[Texinator]

the vast majority of men would rather have sex with their female partner than do it themselves.

In theory. In reality, however, the problem is that many men also consider good sex to be limited to satisfying their own desires: to be able to have sex with her when they want and how they want. She's supposed to be a living sex toy that caters to their wishes without expecting much, if anything in return. Then they wonder why their partner might not be so enthusiastic; it's not that she doesn't like sex, she just doesn't like sex much with the guy who wants to "get his" two minutes before the sports news starts.

Women do not have as high sex drives as man. Fact.

Most women don't go bragging about their sex drives. A big reason is because society still thinks sexual men are simply men, whereas sexual women are "dirty ****s." Many men do go bragging about their sex drives, even if they don't have one, because they want to live up to the image of the strong, sexual man. So the idea that men prefer sex more than women do is an illusion based on illusions.

Every woman is an individual, and so some women will have lower sex drives and some will have higher drives. However, if I wanted to generalize, I'd say that if there is a strong emotional connection and she knows that he cares about her sexual desires, then the average woman has a higher sex drive than the average man. If I really, really wanted to generalize, I'd say men prefer penile stimulation, women prefer good, mutually satisfying sex.

When you think about it as well, how much effort is it to give your man a quick hand job when he needs it? Five minutes!

It's not just about effort, it's also about mood. If she's not feeling horny, then a hand job isn't going to be much fun for her. If he constantly demands she do something she doesn't find fun... she's going to resent it even more!

To use another example, some men can't help but push down her head while she's giving oral sex, because they want her to take them deeper and deeper. If she found that fun and enjoyable, she'd be doing it already. So is forcing her head down suddenly going to make her like deep throating? Derp, herp, dur... no, if anything, she's going to dislike it even more.

Basic human psychology.

[ItsASecret]

All I'm saying, and sticking rigidly to the point here, is that those women who complain need to to check the vital signs first before accepting that it is only he with the "problem"

So to sum up, if he wants it she should come to his beck and call because he is in the mood despite how she feels at the time? Kind of like, my penis is up right now so do something about it because I want something done about it. Is your checklist basically saying do your man whenever he wants because that is the way it should be?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

LMAO WC...

Oh Thomas sorry hun, but see you have now met the Queen Goddess of Sex, so your match on that statement

[renaissanceman]

never forget

I think what you are saying is "ladies", please, consider instead of being hurt over his masterbations, work out if there is a sexual problem in your relationship and perhaps give a little more, because if you ignore for long periods of time, not even a bj, then what is a man mean't to do?

Would that be fair?

Well you are a young man.

I think a good rule of thumb would be to hold your partner's sexual needs right up their with your own. You can't put them first because they could take advantage, and you can't put you first because you could do the same.

Not always true in every case, but don't forget that there are two people in the relationship.

-Ren

[renaissanceman]

In theory. In reality, however, the problem is that many men also consider good sex to be limited to satisfying their own desires: to be able to have sex with her when they want and how they want.

From my experience this is not just an issue with men. Women also seek control in the bedroom and don't always have their partner's satisfaction on their mind.

-Ren

[Elanor-Jane]

I'm not necessarily saying that it will definately turn into that, just saying that porn opens the door for weird fetishes which could be anything- for some it is children, some use violence, etc. These odd fetishes often lead to crimes such as rape and doing other 'unnatural' sex acts. No, this is not always the case. But porn is highly addictive and can lead to what I said above.

There is nothing wrong with fetish or "unnatural" sex personally I'm not just doing it for reproductions sake lol

As for the subject at hand, I think many men assume women have low sex drives because women don't enjoy it as much as they could. I had a low sex drive until I discovered it could be really good. Some men just don't make it fun enough for their partners so why would they be begging for more and appearing to have a sex drive. Average selfish male lovers breed low sex drives in women in my opinion.

[Elanor-Jane]

Fanks!

[Hopeless Dork]

Most women don't go bragging about their sex drives. A big reason is because society still thinks sexual men are simply men, whereas sexual women are "dirty ****s." Many men do go bragging about their sex drives, even if they don't have one, because they want to live up to the image of the strong, sexual man. So the idea that men prefer sex more than women do is an illusion based on illusions.

^^ This.

Men being these always horny always ready to go energizer bunnies is a MYTH.. Yes, there are men that could go 10 times a day and woman that could go that much as well but those are outside the norm. Most men have sex drives that fall more to center than high or low. And I think the same goes for women... HOWEVER,

Women don't get the luxary of knowing they will have an orgasm EVERY time they have sex... um, most men DO. If sex occurs, most men know, they are going to get off, that is just a given. Sex STARTS with their erection and ends with their orgasm in many many relationships.

So yeah, would guys be crazy about jumping in the sack everytime his chick snapped her fingers if he knew that he was going only be allowed to ejaculate maybe 1 out of 10 times, if that? Probably not.

I'm one of the lucky ones in that my man actually knows my body, has learned my body and WANTS to make me come and is successful in doing so 99 percent of the time, and that other 1 percent is when my head just isn't in the game (happens to the best of us :P lol)

But women are taught early on that having sex makes you a sloot, liking sex makes you a nympho sloot, not likeing sex makes youa frigid cow... bleah bleah bleah... it takes having a good sense of your self and sexuality to break free of all the nurturing we've gotten that we are to be objectified when it comes to sex, not actually enjoy it. And then having an awesome guy that cares to figure us out, well that just seals the deal.

But short of that you are left with those myths that women don't want sex and men are animals always wanting to hump. Read the forums more often thomas -- you'll ready more than a couple new woman a day complain their partners don't want sex as often as they do.

[Texinator]

Man: "I like sex"
Society: "Right on!"

Woman: "I like sex!"
Society: "Tramp! Skank!"
Woman: "Uh... ok, so I don't like sex?"
Society: "Dead fish! Typical woman!"
Woman: "Then what's the right answer?!"
Society: "Change the subject!"

[Hopeless Dork]

lol.. so very true and in lots of cases those reactions come from the same guy toward the same woman... like those guys that want this virginal pure woman... then are sexually frustrated that she doesn't want to be intimate with them... they realize they want the woman to be sexual, so she finally breaks free and becomes that way than they back down and wonder if they've created a monster. I think some men want a woman to be sexual, but on THEIR terms, not before say they say they can be, and not when they don't want them to be and thats just STOOPID.