[karenshiver]

Why did he suddenly write a letter? Did you tell him about the current situation? Did you tell your brother than you are being denied food money and have no means to survive on?

My brother knows the situation. I do not know why he suddenly wrote to me today. I had written him a letter a few months ago telling him that Brian beat me with a belt... back in the beginning of December, and, he suddenly writes today... I have no idea.

[karenshiver]

I am going to have to have dinner with my loser fiance and let him have his ****ty Maria so I can survive... I know what I have to do... I guess pride and self-esteem and self-worth go out the window when you are starving... I hope Brian goes to h-ll for this... he will get his in the end... and, Maria? She needs to focus on her fiance and husband and leave Brian alone... she needs to make her baby her first priority and she needs to stop trying to get all the men in her workplace to give her attention.. she is only like 20 years old and extremely immature and wants all the men to fall in love with her... she needs to grow up and pay attention to her baby and stop trying to use Brian for her own selfish reasons.

[karenshiver]

I wrote a letter to my brother on December 1, 2010 at 6:21 am (it says on Facebook) and he wrote me back on January 27, 2011 at 11:33 am... I do not know why he wrote me today... maybe he found this thread and is upset about me saying that my family is not helping me... he has the biggest ego on this planet.

[unsuregirl]

I am going to have to have dinner with my loser fiance and let him have his ****ty Maria so I can survive... I know what I have to do... I guess pride and self-esteem and self-worth go out the window when you are starving... I hope Brian goes to h-ll for this... he will get his in the end... and, Maria? She needs to focus on her fiance and husband and leave Brian alone... she needs to make her baby her first priority and she needs to stop trying to get all the men in her workplace to give her attention.. she is only like 20 years old and extremely immature and wants all the men to fall in love with her... she needs to grow up and pay attention to her baby and stop trying to use Brian for her own selfish reasons.

Your decision does not sound correct and rational... You might as well wait for a while.. WC might get back to you with some more info on some shelter homes...

[WildChild]

Forget everyone else.
It is time for you to own your life.
That means stepping up to find employment or get training, find what temporary assistance you can to tide you over and get hopping. You are at a time for transformation. Use the resources you have right now such as phone and internet. Find some - any employment, to get a start. If you have to be a dishwasher part of the day and clean toilets the rest of the day, DO IT. Don't tell prospective employers a big long story, you've been a housewife for years, now you are suddenly on your own, that is all you need to say about why you haven't worked. If you prove yourself reliable and do a decent job you will open other doors. Get familiar with the bus routes. Vary your routine and patterns. It would be best, once you are working to see if you can get to know some other women and move in with a roommate so you are less alone and not so findable. Be more careful about using real names on the internet too.

Stay alert and keep away from your now ex. I mean really keep away! When he realizes that you are serious, he may get a whole lot more dangerous.

[unsuregirl]

I wrote a letter to my brother on December 1, 2010 at 6:21 am (it says on Facebook) and he wrote me back on January 27, 2011 at 11:33 am... I do not know why he wrote me today... maybe he found this thread and is upset about me saying that my family is not helping me... he has the biggest ego on this planet.

That is not a bit too far-fetched?? I am not sure that he could have located your thread... could be just a co-incidence... how about giving your brother a call and filling him up on the latest turn the events have taken??

[unsuregirl]

Forget everyone else.
It is time for you to own your life.
That means stepping up to find employment or get training, find what temporary assistance you can to tide you over and get hopping. You are at a time for transformation. Use the resources you have right now such as phone and internet. Find some - any employment, to get a start. If you have to be a dishwasher part of the day and clean toilets the rest of the day, DO IT. Don't tell prospective employers a big long story, you've been a housewife for years, now you are suddenly on your own, that is all you need to say about why you haven't worked. If you prove yourself reliable and do a decent job you will open other doors. Get familiar with the bus routes. Vary your routine and patterns. It would be best, once you are working to see if you can get to know some other women and move in with a roommate so you are less alone and not so findable. Be more careful about using real names on the internet too.

Stay alert and keep away from your now ex. I mean really keep away! When he realizes that you are serious, he may get a whole lot more dangerous.

Please read this atleast 5 times before posting again... think over it.... let it sink in and then try to put Brian, Maria, father, brother, family aside for a while and consider this ... Might be hard for you to do but try

[karenshiver]

Forget everyone else.
It is time for you to own your life.
That means stepping up to find employment or get training, find what temporary assistance you can to tide you over and get hopping. You are at a time for transformation. Use the resources you have right now such as phone and internet. Find some - any employment, to get a start. If you have to be a dishwasher part of the day and clean toilets the rest of the day, DO IT. Don't tell prospective employers a big long story, you've been a housewife for years, now you are suddenly on your own, that is all you need to say about why you haven't worked. If you prove yourself reliable and do a decent job you will open other doors. Get familiar with the bus routes. Vary your routine and patterns. It would be best, once you are working to see if you can get to know some other women and move in with a roommate so you are less alone and not so findable. Be more careful about using real names on the internet too.

Stay alert and keep away from your now ex. I mean really keep away! When he realizes that you are serious, he may get a whole lot more dangerous.

So, just tell prospective employers I was a housewife and freelance writer and my husband died... do you think that would be okay? Do you think prospective employers would think less of me? I am 50 and have had no job experience and I do not have a degree... so, I know why they are not hiring me... I applied to so many jobs... and, not one bite. I had an interview with Walmart, but, that was it... they never called me back for the second interview. I am a writer who has been published in national magazines and newspapers and I wrote recovery material for Al-Anon for 3 years... I was on the at-large executive committee at the WSO for 3 years... but, I have applied to every newspaper, magazine, and newsletter in Colorado Springs and Denver, but no one has called me for an interview... I even went on Craigslist and applied for the writing consultant jobs, and the online writing jobs... nothing. I am feeling pretty worthless and hopeless right now.

[karenshiver]

I have to go run now... I jog three miles every day... I will be back in 30 minutes...

All of you guys are a Godsend... I so appreciate all of you and I am thankful to have all of you in my life right now... thank you so much for spending time with me this week and for all of your support, love, advice, suggestions, and encouragement... will be back shortly. xoxoxoxo

[mom2LJ]

This man you've been with all these years...he's not the same one anymore. His reasons for beating you were most likely out of guilt. for cheating on you with the other woman. He probably couldn't stand it any longer to not tell you, so his way of telling you is his feeling for her, most of his excuses sound like a lie. Such as her pregnancy and her boyfriend. It's hard to get out of that situation. My mom was in an abusive relationship with my dad for 23yrs. He beat her on a daily basis and accussed her of cheating. She claimed she never cheated, but my dad's anger and hatred got worse. He almost choked her to death and tried to commit suicide with a rifle. No woman deserves to be treated that way. I watched my dad do it to my mom and my brothers, I know what that is like. But you can end it and learn to be happy. You have to learn to respect yourself and know that you can make it on your own and make it by controlling your own money, having your own job. It's going to be hard at first. But you've got to do it for your own sake.

I guess this type of stuff is easier said than done. I've never been with anyone for 10yrs, for my fear of being treated the same way. I don't let anyone get close and once they exhibit controlling, abusive or lieing then I leave them before it gets out of hand. But...

I am sorry you've had to go through that, but it will get better with time and if you show him you are serious and I mean serious. Get a restraining order, press charges against him if you have too, get a support group and ignore all contact with him. He will back off and eventually leave you alone. As far as that "maria" girl goes, she should mean nothing to you, she's not the reason he chose to be this way. He chose to make the decision, so don't even begin to care about her life. What she does with it is her problem, not yours.

Focus on yourself, learn to respect and love yourself (you dont love yourself if you let him do this to you) One day you will find a man who will give you the world!!