[Ever2]

Hi,I am a married woman in my mid 40s.
My life has been turned on it's ear lately as I have developed extreme hypersexuality,apparently due to a premenopausal libido spike,
which I am told can last from 1-5 years!
My husband and I were teen sweetheart,in fact I lost my virginity to him at the age of 14(he was 18).
We always had great sex(he gave me my first orgasm and first multiple orgasm and my first G-spot orgasm).
But being so young ,we eventually broke up,when our separate ways,met other people etc.
10 yrs later we found each other again.
My sex drive was always a little higher than his but not as to be a problem....until recently.
Suddenly,my libido has gone through the roof!I masturbate anywhere from 5 to 20 times a day,(with help from my husband whenever possible).I crave sex constantly(3 times in the last 24 hours,on top of everything else).I came 4 time in one 1 hour car trip yesterday! And bent over to pick up an item at a sale and...you guessed it :/ I literally ache down there ,getting increasing more painful until I can have an orgasm.I have difficulty climaxing with masturbation alone ,though visualizing(always him doing stuff to me)helps.But my husband can "finish me off" in a matter of moments.My orgasms with him are like nothing I have ever experienced before. Mind blowing, literally screaming, climaxes,blinding pleasure,verging on pain,(which I seem to have a much higher tolerance for)that can go for an hour at a time! i.e Last night,we tried spanking,something I have always wanted to try but felt too shy to ask.I also though I would just hurt a bit,I wouldn't like it and that would be it.Without talking about it first,I simply handed him a wooden spoon.He instantly turned and used it perfectly on my bare bottom,harder than I would have expected but just amazing!(I would like to incorporate it daily if I could).This was after he had already given me deep,hard sex with the sexiest continuous eye contact ever.I am so in love with him.I look at him and truly think he is the most beautiful man.He is a tradesman and his hands are large and rough I have very soft skin and the combination is electric!He touches me like no one else has ever managed.In fact the idea of anyone else touching me has gone from "not interested" to physically making my skin craw.
He has suggested introducing "toys" to make it easier for both of us.And a lady I've spoken to with the same issue suggested trying all the things we were too embarrassed to talk about before,we are trying but it's still embarrassing! Watching porn together is another suggestion that really excites me.I'm not sure how he will feel about it though and am scared he will be upset with me when he realizes I've been watching it by myself for days.He is a very quiet man,and I would love him to speak more during intercourse and foreplay.Telling me what he is going to do,asking me how it feels etc.But hopefully,that may come with time. My major problem is,He is tired.He works hard and now I am asking him to "service" me several times a night and in various different ways. He has been really understanding most of the time but can be quite short with me later,when the moment arises.Which makes me feel rejected and like some kind of demanding freak.What can I do? He is literally the only person who can get me where I "need to go".If I don't get to orgasm when I need it,and I mean NEED it,I can't sleep and can't think straight and ache painfully.So I try to do it to myself but the more stressed and upset I get the more difficult that is and I just end up sore,unsatisfied and sad.After the stuff he did to me last night and the stuff I did to myself,I can hardly sit down today I am so sore.And in the past we would have not has sex for a couple of days and then had gentle sex until I was ready again but that is not an option.Not to mention that it actually turns me on to know he made me sore and to remember how.I know I am expecting too much of him(he is still asleep at 11 am which is very late for him).I'm also worried I am not pleasing him.I do touch him etc (I absolutely love giving him oral as I find his penis extremely attractive) but I hate that it suddenly is all about me.I don't have very good self esteem at the best of times so if he says no it is devastating.
There are certain drugs that can be used to lessen the condition but I have sever allergies and am unable to take them.
We also have 4 children(3 x teenagers and 1 x grown up ) so taking it out of the bedroom is tricky because of noise etc. If anyone has experience with this kind of problem ,please let me know what I can do.I am terrified of loosing him.I so want to make him happy and for us to learn to enjoy this together but am at a total loss and so scared I will loose the love of my life.

[jen1447]

Hehe, is this for real? I thought I was highly sexed, but masturbating 20 times a day, one hour orgasms .....? (I've heard of the mythical one hour orgasm / tantric type thing or whatever, but honestly I really doubt it's possible. I mean like not actually orgasming that whole time. If you're talking a single, that would be insane, and even straight multiples lasting an hour would probably kill you.)

If this is really happening Ever2, you should probably see your doctor right away. It seems like it would quickly take over your life, and I can't see how it would be manageable with two kids still at home. Never mind wearing out your man, you've got bigger health problems. Now, if you're just exaggerating and your libido has just taken a leap (one minute orgasms instead of one hour for example lol), it's not so serious I don't suppose. If you really think it's disruptive and potentially a health issue, see your doctor. Otherwise I'd think you could just 'ride' it out. LOL

[Stillness]

I am terrified of loosing him.I so want to make him happy and for us to learn to enjoy this together but am at a total loss and so scared I will loose the love of my life.

I don't understand this. Why is there a risk of losing him? I've never heard of anyone leaving their spouse because they're too horny.

[kira]

Sounds like my late teens early 20s lol I tended to just run it all together though. Instead of masturbating 20 times I'd do it for 4 hours through multiple orgasms.

[Ever2]

I don't understand this. Why is there a risk of losing him? I've never heard of anyone leaving their spouse because they're too horny.

I'm scared of loosing him because of the constant pressure to perform.Any intimacy in our relationship just becomes about him having to please me.And he is missing our on sleep every day.This isn't normal "horny".I don't want him to start resenting me.It would probably be easier if I was not in a relationship and was ok with multiple partners,but that isn't the case so it's just me and him.I was just hoping someone on here would have had or know of anyone in a similar situation.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Hi Ever.

This is certainly not un-common and so many women ask the same question and can't quite get a grip on it, or answers from just the internet.

I can see why you are worried. Let's face it, a nymphomaniac wants sex constant, on-going, day in day out, multiple times a guy has to keep up and if not, though intercourse, assist in other ways on-going. Makes perfect sense to me why you are worried.

Why the change? What allergies do you have? What is your work condition like?

You may be experiencing hypersexuality, in which the body builds up chemicals and causes a higher sex drive than what you are used to. I don't believe though that you are a sex addict which can come from that, rather there are things happening within your life, this is an addition, it's the relieve from it and because you are giving yourself the rush, it's asking for more and more.

What is your work situation like and honestly, your home life like take the sex out of it.

CW

[Ever2]

What it did was scare the hell out of us actually.It was almost unbearably painful after about 5 minutes.By the time we got to our small country hospital I was doubled over and sobbing and it left my husband,the kind of guy who takes great pride in caring for is family,feeling helpless.As a result I have now had various heart,lungs,blood pressure (every few days),hormone tests including continuous heart monitoring over 24 hrs and then again for a full week.(I wonder what the tech thought when they had to decipher those results)! Thankfully,it all seems ok,so far.Of course there is an issue with skin irritation,tearing and occasional bleeding etc.We(myself,along with my GP,a senior M.D and now a gynecologial specialist) have tried different treatments,none of which have worked so far and because of my allergies to many medications are off the table.Though a few alleviated some of the physical symptoms for a short period of time(from topical numbing creams to anesthetic injected directly into the aroused area,which yes,is just as bad as it sounds).There is no magic pill that will fix it.We are using some of the muscle relaxing treatments and have take up swimming to help with the tightening and cramps in my thigh, pelvic ,bottom, abdominal and foot muscles.Cramps due to "extreme toe curling " amuses him greatly lol.Before this started I was also quite over weight but have so far lost nearly 20 kgs and have increasingly defined muscle tone,so there is one bonus :/ .I am also seeing a psychologist who is trying to deal with my feelings of guilt and isolation.(before anyone asks ,no I am not Bi-Polar and was not sexually abused as a child).We did go to a marriage/couples councilor but were pretty unimpressed as he seemed to think we were "looking a gift horse in the mouth".As far as the kids go,we are lucky that it is school holidays atm.They have spent a week at their Grandparent's and a week at our eldest house(still have another Nana and Pa to go).The rest of the time is being taken up with friends,swimming,their horses etc.At night they have their own rooms at the other side of the house and though I never thought I'd say it,have their head phones in every waking moment.We are also dealing with what to tell them should the subject come up and are all seeing a family councilor.Basically we are doing everything we possibly can to protect them and keep our heads above water. My reason for posting on here was to see if anyone else had or had heard of similar problems.And believe me,I thought long and hard about it as most peoples(we have told very few) attitude is either they don't believe there is such a thing or can't understand what we are complaining about (or on a more revolting note,ask it they can join us)!I feel like every intimate moment is taken up with my needs and he's are being forgotten.Like every time a go near him he thinks I'm just there so he can "get me off",sad thing is that's usually how it turns out.I am feeling very vulnerable and exposed and where ,in the past he could and would protect me this one is beyond both of us.I am scared he will just give up through lack of sleep or finding someone far less high maintenance.I would like to hold he's hand without it needing to become (increasingly rough) sex.Don't get me wrong,there are parts of it that are amazing and we have learned a great deal about each other and tried things and talked about things we probably would have been too shy to before.But I have also realized just what an extraordinary guy he is and how lucky I am to have him.Whenever I have told him how I feel he just says,"we'll get though this like we get through everything else.It'll be ok 'cause I love you".I wish I could be that sure for him.But I am worried it will just all be too much for us to overcome.

[Ever2]

Hi Chandlers Wish, and thanks for the understanding.
About 5 yrs ago I contracted a seemingly "harmless" illness that one of the kids bought home from school.
Unfortunately,it had an adverse effect on my immune system,leaving me not only more susceptible to illness but
also suddenly severely allergic (including anaphylactic) to things I had been fine with before.I have got a pretty good handle
on it now,though have to be careful with new situations,food,ingredients etc.
I am an antique restorer by trade but as most of the things I need to use effect me so I can't really do it now .
I have started an online antiques store that is a lot of fun though so it's no too bad.I like being home for the kids as well.
And the animals(horses,dogs,sheep,goats,cats,fish).Saturda y is our day.Grans watch the kids or they are at friend's places and
we just spend the day together,going to garage sales,sometimes auctions doing the shopping.Come home,eat dinner with the kids,
mostly outdoors in summer.
If you took the excessive sex out of our relationship it would still be good.Sex is an important part of our relationship but not
the be all and end all.(we used to have sex 3-4 time a week I would maybe have preferred 5-6,Geez if I knew then what I know know lol).
But we are good together.My best girlfriend jokes that we are the only couple she knows who's "song" came out in 1981 still means something.
We laugh a lot.He can still make me blush.It sounds so corny but he really is my best friend.
We love our kids(even when they are being snotty teenagers lol).
We argue sometimes,usually over silly stuff.As I said in my post,he is very quiet man(though you wouldn't think so if
I'm trying to read,he's worse that the kids)! lol.He doesn't get upset much,but if he does,he's more inclined to go water the veggie
garden that to get angry,and then talk about it when all is calm.
Basically we just have a nice life together and we have worked hard to raise happy children and work out any issues before become a problem.That is why I am so worried this whole weird thing will mess everything up.I can't imagine how hard it must be for him to not
to be feeling like I am but still have to take part like he is.And I am feeling so fragile emotionally and completely lost physically.I just don't know where this will leave us.

[Ever2]

Hi Jen1447,I replied to you but it has gone away.
So if you go down to #8 that's it there.Ev.

[Lady Syrinx]

This could be medical condition that the Discoveryb Channel did a special on a while back. It was called Persistent Genital Arousal Disorde or PGAD. It effects only women and it causes it a persistent state of arousal. Maybe you should speak to a doctor.