[Patribella]

I see you think it is ok to generalize about why men watch porn.

NEWS FLASH this forum is called womens health, so were did you get the idea that is was just for women talking about men?

good luck finding a man who will never ever dare look at porn i doubt you will find one. unless he is some sort of jesus nut or a freak. By the way will your future partner be banned from the beach? heaven forbid if he sees another womens t*** or ***.

WHAT?

What in gods name are you talking about? I never "generalized" anything about men watching porn. But I assume, for the most part - it's to get off. Or wait, maybe it's because of the witty dialogue, life changing morale and superb acting.

You really aren't too observant are you? Well, considering this site is about "Women's Health" You'd safely assume mostly women entertain here - just guessing it's probably around 1 man for every 6 women on this site. Also, note that this board is called "Why do husbands watch porn?" Therefore, this thread is specifically designed for hmmm.... talking about MEN (husbands) who watch porn.

"Good luck finding a man who doesn't watch porn." Okay, Great.
So I guess another valid statement would be:
"Good luck finding a woman who doesn't watch soap operas and cries about breaking nails."

What a halfwit thing to say!! Why would you even say that?

And come on, sweetheart, going to the beach is a liiiiittle bit different than watching porn. My ex and I lived one block from the beach and I loved going to the ocean. But, it was actually HE who hated going because other men would constantly, blatantly disrespect him by persistantly staring at me and my bodyparts, with absolutely no reguard for our obvious signs of annoyance by it - which made for a pretty uncomfortable situation for the both of us..... Buuut, since men oogling me extremely bothered him, I told him that we could just stop going to the beach on the crowded days (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) - So that's what we did. And I had no problem with that... Because if I could do something to keep him from that pain, I would and so I did. Not going to the beach on certain days is a small price to pay for his happiness. I couldnt care less if it meant he'd smile. Too bad he wasn't the same towards me.

Oh, and I like freaks.
But, I guess I should be "normal" and seek out rat pack individuals like... you. Haha... Gimme a break.

[hotdogg]

ok patribella!

i see were you are coming from! my situation is different to yours. your ex wanted you to feel bad about yourself and that was wrong, however even if he did not look at porn he still would'nt have liked other men looking at you, he was insecure about himself.

my husband is very different to your ex! he is not the jealous type, he treats me really well, i could not ask for a better husband he tells me he loves me all the time and that i am beautiful we are soul mates. porn has never been a problem in our relationship.

it just annoys me when people try to say that i should have a problem with porn! that i should not watch it, and i should hate the fact that my hubby watches it! we are both adults and we are capable of making our own decisions. it also ****es me off when people make assumptions about why people choose to view porn, people watch for many reasons, i only know why i watch it.

i have come to the conclusion that porn can affect some peoples relationships in a negative way!

although many people do not let porn become a issue in the first place. porn does not effect everyone in a negative way.

i think porn is a lot like alcohol, many people can enjoy it with no problems, but some will abuse it and become alcoholics.

anyway this topic (porn) is getting boring so this is my last post on the subject. i still believe that porn is not evil etc, so i will always have the same view regardless!

[michele bennett]

1 year married and confused

I asked before we got married a year ago about porn. he denied. I found one. Laughed it off. 6 months ago he downloaded one, I watched it, big mistake. Just ordered one in July. He does not know I know. I am confused. I DO NOT think this is something that he does all the time or even every week, but it still hurts. Do I say something? I know that if I looked like a porn star he would still look. He is a very good man, except for this one indescretion. I want to just accept it, but it'stough, mentally. I need some good advice. Our sex life is healthy. We watched a littleporn before we were married but I really didn[t like it. This porn is different, it's anal sex, which I find really weird. No, he has never tried that with me. I am 51 and he is 66. Help me understand and live with this. If I tell him I found the dvd's, he'll know I was snooping. Not good for a marriage. Thanks to anyone who can help me with this. Signed, A good Catholic girl

[C]

Why Do Husbands Watch Porn

They watch it because it is exciting. It is sexual. It turns them on but they are not realizing the damage they are doing. They stimulate themselves and very often masturbate. In doing this they take away from the woman that should be getting all their attention. They are visiting a dream world of naked women and sexual showing and it tastes so good. They lose track of where they are in this land of sexual hunger. I know. I watched my husband twice with this and learned that I, as a woman, adore looking at not only men but women. It is the way that we were born. It turned me on too.

Both times that we watched porn a couple of years ago, we only got about 20 minutes into it and I looked over at him on the circular sofa as he was taking off his shorts and coming to me. I awaited him with my mouth open as it had gotten to me too. The same thing happened about a month later. But lucky for us we are very sexual even without this. I recall about 12 years ago we were at a motel in New Jersey where they had the Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson honeymoon tape on. I was blown away. It was my real big and hot porn. That man is hung. That night we had sex four times. I finally turned it off as I was getting sore.

For men, it is a tremendous sexual turn on. It can do a trick on a woman too but not as much. At least I hope not. Me, I am his porn star. All the way. They like to watch what they can't get. Do you women show yourselves like they do? Do you spread and let him see all of you? Do you talk dirty to bring him on? I do.....I am the older woman.....Just my thoughts. Take care....Caroline

[DOZER]

it suckz huhh i wanna please ma man too ...
i think i fit tha model look
not tha behavior cuz im tha violent sphycho ***** type an i just turn 20
he likes them pornos too i dont like to watchm kuz i feel like u feel what the **** tha ***** in tha porno has tha i dont have?
i told him tha an he can watch then wen im not around
i might try some day to sit with him an watch it together i think we should BE OPEN MINDED EVEN THOUGH IS HARD...

[ONLE_U]

Decided

I have decided that I will allow my boyfriend to watch porn, not because I agree with it but because Im working on myself. and if him watching a SEXUAL ACT is going to bother me...than I have to figure out why.
he's watching the ACT and thinking about ME...and than WE are doing the ACT TOGETHER. that is what and how i allow it to be 'ok'

[swoosh]

I am new to this site, and found it by googling "what to do when your husband loves porn". i recently discovered that my husband has been watching and masterbating, in private, to porn for years. we are happily married (1 year), have a good sex life, and since i discovered that he does this, we have talked about it. I want to be ok with it but naturally feel strange about it, mostly because he has always hid it and did not want me to know. He said that he will not watch it anymore, and is sincere about not wanting to do it, especially because he does not want to hurt me. But I have still seen porn sites in his history and it seems that he can't stop. It may be natural, i have no idea, all I know is that i do not like that he would want to hide it, that he says he does not like doing it and that he wants to stop but then he doesn't, that he chooses to do that even sometimes when i am home in bed and he could have just as easily come back to me. even after we have sex he does it. the sex is good, so that's not it. Overall i don't like that this could come between us. i want to help but don't know how. thoughts? please help.

[Guest]

sex addiction is not about sex - that's why it doesn't matter how good the sex was, how often you do it, how good you look ,etc.

sex addicts are medicating themselves, no different from alcoholics, workaholics, etc.

are you religious at all?

[Guest]

No disrespect intended, but I think that you might be a little too young to be posting responses on this subject, young lady..... especially ones that are as disrespectful as the one that you wrote to Emily Dudley. You have never been married...... you don't even have your driver's license yet! You haven't been living long enough to mock that dear lady. Posting responses on this subject might make you feel grown up, but you've got A LOT of living and learning to do before you can respond intelligently on this issue. Your time will be better spent concentrating on your school work - not talking about the issue of pornography with ADULTS, because this is a serious issue - not some kind of kids game.

What is your GPA? If it's not 4.0 you don't have time to be posting all of these messages on this website anyway......and if you are under the age of 18 your access should probably be terminated.

I have no idea how I passed this one. My goodness. It's old, too.

Since when did having a driver's license and a GPA of 4.0 mean I'm an adult? For your info, I have both and I still wouldn't consider myself grown. I do my schoolwork and I don't spend as much time on the computer as you think. I know it feels weird being talked down by someone's who's younger than you, but it happens.

Posting comments like the one I made previously doesn't make me feel like an adult one bit. I have no desire to feel older than I am. I quite like the way I am right now. Just because I shared my opinion doesn't automatically make me unintelligent. I do know a few things here and there. It might and might not be more than you know, but then again I'm not here to get judged by you. I give and receive advice. Porn happens to be one of the things I'm, unfortunately, very familiar with.

Also, at the time you posted that school hadn't started yet, your you telling me to concentrate on my schoolwork was invalid. Plus, you derailed the topic trying to put me in a line just for the mere fact that I'm younger than you and most likely have a bigger mouth.

Listen, I give advice on certain situations that I feel. At the time, I felt like typing what was on my mind and I did. Now, that I look back at it I probably wouldn't have added the "woe is me" part, but the rest of it would sound somewhat decent.

Now, since you don't dictate what happens at this forum you have no business telling me whether or not my account should be terminated. If you feel that way you can easily tell every other member of the forum that is under 18 the exact same thing.

Please, don't think age is a hinderance in all occasions because it certainly is not.

You have a blessed night and guard yourself when on the internet, okay?

[maria1978]

I know the feeling!!

I have been married for 5 months now...still living my honeymoon. I had left my house for a couple of hours, when I come home, I find the internet browser history open, so I check...finding a porn site on MY COMPUTER!! I cannot describe how let down I feel at the moment. Don't even know if what I am feeling is the correct way to feel. Even though I know we live in 2007, I am pretty much a traditional woman. I find these pages to be very degrading. What should I do?