[Explorer44]

but true

[Texinator]

That's like looking at pictures of steak and licking the screen when you could be having the juicy filet mignon that's waiting for you in the kitchen.

[WildChild]

You'd be surprised how many men do exactly that. It's seem if they know they have a woman who loves and desires them ALL the time, they just take it for granted.

[Texinator]

Hmm..

* licks computer screen *

Nope. That's no fun.

Sometimes I wonder if that's just selfishness. He gets to control what porn he watches, how long he watches it, and what he does while watching. And if he's in a hurry he can get his kicks in two to three minutes. No partner to 'worry' about.

[WildChild]

Porn certainly is emotionally disconnected. You don't have to care, to be tender or loving. It's just a fantasy, not the real thing.

[caterpillar79]

You'd be surprised how many men do exactly that. It's seem if they know they have a woman who loves and desires them ALL the time, they just take it for granted.

You make a good point. It is the thrill of the hunt, the thrill of the chase. The never-ending roller-coaster! I hope, as I go back into the realm of lifetime commitment that he and I would be able to keep the love burning bright!

Keep the ideas coming...

Porn is really a lifetime battle for us I bet. Unless we ourselves change the way we look at it, we'll lead an indifferent heart. I, for one HAD this going for sometime. I really don't want to deal with this pain (I pray!).

[Moni306]

You'd be surprised how many men do exactly that. It's seem if they know they have a woman who loves and desires them ALL the time, they just take it for granted.

This is the truth I believe. They know it is there anytime they want to take it...one day they wake up and find themselves alone...that is when they realize they had the best thing right next to them and they neglected them till they left. In my first marriage my husband looked at porn ALL the time but the weird thing was as far as I knew he did not masturbate but he didn't want anything from me either after watching it. In that relationship I withdrew and eventually we divorced....he did not want it but after 14yrs I could take it no more. Now...here I am again with a man who wants to look at porn all the time AND masturbate. I'm trying to make it work by not withdrawing and work through it with him but I admit it is a tough road! Like I said though before he left for his hunt for a week it appears that he was curbing back on both and using me...we shall see how it works out when he gets back this weekend

[Moni306]

Hello all...just wanted to post an update. Hubby came home on Saturday...had sex on Sunday morning and that has been it. Monday hit and is now back to surfing porn both days!! I'm giving up for now...I refuse to compete with porn...if he asks I'm going to tell him that is his choice if he prefers to use porn instead of a real woman...his wife....I'm just not going to do it anymore!! I love him but afraid this may be seriously detrimental to our relationship and don't know what more I can do! I don't feel like going for it when he has told me that masturbating and watching porn takes away his sexual desire...so what is there to go for when he has already spent himself on himself :0( I am at a loss and now wondering what I do next....I mean a week away from your wife and you have chosen the porn...AGAIN! I still have the extremely high drive...but believe it is beginning to become deflated...so so very sad :0(

[WildChild]

You are starting to shut down. I've done it a couple of times - it happens when I'm really unhappy or feeling completely unwanted in a relationship and it's painful. You are shutting off a side of yourself that increases the hormones in your body that produce good feelings and brings pleasure and joy into your life. Try to find ways to take care of yourself. It's so hard because you are committed to Him sexually and emotionally and HE is committed to?????

[Texinator]

HE is committed to?????

Jerking off to the sight of fake barbie dolls?

Maybe it's a porn addiction. He's aware that masturbating to porn keeps him from wanting to have sex. So why does he do it? Something is not right..