[Ahryin]

There is a book by Esther and Jerry Hicks called "Ask and it is Given" a well worth read! It speaks about being happy, the law of attraction, and bringing peace into your life. It assisted in making me more aware of my surroundings and my power of my own life.

though I apreciate you saying you will remember my words I said them because I mean them. I have personally seen women stay and know first hand some of the repercussions. The day everything will change for you is the day you are proud of yourself and learn how to keep that pride

Many Peace and Blessings to you

Ahryin

[somiserable]

I have realised that ultimately he never respected me and all he did to me for 14 years was batter my self esteem and use me as a lacky, while he spent £200 per week in the pub! What he did to me was emotional and mental abuse, out of it all the silent treatment was the worse, he wouldn't talk to me for weeks on end and then hed just get up one morning and say "make me a coffee then b****" and start laughing like nothing had happened! I can't even count the amount of times he did that to me, living in a world and getting up wondering "is he going to talk to me today". I lost that much weight at those times because it was mentally draining. He never used his fists on me in 13 years, however when I found out hed cheated, and it got brought up, which is inevitable, he did this last year. He spent my money while me and the 17 staff we have were out working, he told his friends in the pub that us "monkeys did all the work for him". He is a nasty, spiteful, horrible, disrespectful man (thats the polite version) and he will grow old very lonely. Future boy, I will buy thise shoes and make them fit! Ahyrin, I will be grateful to you forever, if you too need ANYTHING, i am here too! God bless you all x

[Ahryin]

LOL I hope you take him to court and win it ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! Now that thought makes me smile

I can't stand a lazy man

[somiserable]

I wont have to anymore, I will clean up after myself and my son, not lackying after someone who couldnt even load the dishwasher and waited till I came home from work for me to do it. Life is going to be so much fun, I can feel it in my bones!!!!! My son back at school Monday so I'll be able to have a good clear out and declutter my life!!!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Hey mis...

If you stay with us, that will be your nickname, so your actual name is now redundant

Unfortunately, you can't change your username on this site, so let's stick with mis, it seems very fitting for a woman with so much courage and determination, having been abused for so long and taken it.

At some point in our lives, we actually see the "abuse" and see it for what it's worth

We acknowledge that we are a human being, a caring person, someone with so much love to give and unfortunately, "wasted years".

But those wasted years aren't really. Because, we grow and learn and become stronger and stronger.

You are a woman. A real woman. Your beautiful. You have soul. And, he is not a man, a real man, unattractive in all aspects of his behaviour and has no soul.

Keep to your plans. Keep to your beliefs, because you are right. There is life after abuse and a darn good one at that

CW

[somiserable]

To be perfectly honest I don't know what happened mid morning today! I honestly thought about begging him to let us stay together, and go back to where we started, for a few hours thats all I could think about, so I did some ironing, walked our little dog, went to my sisters for dinner. I suppose its natural to have moments of weakness like this? I'd done so well too, I'm ashamed to admit that this little gremlin called love keeps popping up, threatening to break me to the point where I cant live without him again? Is it possible to move on without feeling the regret that I feel now? If I look deep into my heart I know he doesnt care about me, so I'm trying soooo hard not to fall back into that trap, they seem such long days again now.......

[somiserable]

By the way Chandler I will be staying with you, this site has helped me so much and there are some wonderful people on here who talk so much sense!

[WildChild]

It is normal to backslide. You've had years of this, it's what you know and even though it's been miserable, it is in a way, comfortable.
LOL I've had times, even after years, when I've thought maybe I should have stuck it out with my first husband. I've reasoned that his affairs and constantly getting fired and the bong in his hand all the time, was half as bad as some of what I've been through. Then I come back to my senses and realise that trading one set of unacceptable behaviors for another just won't do!

[Ahryin]

Its ok mommas we ALL go through it, I can not promise that every day will be easy but I can say that it will be easier. You will start to enjoy your freedom. The best thing to do is keep busy, get a new hobby, work out, take a class...something to keep your mind busy. I love yoga and meditation. Training my mind helps a lot!

[somiserable]

How do you train your mind ahryin? I'd love to know, mines up and down at the minute and I thought I'd done so well!!!