[myhealth]

Hi All,

I am new here. Found this forum interesting and liked the responses you women give inorder to help other woman. Here is my story. I have a boyfriend and we love each other a lot.It is something beyond love that we do. Initially when he met me, I ws just like a passing cloud for him and so for me.But never had such kinda lust on him. He was nothing than a friend to me and when time passed by, we met and I fell in love.Later he went abroad and I couldn’t know him much so dint respond much and couldn’t trust him much. But at that time he was serious with me he says.

Later he came down from abroad and we fell in love again and this time with serious relationship. We made love and he again went to abroad. There after he completely stopped talking to me avoided me a lot. I was scattered as I had given my everything to him and couldn’t take back(no one can). I suffered a lot for him, health was under serious trouble, tried to kill myself and finally decided to get out of it and started doing all that to divert my mind but could never stop thinking of him. Later I got a news that he got married. (He was already and divorcee. )I was broken again. I was waiting for him to come to my place and talk to me and compromise but he got married without telling me. After that I decided to get married too.My engagement date was fixed that

I met him again and I broke my marriage for him. Fell in love and till now I am with him.
This time I know he is extremely serious about me and needs me more than I need him. But he has a wife and that wife has a kid. After she got pregnant I met him and we fell in love. He doesn’t like his wife.I know its hard to believe but yes he has stopped having sex with him and I know it.now what do I do?he is a muslim he can have 4 marriages but I don’t want to share him with other wife after I marry him.i want him to divorce her. But I understand his situation as he ia already a divorcee and divorcing this wife would be next to impossible as he has a kid.

Please share your views I will continue my story. Don’t want to bore oyu people.

[gatitia]

I know how it is to love someone so much you lose yourself...Been there done that..But you have to love someone enough to let them go sometimes. If he truly loves you then he needs to be the one making the sacarfice. You have given enough. Otherwise it wasn't love to being with. Live to love again and let that situation go...

[myhealth]

Thanks a lot for the reply. Was waiting. As you said if i did that, what about my life? and my future?my parents will get me married one day(within 2yrs or so). What will i tell mom?that i want to marry a man who is a muslim and has a divorce and has wife and a kid??? i know she will feel disgusting. If he is divorced i am confident enough to convince mom as mom knows my love very closely but done know that we are in a relationship. I dont know what to do at this point of time. I have chosen this and i know i have chosen something which is totally wrong and if i have chosen this, i should accept all the facts.

[gatitia]

I wish you the best, seek deep inside yourself and ask yourself if that's what you really want... Eaither way do "you" for you. Not because of someone else. It's never to late. letting go is hard but can be done. Something better is always coming...Be blessed...

[myhealth]

And he was and is so possessive about me that i lost all my friends for him. Just all alone in life with his world with my mom and sisters who are settled in life. Though i fought with him alot to do as he said,but later i understood and finally did it. Now love being in his world listening to what he said. But he is not according to what i want. BUt he is not having sex with his wife and that is the only thng which convinces me

[myhealth]

Thank you so much for your reply . But letting him go is an impossible task for me. He is my world. I will try all that i can and if no ways left out i will marry him as he is.

[gatitia]

It's easy to demand when one know's the other will give in...If your life only consist of pleasing "man" then you have already lost...True love doesn't hurt or demand, lie or control... One has to love yourself before you can truly love someone else... Always be "true" to yourself knowing who you are and who's you are....Blessings

[myhealth]

I know i have lost it. I have lost myself being in love with him. And i am so disgusting lover not to regret for it. I am so happy being in love with him and he being in love with me. I dont really expect him to be as i want as i always wanted him to lead me. Trust me his rules and morales which he has taught me has made my life better. Thing is, i am totally dependent on him and cant think of anything else. Just want to marry him and get settled with him that is it. Not to forget, he too loves me alot. I know all women say this. But i cant make you believe how much he loves me and i love him.

[myhealth]

And to all women here, I read in this forum about betrayals, lies, cheats, but the only thing which makes me astonishes me is, if there is a betrayal then there has to be something missing in you or in your relationship. Me and my spouse are happy with each other. Of course even i have gone through that betrayal from my spouse once upon a time and he is paying for it till now.(by loving me more). I realized where i was lacking behind that made him to go behind some other girls who are not important at all. I learnt it and now living happy with him. But if he does it again, i am sure not to forgive him. this is how one should be. I hate men taking women for granted.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Sweet notice how you haven't got a fluctuation of posters stating that? Betrayal, lies, cheating? It's because it's no use saying it to you, you are not at a point to listen..

But, if you read your words ....

I fell in love didn't trust, fell out of love.

He took my virginity the next time around, fell in love again and then he dissed me.

He got married without me knowing, dissed me.

He returned had more sex, and controlled me, to the point:-

Trust me his rules and morales which he has taught me has made my life better. Thing is, i am totally dependent on him and cant think of anything else.

That all you have is your Mother and your Sister, he knew full well that he had you hook line and sinker and as such you will obey his rules and he will control what you do.

He went with other girls because he wanted to.

He got married because he wanted to.

He stopped you having friends because he wanted to.

He had sex with you and made you lose your viginity because he wanted to.

He stopped you getting married because he wanted to.

He won't leave his wife as she has a baby, because he doesn't want to.

He won't let you out and about because you will see, all you are missing and he will not have the 4 wives, mmm wonder if there are 2 others in addition to you?

He IS TAKING YOU FOR GRANTED.

He expects you to accept a wife, a baby have no friends, and follow his rules.

That is NOT LOVE.

cw