[Obelisk]

Now we're getting somewhere

Thanks so far ladies (and gentlemen) for your input so far. A lot of my fears have indeed been eased in regards to this. I still wish I was a bit bigger (and will keep working on it) but I don't feel tiny anymore, and do have my confidence somewhat to not be afraid about what a woman would think/feel about my size.

Lizzard, yes your husband is huge lol. Honestly I'd be happy with your previous dude's size, but even what I have now will be big for smaller women, so if I at some point in the future I need to find someone I kind of know what to look for.

[lizzardb63]

yes lol
Forget about the men you have been with and whom you liked the most or the least. Think strictly about the sizes you have had. Think about the biggest, think about the smallest, and think about the one that felt just right.

The smallest: I was 20 years old, a virgin. He was my boyfriend of 3 months. We drank too much, started fooling around and he put it in. I said no...he stopped, did it again, I said no again, he stopped and he tried a 3rd time so I got dressed and left, and that was the last time we spoke. I was so confused by how I felt and what I felt (physically). He was very small... I couldn't tell you what size i thought he was because obviously at the time I didn't have anything to compare him with. He knew i was a virgin and knew how I felt about it, but did the wrong thing anyway, even after I said no a couple times (and it's not like we started and in the middle i said stop. I said stop right away).

The biggest: my husband. The first time we had sex my first thought when he entered was "holy crap...he is huge, I'm not sure if I can do this forever" and it wasn't that it was painful or unpleasurable, but it was just a tight squeeze. My ex before him was about 1-2" smaller than him so I was used to that, but the way he made me feel (emotionally) and how he made me feel like the sexiest woman on this earth made the sex better than I've ever had before. My ex didn't have a "small" penis, but he didn't make me feel the rawness or emotions that my husband does. It's the connection that makes the sex that much better.

I've had penises of different sizes and the "good sex" boiled down to how he made me feel emotionally and how he made me feel about myself. Penis size is secondary, but that's just my opinion.

[FortunsFoole]

I'm way more on the emotional aspect of what attracts me to a man or woman, but I don't know if any of this would be helpful.

In my experience perfect in relation to just size was 5 1/2. There was very little need for adjustment. Everything seemed to fit just right. That bottom out feeling he could manage just plowing away without hurting me. Everything else was lacking and we as people weren't a good fit. It also always hurt initially having sex. Just throwing that out there.

Now the person I'm married to I had anxiety the first time I saw him. I was a little scared. He's never measured but estimates under 7. My first thought was "this is going to hurt". I happened to be more attracted to him and into the moment than I'd ever been, this was before seeing or feeling his penis size, and it ended up not hurting--despite my anxiety.

In regards to the pressure of vaginal size. I don't think it's an issue because it's such an adaptable orifice. It's designed also to birth babies with over a foot of head circumference. It's extremely adaptable.

It's been my experience that no matter the size of the penis, or even birthing children, the vagina adapts to the size. The difference is what is done to reach an aroused state to make the difference between a painful or pleasurable sexual experience.

[Stillness]

My wife and I are both Jehovah's Witnesses. We started dating before we got involved and got married before we became members.

It's cool if you like science a lot. But it's good if you realize that your feeling that it's the best, like your preference in color or ice cream flavors, is subjective. And contrasting science and religion is like contrasting hammers and marriage.

[Obelisk]

I'm one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

Cool man, I have a couple of Jehova's Witness friends. I guess I would call myself Christian although a much weaker one than I used to be in my 20's.

Is your wife the same faith? If so, no wonder she was uncomfortable with the "fornicating". I'm actually surprised she had previous partners to you.

Getting a bit personal aren't you? :P

I don't mean to insult I really do want to know your opinion based on how physically it's felt for you. I just have a hard time believing that if a woman had a guy with a 9" penis, then went to a guy with a 4" penis, that there won't be some level of sensation lost there. I mean, physically you'll definitely feel less of it, so there's no question there. The question becomes, was that extra sensation not pleasurable? If it wasn't, then I can see how the size difference might not matter much. Maybe you're one of these women who gets nothing from being "bottomed out"? Maybe really large does hurt, and you're glad to get smaller again that actually feels good with no pain?

That's kind of what I want to know.

I wonder if people hide behind science as they fear the un-known.. Science to them makes sense, the un-known doesn't but does to those that believe, that being that there are other aspects that don't add up to science.

Science is an awesome tool, and really the only method that has actually increased the quality of life of humanity as a whole. I will paraphrase the late Carl Sagan with something he said that impacted me quite a bit:

"When someone is sick with a throat infection, do we gather to pray for the individual? Or do we give them 500mg of Amoxicillin ever 8 hours for a period of 7 days? Which one is more likely to be effective in eliminating the infection?"

I would say religion, more that science is what people use to hide from the unknown. Not to say that I am not religious myself. I am. I just had to balance my beliefs with what science is showing me, and to come to some type of understanding to balance the two things. Anyway don't want to derail the thread, the religion topics might be for another thread.

Don't knock science though. It brought us condoms, birth control pills, vasectomies, and ways to control and enjoy sex without having to continually endure possible unwanted children. If now it could figure out how to remove the sex drive permanently of those of us that don't want it, we'd be set

If your Father was a good Father and you have some heart and you do, then your girlfriend is right and so am I

My dad is great. I'm glad he had me at a young age (he was 22) so that I can hopefully have him around for a long time to come. Gf is sweet inside, but has some serious quirks that I'm trying to wrap my mind around. You women tend to be erratic sometimes

I can honestly state and I think that I have, that in my 20's, I had the smallest but the foreplay he inflicted on me, made him the biggest I will never ever forget that.

Cool. Do you remember what small was in this case? Less than 4"? I honestly think there probably is no major difference in feeling for a woman between 4" and 6". If you go below 4" you start running into problems, and above 6" you start getting into territory the woman might like, or might feel painful. Seems to be a roll of the dice. Your personal experience would help me understand this more to go beyond the hypothetical scenarios

The one that fits just right? Well again, it's about the way he touches me, treats me and makes me feel all woman, and knows my body and he is maybe a touch above the average size.

Cool. So above average, we are talking about what? 6"? 7"? Thanks for your honesty. I totally get that it's not a huge deal for you as long as the man has those outside the bedroom qualities. It's still something that's sort of a bonus to you if the guy has it though, right? That's kind of what I'm sensing you mean.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Forget about the men you have been with and whom you liked the most or the least. Think strictly about the sizes you have had. Think about the biggest, think about the smallest, and think about the one that felt just right.

was the one that felt the best closer to the large or to the small side?

Getting a bit personal aren't you? :P

Firstly, I believe people do think, either Scientifically or Spiritually. Not discussing "church" faith, rather just spiritual. I wonder if people hide behind science as they fear the un-known.. Science to them makes sense, the un-known doesn't but does to those that believe, that being that there are other aspects that don't add up to science.

If your Father was a good Father and you have some heart and you do, then your girlfriend is right and so am I

Now, to your question .

I can honestly state and I think that I have, that in my 20's, I had the smallest but the foreplay he inflicted on me, made him the biggest I will never ever forget that.

The one that fits just right? Well again, it's about the way he touches me, treats me and makes me feel all woman, and knows my body and he is maybe a touch above the average size... But, I absolutely love his qualities outside the bedroom as well, and that honestly makes me want to be with him in the bedroom so I honestly have to again state, it's not about the penis it's about the way he uses it, coupled with the way he is in person and how I know any intimacy with him is real.... That's why I am marrying him.

[Stillness]

Stillness, if you don't mind me asking, what's your faith?

I'm one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

[Obelisk]

Stillness, if you don't mind me asking, what's your faith?

[Stillness]

There are a few women out there that don't want children. My wife is one of them. We've been married for 13 years and she has not wavered one bit. Even as she's approaching the late 30's her desire doesn't seem to be changing. All of that ticking biological clock stuff - not true. We're all individuals. Even women.

I'm on the fence. I have been since the beginning and haven't changed much either. I tend to side much more with never having them too. It was a conversation we had before we got married. My biggest fear is that she'll regret it.

We have a lot of friends that are couples that I know don't want or never had them and more that are childless that I haven't had that conversation with. I suspect that a lot of the latter don't want children either. I think it's a lot more common in my faith than in the general population, though.

[Obelisk]

You now have this perception that if you find a woman who has a small vagina canal you are in..

yes lol

The point being, it's anyone's guess as to how a child turns out and a child must be loved to be bought into this World, a child born by you, could have had the best life on non-insecurities because what you didn't like you would ensure your child did not get the same treatment.

See, I believe this is wishful thinking. This is exactly what my gf said to me. My dad is a great dad. He's not perfect, but he has always been there for me. Even with the major fighting that was going on when I was kid, he was still trying to explain to me that it wasn't me, and that they both loved me.

So barring everything else, my parents are actually decent people who had to deal with very human problems as everyone else does. I basically became counsellor for both my mom and my dad for a while, but only because I was able to change my own life around due to my desire for perfection. I hate not being able to change something that I can't. If I can change it, I throw every recourse into changing it. But I still resent the fact that I was deal a pretty bad hand when it comes to certain things in my looks.

I'm proud of what I've achieved and what I've become, but I don't love myself nor hold myself in any sort of high esteem, and never will. All I've been able to do is use science and knowledge to stave off the constant attacks by society conform to certain norms. I just can't see myself bringing all this burden to a poor kid that never asked to be born. If I had the choice to have never been born, I'd choose it without hesitation.

I wish you would see that you are living in your past and fearing your own past bringing that all into the present.

I suppose so. The only way I could escape my past is hiding from it. That's what it feels like right now.

One size fits all. What ever your size it fits. The only difference is if the woman is not being bought to intimacy, she may very well just have the in's and out's and consequently doesn't contract and consequently opens up wider.. This is not necessarily her fault nor is it a matter of how many penises she has had or what sizes she has had. If a man knows how to make love to "his" woman and her him, then she feels it all and so does he.

No, I think there's more biomechanics to it than that. I know I asked in one of the other threads and I'll ask again. This time I'll ask you specifically:

Forget about the men you have been with and whom you liked the most or the least. Think strictly about the sizes you have had. Think about the biggest, think about the smallest, and think about the one that felt just right.

was the one that felt the best closer to the large or to the small side?