[dogsrule]

D-Rule,

you 2 have got a huge age gap among you, so the difference in who wants to go out and who wants to stay home is most apparent.

Not all 62-year-olds want to sit around the house... there are a lot of them that go out and live very active lives.

In your case, that's not so.

It sounds to me like your marriage is over. If one person wants to call it "quits", then the other has no choice but to move on as well. The Mr. doesn't want to do that, but you've already done so.

If you're looking for him to cooperate in the divorce, then change your way of thinking.
It will be up to his lawyer and your to hammer out the details of any settlement; including taking care of the car payment(s).

You do know you have to tell him you're moving without him, since you've put your profile out there and you've already rented a place to stay.
You don't want him to stay with you. You have to tell him that.

I think your right. I just think this is al so much for him. I am scared and I don' t know why. I guess scared he will get mad not that he does anything just I hate confrontation. I instant message this guy that contacted me. Its weird writing to someone you don't know, and the security, not knowing if what they say is true or ??? How do you handle online communicating/dating if you call it that? I feel weird but want to meet people. I am starting Bunco so that will hopefully make me some friends. Thanks for any input. I am scared right now.

[Roog]

Thank you, whilhelm, I certainly enjoyed reading your posts. I concur with "rip off the bandaid". I've been on the receiving end of the bandaid rip, and while it was not pleasant, it was the fastest way to heal and move forward.

[Roog]

You don't have to "meet" anyone from on-line! Just wanted to let you know that posting profiles could ease the loneliness, boost your self-esteem, and help you get back out there.

[dogsrule]

You don't have to "meet" anyone from on-line! Just wanted to let you know that posting profiles could ease the loneliness, boost your self-esteem, and help you get back out there.

That;s true. I dont know if I will meet anyone but at least I am doing something to start off my single life. I slept in the spare bedroom last night. He asked me why and I told him we are seperated. I wont be able to get the rental house until Aug1 so until then, the spare room is it and hopefully, he will take me seriously.

Have a great day

[JubesInquest]

D-Rule,

Perhaps you're scared because you don't know how he'll handle the split???

He wants you around, but it almost seems as though it's a matter of his comfort in knowing that if something should happen to him, you'll be there.

Who does he have in his family that is willing to take care of him? Maybe he doesn't think any of his children will be bothered with him, and that they'll send him to a nursing home??? He can always get a senior citizen apartment. They have good communities and activities---maybe he'll mix and mingle there ... who knows?

You will have to tell him. It won't be pleasant, but has to be done.

[dogsrule]

D-Rule,

Perhaps you're scared because you don't know how he'll handle the split???

He wants you around, but it almost seems as though it's a matter of his comfort in knowing that if something should happen to him, you'll be there.

Who does he have in his family that is willing to take care of him? Maybe he doesn't think any of his children will be bothered with him, and that they'll send him to a nursing home??? He can always get a senior citizen apartment. They have good communities and activities---maybe he'll mix and mingle there ... who knows?

You will have to tell him. It won't be pleasant, but has to be done.

Your right. I went to a counselor today and she said the same thing, if I want a divorce I will have to tell him. I rented this house, put the deposit on and start moving in on the first. Once I am moved in,then I will finish this talk and get it over. Who knows what he will do but at least its out in the open. Your right on the senior apts. Seniors have all sorts of resources.

Thanks much

[JubesInquest]

You're welcome, D-rule.

[dogsrule]

Well, the saga continues.. I am feeling very anxious about moving and cannot wait. I get the keys Monday so its good. I have a lot of stuff packed, separating his from mine. I have changed all the utilities in my name and once I am in, I am asking for the divorce. I have never felt better about it than now.

I took myself to the county fair last night. Saw a great country-western singer and had a great time. I didnt realize until last night how much I have missed being with a man, feeling that excitement and sexuality. I didnt realize how lonely I have become.

[dogsrule]

good news

Well I did it. I asked him for a divorce before we moved into the rental. He took it ok but asked me if I was seeing someone, must be as he couldnt figure out why I wanted to get divorced so fast. I told him because I wanted to start my life over, morrally I could not do that until we were divorced and he can plan his life. He is helping me move and what a great guy. Wish it was this amicable for others to get divorced. I go tomorrow to get the paper work started and because its uncontested, it will only take 10 days here in Oregon.

Thanks for being there for me. I will log on and keep in touch via other threads so I can be motivation or a person to write to that understands them as you all have done for me. God bless you and thank you for being here in this scary time of need. I cannot tell you how much this has mean to me.

[JubesInquest]

Take care D-Rule and keep posting!