IMO insisting on fidelity and denying your SO sex is a form of abuse and in some states denying sex is grounds for divorce. many attorneys offer a free initial consultation to allow you to see if you want to work with them and them to see if yours is a case they would want to be involved in. Why not contact one or two and get educated about the legal process in your state? You have a touchy situation with your health and employment concerns combined with having a child in the middle of this.
I don't know what to say about what your wife may be thinking, I know a number of lesbians and women who are bi. Lesbians vary widely in their attitudes toward men, some simple hate them, others like them as people but go eeoooow yuck at the idea of contact with a penis, as you move toward the bi end of that spectrum the ick factor lessens and melds into desire. I assume you had some discussion early on about why she was choosing to leave the world of lesbian sex/relationships and get into a relationship with a man?
I've known people (male and female) who have gone back and forth repeatedly. I had one gf that ran through a string of changes.
Oh Joe is wonderful. The sex is fantastic!
2 weeks later-
That blankety, blank, blank, so and so. I hate men!
One month later-
Suzie is so incredible. Being with a woman is bliss.
3 months later-
That lesbian betch!! What a ho! Why did I think women were better?
6 months later-
Stanley is great! What a wonderful man!
2 months later
That lying cheating SOB! What was I thinking!
Repeat ad nauseam
It is unlikely that she has entirely lost her desire for women and it is possible that being with a man was more or less an experimental thing although she may not have thought so at the time the two of you got together. Many gay couples go through the same ups and downs that straight couples do and their sex lives can end up just as stale or one or both may lose their desire. Do you know what happened in her past relationships? What is her relationship pattern?
I don't know what to say about what your wife may be thinking, I know a number of lesbians and women who are bi. Lesbians vary widely in their attitudes toward men, some simple hate them, others like them as people but go eeoooow yuck at the idea of contact with a penis, as you move toward the bi end of that spectrum the ick factor lessens and melds into desire. I assume you had some discussion early on about why she was choosing to leave the world of lesbian sex/relationships and get into a relationship with a man?
I've known people (male and female) who have gone back and forth repeatedly. I had one gf that ran through a string of changes.
Oh Joe is wonderful. The sex is fantastic!
2 weeks later-
That blankety, blank, blank, so and so. I hate men!
One month later-
Suzie is so incredible. Being with a woman is bliss.
3 months later-
That lesbian betch!! What a ho! Why did I think women were better?
6 months later-
Stanley is great! What a wonderful man!
2 months later
That lying cheating SOB! What was I thinking!
Repeat ad nauseam
It is unlikely that she has entirely lost her desire for women and it is possible that being with a man was more or less an experimental thing although she may not have thought so at the time the two of you got together. Many gay couples go through the same ups and downs that straight couples do and their sex lives can end up just as stale or one or both may lose their desire. Do you know what happened in her past relationships? What is her relationship pattern?
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