over look. For one thing he couldn't stop contact me before I even sent him a reply note. 6pm came along and he was emailing me again. I felt like he was already just waiting to come home to contact me. Just like his email of him coming home to a woman.

He is already talking about soulmates and partners in crime to me, while we haven't even met or talked on the phone yet!! Soulmates don't come for me until way long down the road. He thinks he is so crazy about me but he knows nothing about me. I was asking him questions and he wasn't asking me anything back until the last two emails. And then the final straw was the fact that he was expecting to hug him really soon and he liked hugging a lot of times. That made my skin crawl, finally answering my question if I was really attracted or not. I guess not!

There is a guy who just loves the idea that someone is actually paying attention to him. Desperate!!

I read about blocking in the help section. I'm finding out you can block him so he can't email you. But what I'm not too happy about is there is no way to block him so he can't see my profile anymore. I just looked at my section that says who has looked at my profile. He did in the last half hour. Ugg! Get over me buddy and move on!!!

Little, I have been lucky not to have any really abusive emails but I'll make sure to remember to report them if I do. The ones who get nasty just send the last email and it ends.

[Obelisk]

That guy should just look for information on the internet about what he's doing wrong. Unfortunately he will probably blame the women, "they" are evil because they don't give him a chance.

There's no excuse for anyone to be a moron nowadays, forums like this one exist. Dude should be coming here and asking what did he do wrong. But alas, he won't.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Have to ask.

Is that you Obelisk in the picture ? :P

I remembering cringing myself Amber, seeing them still looking at my Profile "last 10 people to view your profile" .... Erg.

[Obelisk]

Have to ask.

Is that you Obelisk in the picture ? :P

I remembering cringing myself Amber, seeing them still looking at my Profile "last 10 people to view your profile" .... Erg.

Yup it's me lol.

I tried online dating once. I'd get women chatting with me, a few times, then they'd disappear. Never knew why. I was not being the creep like this guy. I just chatted like "how's your day, what are you hoping to find, etc etc."

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Nice guns.

Anyways, I'm trying to think back to when I tried that scene... I think the funny sarcasm worked for me, humor.

20 Questions made me un-comfortable or just chit chat that had no meaning behind it.

I think if I was asked "how's your day been" I'd feel like an invasion you don't know me at all, yet... And, often that leads to, what type of work do you do, where about in Adelaide do you live etc etc ...

[Obelisk]

Nice guns.

Yeah that's what they all say See why I wish I was bigger downstairs as well? But that's for the other thread

Anyways, I'm trying to think back to when I tried that scene... I think the funny sarcasm worked for me, humor.

I think the problem with online dating is that it shouldn't be a copy of meeting someone in real life. What you're describing is that I might do to talk to a girl I meet on the bus, or at a mall. I know that gets the girl interested, but online dating should be more about trying to find the qualities in the other person that you need. I can see how that might seem like playing 20 questions though.

I have no issues talking to women outside the internet anyway, it's once they say yes that I start getting mind screwed by my "issues"


I also have a feeling that women see online dating more of a self esteem tool. A girl that will probably not get too many guys to talk to her in real life will probably get 200 e-mails a day on a dating site.

Even the hottest guys (which I'm not btw, I have a good physique but definitely not a 9 or 10 like other dudes) will get maybe 3-4 e-mails a day. I remember I tried POF, and I had a bunch of pics similar to my avatar (always with clothing though). I got maybe 1 e-mail a week. I'd follow up and never get a reply. I e-mailed some women also and never heard back.

If I go to a mall, if I can scope who's checking me out, and talk to them, I'd probably get one date out of maybe 20 girls I chat to? Again it's a looks thing.

I honestly have no idea how other people who aren't as good looking find each other. I know a lot do it thru social groups. I'm part of none. My parents know absolutely no one. I'm on my own to find women.

[PhrendlyPhil]

He's not going to propose marriage to you through an email thread (at least not before meeting you), so don't sweat it. It's very hard to judge a person via email. If you have some common interests, set up a short date at a coffee house and have a cup of coffee with him (this is how my parents met). In person is the best way to get to know someone and take down most of the shields. If it doesn't work out, you can meander back home and move onto the next suitor. All you lost was one evening out (but you still keep the cup of coffee).

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Amber what site are you on?

POF? RSVP? E-Harmony? Is that it? Little would remember I bought across a couple of guys from POF, to this Forum and a couple of ladies and ended up in a relationship with one of the guys for 9 months or so, he in America, me in Australia, tough huh.. But none were on the dating side of the Forum, I just got to know them via a lounge section that was quite fun which we started over here and it worked well, people had fun too...

In any event, I still think so many emails is showing desperate.

When meeting for coffee as I said before many a time, drive yourself there and don't let him walk you to the car. I know it's sad in this day and age to play 'MOTHER' but who knows what's out there. Just reading up yesterday about an older guy that kept facebooking a 22 or 23 year old, she told him off but ended up meeting him. He ended up killing her. She went to his place.

Obelisk. just a side note. I deliberately wrote that You knew that you would attract girls as physical is a good thing it's where chemistry comes from BUT, charisma (once you open your mouth) is just as good trust me... Works the same. In fact better than "guns" as often we wonder why the guy needs to do that... What is he hiding .... And, as for social groups (if you break up with your girlfriend :P, ) JOIN some... You need to get out there into this big wide world.

Sorry Amber

[Amber]

CW, I would rather not say online but the dating website is one of those paid ones. POF is not paid so I wonder if you get a different kind of crowd. You knows if it is really a better crowd. lol

Another website if you want to pick up a woman is OKCupid. That place has every walk of life!

I have never been picked up in a mall or in a store. I have talked to some people casually in line but nothing ever happens. I can't meet someone that way.

Social clubs do help. That is how I met my ex-boyfriend. But since him, I haven't been lucky to find another guy that way.

[Amber]

When meeting for coffee as I said before many a time, drive yourself there and don't let him walk you to the car. I know it's sad in this day and age to play 'MOTHER' but who knows what's out there. Just reading up yesterday about an older guy that kept facebooking a 22 or 23 year old, she told him off but ended up meeting him. He ended up killing her. She went to his place.

That is scary! I have read the "rules" on online dating. I always meet them there, in my own car at a public place. I always tell a friend where I'm going and when, if it is a first date. I also give the friend the guy's profile info and cell phone. I tell them I'll email them once I get home, so they know I got home safely.

I have read not to leave your drink to go to the bathroom, in case they want to slip a drug in there. But that is a little harder to do.