[lostinlove123]

oh and yes after we both get our own house get married and get our horse business under way we would like to start a family

[lostinlove123]

he should know that i am up sick worried your right..he knows me very well

[lostinlove123]

I dont know what ill do..i guess ill do what i have been doing leaveing him messages saying " good morning hun i love you" and good night hun i hope you had a good day lov u".....every day thats what i leave him and every day i stay up waiting ..i guess i would tell a girl to just stop messageing him...but i dont know if i can take my own advice..easier said then done i think

[lostinlove123]

this is not like him at all..infact the first year we dated he would get mad if i didnt talk to him for hours..he has always wanted to know how i am or were

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Well there are two things there.

Is he actually alright? Have you checked with his parents if they have heard from him? 4 days and you are saying good morning and goodnight and talking to a "ghost" I'd be checking with his parents and letting them know that you are worried and have not been sleeping "let it slip back to him that he never thought of that" via them.

If you are in contact with them and they have heard from him and he's fine...

DON'T TEXT.

Let him sit back and say ??? She didn't text me??? I don't like playing games and there is no winner and no loser but seriously? I would not text, so he can do the worrying for a change given he knows your nature.

Because honestly if he is okay and ignoring you? I am thinking all your dreams may just be that now, he's with someone over there..and if so I am so sorry hun.

[lostinlove123]

I talk to his mother alot but he does not really talk to her alot.. the last time she talked to him was when i did..she says anyway..I do know he is ok... yesterday i got very stressed for his safety so I called the school to see if he showed up for class..he did. so i know yesterday he was in school..so he is ok ..but im not ok with the being ignored

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Don't text him you deserve to be treated properly...

Don't give him the pleasure of him knowing you are worried and hurt and crying .

Worse scenario, he leaves you but honey if he's ignoring you because (and you've done nothing wrong so it doesn't make sense) he is having a good time with someone? Then there is no "sorry I didn't mean it" given what he is doing to you now is there?

And if he does love you and you don't text him, won't he text you, try to phone you, worry?

Reverse physcology..

But 4 days, being ignored and you are engaged....pfttt lots of people have your goals your dreams ...

[lostinlove123]

Thanks, you really are helping alot.. Its funny im always the one trying to give my friends advice and everyone calls us the "perfect couple"...now it seems things have turned, and im just not thinking clear about all this..hehe look at me its 4am and im still up waiting for him to call or skype me..thats sad. I really love him alot and hope not texting him any more helps. I'll keep you updated on what happen's...if its for the worst its nice to know i have a support team here..thanks

[CHANDLERS WISH]

But that is how it goes We can not think clearly when it is affecting "our" life, when it's not it's really quite crystal clear...

You know, you were both young ,with dreams, goals... Things can change, people change, they mature, get into different surrounds, around different people, maybe he is not now wanting to settle down, maybe he is enjoying some freedom, but he's gutless if that is the case because ignorance is one of the most rudest and hurtful things that anyone can do to someone...

I'd be peeved, I'd be angry, I would let him know you can stand on your own two feet finally..

If it is for the worse? Your exsit was beautiful as well, you can stand with your head held high, "he was discusting, never had the guts, just stopped replying, well I won, because I stopped texting, I won't be treated like that, I am worth something and I deserve better and I haven't spoken to him, even though he keeps texting now" well a little too late...

If it's for good? Then make him suffer, wait and then "talk" about what happened...Why? Ask for the truth and talk openly not angrily let him know even if he's got cold feet, finding different things happening in life, you are open to listen.

Whether you accept that he cheated "if he did" and feels he has spent his whole life so far with one person and likes the freedom, you then have to accept that it may happen again...

A lot to way up but what's important is your dignity, and him earning your respect.

And heck yeah we are here that is what this Forum is all about whether we say things people don't really want to hear, often it helps them in the long run or whether you are just venting, we are here to listen

[MinnieGem]

im sorry to hear what your going thru sweety, id be upset too, but if hes going to school for a month and not calling you everyday I can see how upset you would be, but he's trying to better himself for your guys relationship, doing a course for a month could mean alot of homework/studying etc in order for him to succeed in this program hes taking, you two are engaged you said right, and you have been together for 5 years right, I dont think he would just up and leave he probably has a very good excuse as to why he has not called, i dont believe he is out messing around on you, he is just having a good time with new people which you should be going out and enjoying yourself with your friends and not rush home waiting for his calls like the others have mentioned stop texting stop calling he maybe getting very annoyed over this, i understand you being worried over him not calling all the time, but he did call you and talk to you for 20mins...at the end of the call did he tell you he loved you?? if so you have nothing to be worried about, at the end of this month course and he will be home. Im not trying to sound mean or anything but from a guys perspective the constant calling, texting is showing him your jealous and you dont trust him, i went thru this the first year hubby and i were together and him and i talked and he told me with me calling him and messaging him 24/7 showed a sign of jealousy and trusting issues and he was right i did show a sign of it and we were just fresh in our relationship but once i got over that things were fine, we have been together for 7yrs now and still going strong, there were times when his job needed him away from home for a few days to weeks to months at a time and yes i felt the exact same way but he came home to me, he never always had access to a phone or internet or anything but when i seen him come home to me that was the best feeling. Have faith & trust in your man hun, go and enjoy yourself with your friends and take that course you want to do online, it'll make you feel better about yourself, be independant and not depend on your fiance prove to him you can do things on your own if something were to ever happen...ive learned to do that too cuz what if something physical happened to them say an accident left them in a wheelchair or an accident he was killed in you would have to learn to do things on your own, and thats what i look at, better yourself hunny you will get thru it and he will come walkin in your door when the course is over! Keep your chin up sweety