[CHANDLERS WISH]

I don't think the OP is ready to leave him she "loves him". I think that the more questions she answers the more answers she is going to get in her mind, that perhaps she is blocking.

[kdc]

There's one thing a woman can pretty much count on: A man is pretty much the sweetest and most easy going that he can possibly be when he's having or is about to have sex.

If he's showing his butt at this time (especially with the relationship being so young), you can bet he's a monster. I'd bet the farm on it.

You need to figure out a way to leave this man as soon as possible. He will only get worse--and, thus, will not be good to you.

A woman needs to feel loved, nurtured, safe and protected by her mate. That won't happen with this guy. Trust me.

[Prettygirlsrock]

I do love him, and no I just can't up and leave a relationship even if he is abusive.

[muffin70]

Well in my opinion if he was a loving caring person then he would help you / guide you through the riding position and tell you what you are doing wrong…. Just yelling at you because you’re doing it wrong is not acceptable.

A relationship is between 2 people and there should be some give and take in any relationship. Sure if you do everything he asks for and you bend over backwards for him then of course he will be happy – but he needs to know that he needs to do that for you too. You BOTH need to be happy in the relationship.

If you really love him and want to be with him you need to sit down and have a talk with him – tell him you don’t like being yelled at during sex.

How would he like it if you were doing missionary position for example and you pushed him off and said “you’re not doing it right”?? then you rolled over to go to sleep.

If he thinks it is ok to yell at you during sex (or any other time) then clearly he is not the man for you

[muffin70]

I do love him, and no I just can't up and leave a relationship even if he is abusive.

Yes you can - just pack up your stuff and go.
if he is being abusive the best thing you can do is leave - you will be better off for it

[jns]

Woman on top positions tend not to be as directly stimulating to a guy, although it can be visually stimulating. It tends to please the woman more than the man. I've never had a partner who could finish in that position even though it's great for me. My husband finds it really hot though looking at my breasts and all the contractions from my enjoyment. When I'm done we always switch positions or just go to a hand job to finish him. It's probably nothing you are doing wrong if you are enjoying yourself. It probably just doesn't bring him along and he is too in to it for his own gains instead of helping you also receive enjoyment. The reaction also points to anger issues.

This goes to show that guys are different, too. I love reverse cowgirl and it is one of the positions I can climax the strongest in. If it is regular cowgirl and she leans over and tangles tongues with me, it can be equally explosive. In reverse I can use my hands to help her with the effort as well as getting the right cadence (for some reason I like it fairly slow.) I love the look of her going up and down and of her butt as well. In regular, I am not a breasts man, so the view of breasts does not excite me enough. As I said tongue is the key.

There are different actions that you can do when on top. One is straight up and down, which will get tiring after a while. Another is to lay over forward on him and roll your butt forward and back (I guess this is booty popping.) A third way is to lean forward with your hands on his legs or chest and arms straight. A fourth way in reverse cowboy is to have him raise his knees and hold onto his knees or legs.

Girl on top positions are great because the girl is in charge. To me, not being the one initiating can be mentally stimulating.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I do love him, and no I just can't up and leave a relationship even if he is abusive.

List 15 things that you love about him ...

And, why could you not leave him "even if he is abusive"... ?

[Prettygirlsrock]

Because I'm financially invested in this relationship...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Can I just state something?

You are anonymous. Unless you've used a user name that he can trace? If so perhaps we can change it. If not, ok so you are financially invested in this relationship, but that does not mean he owns you, can control you, can scare you, can tell you off and swear, curse and punch things because you don't give him the "right" sex that he wants. Sounds to me that he's on a good thing. He knows you can't leave and you feel that the only thing that you can do, is to keep trying, what ever it takes, what ever he wants.

Do you really want to live this way?

[Justice]

Because I'm financially invested in this relationship...

There are variety of things this could mean ....

So are you taking steps to get "un-invested"?

You have to be invested in your safety and well-being.