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  • Texinator
    Veteran Member
    • Sep 2009
    • 5556

    Originally posted by caterpillar79
    Sexual compatibility is a huge factor that drives the marriages or civil partnerships forward or back. Education is a must.
    Yep, and I think teaching the importance of communication should be a huge component of that education. How many people are sexually incompatible not really cause their natural drives are dissimilar but because they can't/won't tell each other what they like? Sex should be about SHARING intimacy and pleasure, not about everyone just trying to 'get theirs'. It's only natural then for the person that finds the sex to be less than fulfilling to be less interested in sex as well. If it's not fun, why do it, they think?

    Communication is especially important because men and women often have different ideas of what's arousing and pleasing. For example he might be happy enough hammering away for a few minutes but that's probably not going to make her happy. And he probably won't get it unless they communicate. And then she ends up not liking sex and he ends up frustrated, and they're the stereotypical oversexed husband and cold wife.

    One unfortunate obstacle to this is the mentality that men that like sex are men and women that like sex are ****s. Of course communication is going to be more difficult if she is afraid to communicate an interest in sex in the first place out of fear of coming across as immoral. Then there is also the belief that men should be happy enough with the physical aspect, and they might then be afraid to communicate what their emotional needs are out of fear of coming across as weak.

    Comment

    • WildChild
      Banned
      • Sep 2008
      • 14142

      Agreed. Some people make communicating about sex difficult or touchy. They get defensive or simply tune out. This can make resolving problems really difficult

      Comment

      • caterpillar79
        Veteran Member
        • Mar 2009
        • 3895

        Originally posted by Tex
        ....One unfortunate obstacle to this is the mentality that men that like sex are men and women that like sex are ****s....
        You mentioned plenty of stereotypes which all have truthful basis, but this one struck me the most!

        Women are deemed and branded ****s if they do such, and how about men?

        When I was in college, I was surprised to be told that there are also male prostitutes.

        Comment

        • WildChild
          Banned
          • Sep 2008
          • 14142

          Isn't it interesting though that we have no specific terms for male prostitutes or those who are sexually "loose"?

          Comment

          • Texinator
            Veteran Member
            • Sep 2009
            • 5556

            Shows how uneven the playing field is. Why should women feel ashamed of liking sex? Why does that make them ****s? I don't get it.

            Comment

            • Mes T
              Veteran Member
              • Oct 2009
              • 2678

              I've heard the term "man-wh*re" quite often. But the same for a woman would just be "wh*re," not even "woman-wh*re." Boo.

              Originally posted by Tex
              Shows how uneven the playing field is. Why should women feel ashamed of liking sex? Why does that make them ****s? I don't get it.
              Yep! Absolutely ridiculous and pointless, but here's to stayin' positive and waiting for people who still have that mentality to gently die out. Yay!

              Comment

              • Texinator
                Veteran Member
                • Sep 2009
                • 5556

                Just tell them you love a fantastic orgasm. That'll make their heads explode.

                Comment

                • caterpillar79
                  Veteran Member
                  • Mar 2009
                  • 3895

                  Which head, Tex?

                  Comment

                  • Texinator
                    Veteran Member
                    • Sep 2009
                    • 5556

                    Big one. I don't think guys that think like that can get much use out of the little one.

                    Comment

                    • StillLearnin
                      Veteran Member
                      • Oct 2009
                      • 260

                      Originally posted by WildChild
                      Isn't it interesting though that we have no specific terms for male prostitutes or those who are sexually "loose"?
                      There are a few other terms, but they aren't used very much.

                      satyriasis - n. Excessive, often uncontrollable sexual desire in and behavior by a man

                      or

                      Don Juan - used synonymously for "womanizer", especially in Spanish slang, and the term Don Juanism is sometimes used as a synonym for satyriasis.

                      I personally prefer to be called a "man !" I realize that I don't get paid for my services. Not in cash anyway.

                      Comment

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