[CHANDLERS WISH]

anything I usully read the exact opposte from men on different forums. That they actually want their women to intiate sex more often and find it a huge turn on.

Well what about pratical?

All a woman has to do is smile, wiggle, lossen a strap and it's initiating... So what about when he sees that and goes, "na, I'm too stressed, or the football is about to start, or she will want oral first, not just "sex".....

Trust me, there are just as many women on "Forums" that complain re the above

[WildChild]

True. I'm shure there are alot of men out there who doesn't like it when the woman intiates sex... But to say that most men find it a turn off is defenitley not true from my experiences.

Your experience is not all men's experience.
I love sex and would happily have it daily. I no longer even attempt to initiate because I've been shut down so many times and have been told repeatedly that it is irritating and he resents it. This isn't the first man I've encountered this with. In fact my experience has led me to the conclusion that much as men liketo complain about women not wanting it, it's largely a cover because they are never going to admit to another man that they don't want it as much as she does.

[ItsASecret]

Personally I do not initiate sex, well actually I have but I can probably count the number of times on one hand in the 2 1/2 years or whatever my boyfriend and I have been together. Why? Because I do not like being in control. I am an extremely passive, shy, and self-conscious woman. The thought of 'taking control' is actually a turn off for me. I have never been a person to take the reins in any situation sexual or not...it just is not me. I do not sit there salivating to the thought of "man I would love to jump on his dong right now". A part of the reason is because I would be embarrassed simply due to me being so passive and quiet. I keep my emotions to myself, I am not some bubbly go get-er so if I am actually horny I often will start kissing him and then he makes the moves towards sex from there. But I will never say things like "omg lets totally have sex right now I am so flippin horny!". However if he is really horny and lets me know then I am not going to deny him sex or oral or whatever form of pleasure he wants.

[stressed]

In fact my experience has led me to the conclusion that much as men liketo complain about women not wanting it, it's largely a cover because they are never going to admit to another man that they don't want it as much as she does.

I so agree with this.

[Guest]

Your experience is not all men's experience.
I love sex and would happily have it daily. I no longer even attempt to initiate because I've been shut down so many times and have been told repeatedly that it is irritating and he resents it. This isn't the first man I've encountered this with. In fact my experience has led me to the conclusion that much as men liketo complain about women not wanting it, it's largely a cover because they are never going to admit to another man that they don't want it as much as she does.

True. I'm just saying I usually hear the exact opposite from other men, that they think it's a turn on when the woman intiates sex.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Fox,

Your "reading"..

What about practical?

Have you personally, experienced women initiating sex? Or are you new at all of this, ie) young and are taking the words of men on Forums, who by the way, may never actually make a woman feel comfortable to do so, or purely only try to "get sex" from their partners and so therefore, don't understand, that a kiss on the forehead or a touch of the arm when walking past for no reason "is foreplay" and "is love" and from that, a woman "will" get weak at the knees as she feels love.

Most of what I have read on "Men's Forums", the men, are complaining about not having enough sex, and the women are stating that's because you make me feel like it's just "sex"...

[WildChild]

True. I'm just saying I usually hear the exact opposite from other men, that they think it's a turn on when the woman intiates sex.

They might like it once or twice - a year, but that's about it.
Read through the sex forum. You'll find thread after thread about this. Women want it, the men don't.
Woman tries to initiate, he shuts down; too tired, too stressed, not tonight dear, I've got a headache.
He masterbates daily, turns her down.

Men aren't honest with each other about this stuff. There are societal expectations that they just can't face if they were honest about it. Truth is I think there are as many men with problems with sexual disfuction or lack of interest as there are women with these problems.

Another aspect of this, I've dealt with is; he complains about feeling pressured to have sex if she tries to initiate, she backs off and then he gets upset that he doesn't think she wants it anymore. WT?
There are too many of both genders who are for what ever reason are unable to communicate their needs and desires regarding sex and for many women a lot of their reluctance to communicate about sex come from dealing with men who absolutely will not listen. It upsets their sense of manliness or something to actually learn what the woman they are with wants rather than do something they saw in some porn flick.

Both men and women are born sexual beings and then warped by weird social stuff. Neither men or women are born knowing what it take to be a good lover. Until we can get past some the nonsense like the idea that the man should always lead and know more, we will continue to have less than satisfactory sex lives.

[Guest]

They might like it once or twice - a year, but that's about it.
Read through the sex forum. You'll find thread after thread about this. Women want it, the men don't.
Woman tries to initiate, he shuts down; too tired, too stressed, not tonight dear, I've got a headache.
He masterbates daily, turns her down.

Men aren't honest with each other about this stuff. There are societal expectations that they just can't face if they were honest about it. Truth is I think there are as many men with problems with sexual disfuction or lack of interest as there are women with these problems.

Another aspect of this, I've dealt with is; he complains about feeling pressured to have sex if she tries to initiate, she backs off and then he gets upset that he doesn't think she wants it anymore. WT?
There are too many of both genders who are for what ever reason are unable to communicate their needs and desires regarding sex and for many women a lot of their reluctance to communicate about sex come from dealing with men who absolutely will not listen. It upsets their sense of manliness or something to actually learn what the woman they are with wants rather than do something they saw in some porn flick.

Both men and women are born sexual beings and then warped by weird social stuff. Neither men or women are born knowing what it take to be a good lover. Until we can get past some the nonsense like the idea that the man should always lead and know more, we will continue to have less than satisfactory sex lives.

Are you serious? You must be living in opposite land or something. As far as I know, most men want sex several times a day while women maybe only wants it once a month.

[LanaBear]

There are plenty plenty plenty of threads here that are just the opposite.

Maybe us of WH land are a rare species...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

No, you need to do exactly what was suggested by WC actually, and start reading on this Forum, which by the way is a popular Forum, so you can do your stats.

Mulder, you haven't answered my question? See, these "men" that are telling you, may also be lying, to cover the fact that they don't want it as much and you keep talking about "sex"... which is why we aren't that into it...

Sex, is spontaneous and great when in that mood... But what about making love? Have you asked your "men" that question? If they know how to? If they can make a woman orgasm time and time again where she way wants it?