[Carlabd01_]

We started talking about how things were starting to get boring so i opened up to him and told him that i simply didnt have that desire i used to have and that i didnt know why that maybe because of stress or because i had children but he didnt understand he got upset and said that it was because i wasnt atracted to him anymore and that he didnt fullfill my needs.

And well i dont masturbate anymore at all and when i did i tried different things but i never got there so i just stopped

[jns]

Kitty said "**ding ding ding** And that is probably the cause for your lacking interest." when she found out that you have never achieved orgasm. Do you want to try again to find out if you can bring something new to you relationship with it hopefully bringing renewed interest in sex on your part? Every woman is different so it may take a while to hit upon a method that works but we have a few people to offer suggestions and ideas.

[atskitty2]

Well, those are his own insecurities coming out with those remarks. <br />
Have you considered counseling? <br />
<br />
I really think you should retry masturbation. Google ideas and try to relax and be patient for yourself. Are you on any medication? Stress in your life, other than these issues?

[Stillness]

Is orgasm really that big a deal for all women?

[DreamP346]

What does your partner do to please you?

Also, orgasm is not the only thing in sex. When you did enjoy, what did you like? Do you still like those things? Has your partner stopped doing them? Does your partner romance you?

Masturbation is usually the best first step. Have you tried toys? Some women need intense clitoral stimulation that only a vibrator can achieve.

[Carlabd01_]

Yes i guess i should try again and find different ways to do it,
Im epileptic so i take several medications and i do have alot of stress right now i think thats why i just gave up because i havent had any time for myself and to try again

And i dont know if this is unusual but i actually feel more pleasure when he masturbates me than when he penetrates me, and toys we used them before but then we stopped its just that with so many things in our heads and his work schedule is completely different from mine we dont have much time together

[jns]

And i dont know if this is unusual but i actually feel more pleasure when he masturbates me than when he penetrates me, and toys we used them before but then we stopped its just that with so many things in our heads and his work schedule is completely different from mine we dont have much time together

This is not unusual, when he is masturbating you, his focus is on you and not on himself. Furthermore, he is able to precisely focus where he is stimulating to give you the most amount of pleasure. Does he also give you oral?

[atskitty2]

*stillness: no i don't think it's that big of a deal, but when you've never had one, of course i think it's a factor in her lack of interest.

[Carlabd01_]

I actually dont feel very comfortable with oral but its because of my insecurities, he does like doing it but i dont so...

[muffin70]

I think you both need to sit down and have a good talk about things.... many things can make a woman or a man lose interest in sex... stress / medication / feeling tired...etc...

wife & I had a talk like this and it really helped.... every 3-4 months we decide to have a night away at a motel / hotel and wife finds once we are away from the stresses of every day life, she is more relaxed... and for some reason we always have good sexual experiences when we go away for a night..... I don't know if you are in a position to be able do this with 2 kids...

my wife will not give me oral sex unless I am wearing a flavoured condom (boysenberry or chocolate are her favourites) and even then she will stop well short of my orgasm and finish me off by hand.

is there anything your husband can do to put you more in the mood? is there anything you can do to your husband to make him more happy sexually?

like I said - have a talk to him about it... be open and honest