[Bladyn'smommy16]

sp346. You are right about emotionally abuse being is bad as physical.. It's just as bad in my book too. Yes a woman should not hit her husband either but she didn't hit him he hit her.. If she gave him a black eye I'd say the same thing I am now about him hitting her.. And if she wants to work it out that's her decision. I'm not telling her to do or don't I'm stating my opinion about a man striking his wife and she saying she deserves it in my book that's wrong..

[Stillness]

Are there any other reasons a man would go a little crazy and it would be okay to hit his wife besides cheating?..

If your saying he couldn't help his self I don't believe it.

You're bent on arguing with me for positions I don't hold. I don't know what it is about me or what I said that's making you do it or if you're attaching something else you've experienced to me. (edit)

[Rhonda14]

sp346. You are right about emotionally abuse being is bad as physical.. It's just as bad in my book too. Yes a woman should not hit her husband either but she didn't hit him he hit her.. If she gave him a black eye I'd say the same thing I am now about him hitting her.. And if she wants to work it out that's her decision. I'm not telling her to do or don't I'm stating my opinion about a man striking his wife and she saying she deserves it in my book that's wrong..

But what you have to understand is that THOSE are HER feelings and even if we don't agree with them, they are still HER feelings.

I totally understand what Stillness is saying. When I learned that my husband was having an emotional affair I slapped the hell out of him (yes it left a faint bruise on his face). Am I ashamed of it? Yes, but it was in the heat of the moment and I was beyond ANGRY actually RAGE is a better word. I have never hit him before in our marriage, never even crossed my mind until that night. My world had been shattered. It doesn't make it right but it also doesn't make me a bad person, I am human. I so do not condone abuse of any kind.

[rcoreyus]

To me the one thing that differentiates us from other animals is our ability to be masters of our own actions. Unwillingly giving in to our instincts makes us less human. I like to believe that there is nothing a person could do to me that would make me strike them in rage, though I could imagine committing cold blooded murder.

I also worry that once this line is crossed, it could be crossed again. That said, the poster is completely withing her rights to forgive whatever she wishes.

I always have difficulty with these discussions because cheating just doesn't matter to me. I just don't seem to have the emotion of jealousy.

[Stillness]

I just don't seem to have the emotion of jealousy.

That's interesting. My guess is that you have it, just not in the way that others do or to a lesser extent. Maybe not though. It's a natural aspect of our being - like fear or anger. As long as these things are checked and don't dominate our minds they can be healthy.