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I dated an East Indian man many years ago. He dated many ethnicities but wanted to marry Indian. He was under tremendous family/cultural pressure to marry due to his age. He'd been "arranged" to marry at least twice but refused. He was early 30's I think.
I will date outside my race/culture but I've not found great attraction or compatibility in those men, thus far.
Just thinking out loud here-nothing really to add of interest.
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In my own ethnic group, I saw so many way things failed amongst my friends. Maybe that is why I went out of my ethnic group so much and ended up marrying out of my ethnic group and language. I don't think there was any more hesitancy than I would have had with someone else who was also compatible.I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
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Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?
From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia [CENTER][URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php"]Register![/URL] | [URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/help#vb_faq/site_rules"]Rules/FAQ[/URL][/CENTER]Comment
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I myself was weary of getting involved with an Indian man to only find out that his family has someone else lined up. My white ex-boyfriend was the first to show me to his family within a few months of dating, whereas my Indian exes didn't show me to their family. My first Indian ex in college, who called himself "liberal", ended up getting an arranged marriage to a woman from India.I dated an East Indian man many years ago. He dated many ethnicities but wanted to marry Indian. He was under tremendous family/cultural pressure to marry due to his age. He'd been "arranged" to marry at least twice but refused. He was early 30's I think.
I will date outside my race/culture but I've not found great attraction or compatibility in those men, thus far.
Just thinking out loud here-nothing really to add of interest.
I think our personal happiness also depends on who we attract. The high living expenses in boston and confusing roads/traffic can be a mood killer. People think Chicago is expensive, but apartment listings are half the price of boston apartments and have more amenities. Driving is easier as well. My family can connect me with other sources (such as beauty and personal needs) that are cheaper.
"Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"Comment
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I've been to both Boston & Chicago. Boston is great, but it's not the "vibe" for me either. Love Chicago tho, been there several times and could easily live there I believe, if not for the bitter cold.
Some background: the Indian man I dated had come here on his own - his family was mostly in India, and England. I did ask my Indian man why he was bothering to date outside the culture. His reasoning seemed to boil down to just not really knowing what he wanted, IF he wanted to adhere to his cultural, religious & familial bounds. I think he struggled very much with this Western culture & it's pressures, against his family & caste expectations. He did eventually marry an Indian woman after a few years, and they now have a daughter. He was strong in his Hindu faith as well.
We'd have never worked out as a couple, but he is a great guy & we keep in touch. He made peace with it all eventually and I think he leads a very happy life now.[CENTER][URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php"]Register![/URL] | [URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/help#vb_faq/site_rules"]Rules/FAQ[/URL][/CENTER]Comment
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What was the vibe you got? Boston has it's strengths, but it's best to settle when you're a native IMHO...or if you just really love it with a passion. I'm more spiritual than adamantly religious, and I'm pretty flexible overall. So, I don't think inter-cultural relationships will be an issue for me. If someone is orthodox and very set in their ways, I can see issues. But, if two people are willing to be open, listen and work it out.......why not?"Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"Comment
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I did find Boston to be a little abrasive, unfriendly. New Yorkers have a reputation for that, but I have been to NYC and visited throughout the state and met with nothing but open, friendly people. So, I've never been back to Boston. Shame, it's a beautiful city.[CENTER][URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php"]Register![/URL] | [URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/help#vb_faq/site_rules"]Rules/FAQ[/URL][/CENTER]Comment
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I do - I try not to make a judgment on a city based on short visits like that, but I can't disagree with your experience.[CENTER][URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php"]Register![/URL] | [URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/help#vb_faq/site_rules"]Rules/FAQ[/URL][/CENTER]Comment
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Along this line, I've been dating only within my immediate area, and have decided i probably need to open up to surrounding areas even if it's a bit if a drive. How do you meet people?[CENTER][URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php"]Register![/URL] | [URL="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/help#vb_faq/site_rules"]Rules/FAQ[/URL][/CENTER]Comment
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