[anonymouswhitefemale]

I don't think this is a troll.

What was the thing that happened at school? It might shed some light or be helpful, and this is all anonymous anyway so what have you got to lose? Humans are remarkably "cause and effect" even if we like to maintain that we have control and free will. In fact, your brain knows what you're going to do almost half a second before you yourself realise it, in a way we're just watching over the biological machine that is us....

Sorry if I'm getting a bit existential.

[jenniferand2]

if this is really true and you need help

Im 41yr old and a virgin, my problem is i masturbate a lot, 3/4 times a day sometimes it can be more to the point im sore, anyway reason im posting here is i need advice, i have a major problem which is scaring me and upsetting friends or losing friends because of it, when i get aroused i seem to want to tell ppl mostly women that im hard and need to masturbate or i am, and the way i do this is either msn or texts or through some sort of chatroom or through a game called world of warcraft, in this game u can whisper ppl, so when i get hard and need to masturbate i pm a female i know, or any female character in the game although the character might be male, and tell them im horny etc, now this is freakin me out, as i dont have an answer why i do this, but what scares me the most is what if the person i whisper is a child?
I dont want to do this i want to STOP my sex drive if im honest, and doing what i have ive already lost valued friends i loved and cared about as u can understand as its some think ppl just dont want to know esp women, and its making me depressed, i dont want to be like this and why i am i dont know as ive only been like it the past 18months, and i just cant explain why. i do admit im addicted to masturbation, i have been to my GP and also seen a sex therapist and they have both said i have no self control and if i cant stop then my doctor can do so by castration or chemical castration but her and my therapist think it needs to be long term so maybe castration is needed, or chemical castration so if i masturbate i may just go limp, or wont reach orgasm and after a while i just wont get an erection ever again which both doctor and sex therapist having a sex drive is bad for me, even if it means i cant get sexualy turned on again basicaly limp for good, there given to sex offender to make them limp and stop them offending again,both gp and therapist want my sex drive dead so i wont expose and masturbate to young girls etc in the future and they don’t know this is recently happend when a friends daughter caught me in her toilet.

I admit i want to stop what im doing, but i cant on my own and in away i want to masturnbate and cum and not have it were i touch myself and i get no sexual feelings in my willy, but i CANNOT stop what im doing. And i don’t really have any friends i can talk to about this and seek advice so here i am posting here, and i mostly want female views as there the ones i do what im doing with although theres are the odd few guys, i just don’t have a clue it runs my life and i get depressed and even think about suicide as i wouldn’t have thought masturbation would get me down so much and to the point i have lost all the valued friends i had, there was somethink that happend at school but i didn’t post it here as wasn’t sure, but i need help but admit i cannot stop this myself sometimes i wish my gp or therapist could do things against my will then i don’t have to make the decision but i have to. So please post your views and i know i sound like a sex offender but thats what i don’t want to be i hate myself for what im doing but admit i cannot stop.

cheers
Reply With Quote

i think this could be true do you work at all? i think you need to get rid of your cam first of all. then you need to stop going to the web sites you visit. i think you need to redue your every day routine. then you should keep posting here if your having problems. maybe you should see a pyschatrist.

[Guest]

First off, id like to thank those that have replied to my post so thank you.

But i am genuine and not a fake, and i will admit the things im doing really scare me, most of all being caught by a 14yr and masturbating i think of that and i have pure hate for myself for doing what i did, one of you asked what happend when i was at school i dont want to go into detail but i was bullied and sexualy abused by two girls at my school who hurt me and made me do various things infront of them, and i would do as they said instead of being beaten up no matter how humilating it was, i am seeing a therapist for the past 2months now but there so much i need help with but the main one is the sexual side of things but i dont see my making any steps forward always two steps back, i dont always do what im doing through the internet and as for wow i dont even play that game anymore due to bored, but i have done things in public to female friends even to the mother of the 14yr old who tried to help when she would allow me to tell her when i was horny and not tellin stranger i dont know, i admit the thought of being caught masturbating and seen with an erection and cummin is the major turn on and no matter what i try i cannot stop what im doing, i am scared as what if it carries on to the point i want to be caught and the age dont make a difference just to be seen hard etc and then i start doing it to young girls or even boys thats the bit that scares me the most, i dont know why im doing what i am, all i know is i hate myself and in away means im a virgin still and dont know what sex is i wish my sex drive could be killed off as then i cant hurt anyone or loose the friends i have already, i feel like im stuck in a forest and there is no way out, i get very depressed about this and even think silly thoughts about suicide, the future scares me as i cant see a cure, ive been this way for a while but cant understand why im doing it as its not me im usualy shy and keep to myself yet here i am exposing myself, masturbating in public, tellin friends and family and stranger when im horny and masturbating, im not sure why i posted here tbh i dont have anyone to talk to accept my therapist, guess i wanted some1 to talk to and not to tell them im hard or wanking etc just a friendly ear, anyway im not here to offend anyone or upset anyone and if i have im seriously sorry.

[Little]

This might sound kind of bad, but hear me out.
Have you thought of checking yourself into a mental hospital for a while? It would keep you away from others, give you better access to psychologists, give you the opportunity to sort out meds if you happen to need them, etc.
The problem is, unless you live somewhere with socialized healthcare, it's expensive. But it's a better alternative than hating yourself so much. Give it some thought, ask your counselor about it. From what you're saying, you need serious help, but you've caught it at the right time ... before anything terrible happens.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I don't think you need to be sorry, firstly...

I think it's great that you can express and be open and honest.

Your story is not one that you are proud of but at least you acknowledge it and are wanting badly for it not to be so.

I think you did a brave thing by coming on here and sharing that with us quite frankly..

I agree, that if it is starting to turn you on having people see you do it, that this is scary, for you and for those people that you may eventually do it in front of and what from there....

Can i ask why you are still a Virgin? I mean, is it possible that if you weren't and were experiencing sex that things may be a tad different? Has this not been suggested to you?

Do you like women? Other than friends...

Sorry for the questions please don't answer them if you don't want to.

CW

[Guest]

Ok reason im still a virgin is i dont have confidence with girls/women, reason is when i was at school and found my first girlfriend (before i was bullied and sexualy abused) we was in her bedroom and i wasnt to sure what to do but we kissed and she allowed me to touch her legs and inner thigh and as i worked my hand up lets say i got over excited and i came in my trousers, next thing i know shes making excuses that i have to go home before her parents come home, and next day at school shes told her friends and shes also jumped me, this really hurt me and since then i dont have the confidence with a girl incase i get hurt again and then the bullying started by two friends of hers, as for a mental hospital it scares me just the thought but in away i wish they could just do it even without me wanting it, i wish they could put me in even against my will as i cant make the decision, sometimes i think maybe i need to be caught to have the help or medical help i need i guess, like i said in away i with my sex drive could be killed i know thats proberly say but i really do, soemtimes when im horny and hard i masturbate but theres no feelings of pleasure when i touch my penis and i struggle to stay hard or have an orgasm, but other times when im horny and touch my penis the feelings are over welming and i dont care what im doing just enjoy the pleasure if its exposing myself to some1, masturbatin infront of some1 i just dont care, but once i have an orgasm the guilt hits my like a 10ton weight and i hate myself for what ive done, i just dont see a light at the end of the tunnel and like i say im scared this will get out of hand were i dont care about the age of the person that catchs me or i expose myself to, to masturbate just the kick ofg bein seen takes over that it could be an under age girl/boy that is the thing that really scares me the most, i did tell my shrink about the 14yr old as i cant see the point in seeing her if im not totaly honest with her and tell her 50% of the problems i have instead of the 100% problems, and she said i would be classed as a sex offender or even a paedophile that freaks me out i DO NOT want to have that label over my head, i DO NOT want to be doing what i am my PENIS is running myself and making my life pure to the point what friends i had i now have zero, and family are findin it uncomfetable like my mom, i have pure pure discust in myself untill i become sexualy turned on and its a differnt me untill i have orgasm then its back to me like i say a ten ton weight.

Sorry if my posts are long, but if i post here i might aswell to 100% honest with you esle wants the point, although i feel embarassed.

But again thank you for your replies you dont know how much it means to me, im not here to tell you im horny or masturting or im about to cum, just here as dont have anyone.

so again sorry if i offend or upset you, if thats the case just say and i wont post anymore.

[sourpuss]

Are you this honest and open with your therapist?

[Guest]

Sorry about my above post and the spelling and it not making 100% at time.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Well your not here telling us things as such i don't think other than a serious problem.

We can't change our childhood there is always bullying or/and situations that we recall and wished we didn't, but that's life.

That's a lot of years ago and obviously also swayed your life...

I can't make any suggestions to you...other than if you ever feel the urge to get caught, please ensure it's in front of an adult, at least they can cope with it okay...

If that's okay to state...

CW

[Guest]

Yeah i am sourpuss, else whats the point in trying to get help if i only tell her 50% of the problem, although theres many issues i want help with, but the sexual one is my first.