[newhere808]

No reason for any flack on this really. If there is something doable, that is positive - why not? Being a healthy weight is different than becoming a walking skeleton. Self confidence covers a much wider range than just attracting dates or being willing to have the lights on during sex. People of both genders should do all that they can to have a healthy lifestyle, attraction and sex can be powerful motivators. Just have reasonable expectations.

Well said, and I couldn't agree more. My ex girlfriend actually helped me get over anxieties of being nude in front of her. I prolly carry about 20 extra lbs or so, even though I hide it well at 6'2" it's different with clothes off. After I was convinced it wasn't an issue things got way more adventerous and spontaneous.

[happy ending]

a christmas present question, i cant really think of a present for my fella for christmas. i even asked him what he wanted - he said a back rub, which i give hime all the time. so i thought some massage oils and a voucher for unlimited back rubs for 2010, is this too lame or is it sweet? be honest now, everyone.

[Texinator]

I don't think that's lame. If he wanted a back rub, the oils and the voucher are a nice touch.

[Mitchel1870]

As a male I asked for vouchers this year as a present. I asked for 1 hour per day of intamacy (i.e. kissing, petting, sex, etc.). I think it is a great idea. The best 'presents' I think are not bought in stores, but given between GF/BF or W/H.

I try and offer hair combings, foot rubs or neck rubs daily.

[danceintx]

I think the massage oils and vouchers would be a very cool idea. Bath and Body have some very good ones.

[happy ending]

thats good, we have a huge income discrepancy, but i would like to give himself he wants, while not spending too much, i wasnt sure if it fell into the cute and romantic or lame and cheap. he loves backrubs, every night he is here we get into it, sometimes its sexual, mainly its just blissful.

[Guest]

a christmas present question, i cant really think of a present for my fella for christmas. i even asked him what he wanted - he said a back rub, which i give hime all the time. so i thought some massage oils and a voucher for unlimited back rubs for 2010, is this too lame or is it sweet? be honest now, everyone.

I don't think that is lame at all.

I would find an unlimited backrub voucher priceless....especially if it was honored without hesistance every time I presented it.

Other reasonably priced gifts - wallet/money clip.....scarf.....leather gloves...home made CD with his current favorite songs....home cooked meal...home cooked cookies/pastries....cologne....which can be bought at discount stores for half the price of Nordstroms/macy's.

If you need more, I will be happy to oblige.

[newhere808]

thats good, we have a huge income discrepancy, but i would like to give himself he wants, while not spending too much, i wasnt sure if it fell into the cute and romantic or lame and cheap. he loves backrubs, every night he is here we get into it, sometimes its sexual, mainly its just blissful.

I've always found stuff like this far more endearing then a new material gift. Backrubs are awesome, with or without bonus treatment, he'll love it.

[Goodgirl93]

Why do some guys like to leave a girl just because they can't get in her pants? This has happened to me in the last few months,and it totally ruined a relationship that should have been more than just sex...And now he texted me today and said he regrets it and will change,and can wait for the sexual relationship.I know he won't,so I am not going to take him back,but I'm just curious to why SOME guys are so eager for sex,when they know the woman is not willing to give it to him? Am I just choosing the wrong men?

[newhere808]

Why do some guys like to leave a girl just because they can't get in her pants? This has happened to me in the last few months,and it totally ruined a relationship that should have been more than just sex...And now he texted me today and said he regrets it and will change,and can wait for the sexual relationship.I know he won't,so I am not going to take him back,but I'm just curious to why SOME guys are so eager for sex,when they know the woman is not willing to give it to him? Am I just choosing the wrong men?

To be fair, I know women who have left guys because they didn't give it up either. They blammed it on them being to immature for an adult relationship, and called it off.

The only answer I can offer is that both men and women like this aren't looking for an actual relationship, they are looking for something "lighter", that offers more enjoyment up front. These days casual sex is getting more an more common between both sexes, and so many people assume that if you have not had sex by "x" age or after "x" relationships then your behind the curve.

I say stick to your values, and it may be worth it to look for a different kind of guy if you find that the usual ones you go for fall under the same stereotype. I was 23 when I finally had sex, and it was after I was with my girlfriend for a year and a half. Some really upsetting circumstances ended it a year and a half, but I had fully intended on committing to this woman, so the decision was clear to me.