[WildChild]

You know, we are seeing this a lot. Sometimes I think men only want sex if it's hard to get.

I've been though this several times - men who are all for it at first then just loose interest. I'm pretty much always "in the mood", they aren't. Then you fall into this pattern of doing things to try to get him interested, or thinking he will recipricate, so it's massages and back rubs and hj or bj and nice meals and sexy undies and what do you get? Frustrated!

Maybe this is a vast male conspiracy ladies. Repress the women, make virginity and sexual repression a big deal so the ladies aren't expecting or wanting anything and then complain constantly about that and use it to create a guilt trip. When the truth is They aren't really all that interested and this takes off the pressure to come through with any effort! OK, this is my new conspiracy theory. I think I'll go start an outline for the book.

[Guest]

OK, this is my new conspiracy theory. I think I'll go start an outline for the book.

Are you talking about the Conspiracy that you are now starting against Men........

Ouch!!!!!!!!! If anyone could be the Leader of such it would be you WC

Well for me, myself and I, I can say I never had these for the most part except the time I was so sick that I almost died.

Like It's been said before at other times the man could actually need to get checked by a doctor. Either for physical conditions or psychological reasons. Wouldn't hurt!

[WildChild]

Oh, no, no, no, not a Conspiracy against Men!
Just an expose' on this brilliant centuries old system of making it look like women are the ones with all the sexual issues,who don't want it and always have headaches (we know sex will cure them, I have a cure for sore throats too but we go into that right now). When actually men have these excuses just as often - maybe more if the posts here are any indication. I'm already formulating my hypothesis. Here's a start:

Long ago, many cultures held the belief that women were sexually insatiable. Early Christianity was very concerned with this and with how to contain and control it. So were other cultures, they tried making it so women couldn't walk, mutilating their genitals, special hairstyles or dress for married women, locking women in the house. Then someone got the bright idea that the deity (who supposedly made women that way) didn't like it and that people (One faith out of the middle east- says mostly women) who enjoy themselves too much will be tortured forever. Others redecorated an old pagan idea of virgin birth and made somehow having babies w/o have sex the ideal - if that proved impossible - women could at least have the grace not to enjoy having sex but to turn it into something they submitted to but barely tollerated. With proper training you can learn to hate anything. To add to the sense of how 'good' they were, men were blamed for being regular satyrs, who were always pestering women.

But now the cats out of the bag.... the truth is coming out- women actually like sex and want to have orgasms and let me tell you there are a lot of men out there who are sweating because this means they have to actually touch the woman and maybe put a wee bit of effort into it, instead of just saying, "hey baby I'm hung and hard, get those lips over here".

I think I could have a best seller here. I'll put in lots of footnotes and long bibliography and appendix - don't you love books that it seems like the bibliography and appendix are half of it? Lots of interviews with women to show how many want it and aren't getting it, I could do about 15 extra volumes of those. Interviews with men might be harder to get since they are mostly glued to the TV or a game control but I could probably get a few, "huh, what?" or maybe, "Not right now I'm too tired", or even, "did you say something - I wasn't listening". That ought to make for facinating reading. Ya think?

I got to find my pencil sharpener and some paper, write all this down before I lose my train of thought......

[Guest]

I told you everybody, conspiracy, and WC is the Leader Lookout Men!!!!!!!

[Hopeless Dork]

I worry about that from time to time, WC. When a man is with a woman with a high sex drive and in a committed relationship and the man knows all he has to do is touch your arm and you are ready to go I wonder if it takes the thrill out of the sexual hunt for him. Are we supposed to say no and pretend we don't want it even when we do so that they can feel they have a challenge? Maybe. But I do think society has it backwards thinking women don't like sex as much as men. In my experience and from what you see even just on these boards a lot of women, when they are in a safe loving committed relationship absolutely LOVE sex and it seems some men when they know they have it in the bag could take it or leave it.

[WildChild]

Yep, Dealing with it right now! Dealt with it in the past too. I've seen some stuff about the "thrill of the hunt" but I think they'd better focus on learning what pleases us because as more and more women start, "getting it" sexually they will be less and less willing to have ho hum or just ho, sex!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

If a woman is promiscuous, forward, it's way hot (to start with), but after some time, the more she asks, does, the more affectionate to get, the less she gets, does he feel like he is just the meat in the um sandwich? And, then when she reverts and isn't forward, does he not then feel like "what's wrong with me?", and so he tries more?

Is this not then also the reverse?

So, does this mean that neither sex can be too forward, too "hot" too wanting for "sex" on-going, because the moment they do on an on-going basis, then they are viewed as not wanting the partner, purely only wanting sex?

I seem to read both sides, male and female and this seems to be the common denominator.

Wondering....

CW

[WildChild]

Oh Dear, so we have to yo-yo? How do we keep track of who gets to be horny or when? What makes feel like I'm just being used for sex is if there is no affection, no kissing, cuddling, when it's all about him and never about me. It isn't a matter of frequency but of attitude.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Oh Dear, so we have to yo-yo? How do we keep track of who gets to be horny or when? What makes feel like I'm just being used for sex is if there is no affection, no kissing, cuddling, when it's all about him and never about me. It isn't a matter of frequency but of attitude.

HAHA.. I said that is what I am "reading"...

I certainly personally, believe that both parties have to be sexual, love intimacy, love creating, "passionate", about life in general, not dead beat people who go through life, just living but actually want to live.......explore, seek, find, be.....................

So to your above? Exactly... it is all about attitude......

[Guest]

I hope you know I was just Kidding WC, I find your Theory very interesting and certainly feel it has some validation.

I'm going to put a little elementary tho't in this concerning man and I'm not of the belief that all men are like this. I'm thinking of this as just a small part of some of our other issues at hand.

When the novel came out "When a New Cow Becomes and old Cow: by Laura Ziqman - In short the "New Cow" theory they made a Movie about it. where the Bull cow just decides he wants a new cow, because the old cow is just that, "old hat."

I found it a little tho't provoking altho the movie ends up saying and (I'm thinking just because they were trying to be politcally correct) that it was a silly theory, so to speak.

Excuse me for relating cows to humans but Laura considers herself an authority on Male behavioral. Why I mention this is because when this process begins to happen I wonder is that when all the different emotions and problematic actions begin to take place. Again I'm not stereotyping all men but sometimes I wonder if this to is not an issue for some of our dilemma. What do you think, is this totally off base and too elementary